I turn to my brother, my best friend, and grit my teeth. “Yeah, Rob. There’s somethin’ wrong with you.”
He flashes a wide grin and makes me think homicidal thoughts.
“And you!” Mom smacks my arm again. “You are twenty-one years old. You are not a damn child! You can’t do stupid shit anymore and expect the cops to laugh it off. The choices you make will follow you around. It’s called a rap sheet! Jon?” Mom half spins to her left. “Jon!”
“Here, Sunshine,” he says from her right.
She spins the other way. “Tell him! These bad choices will follow him around for life.”
Dad drops his gaze a little, nods solemnly, and rests a hand on her shoulder. “It’s called a rap sheet.”
“And he won’t get a nice job!” Mom screeches.
Dad nods. “No one will hire you.”
“And now you risk going to jail!”
“Well,” Dad smothers a snicker and wipes his free hand over his lips. “I doubt you’re going to jail today, but—”
“No but!” Mom shoves his hand off her shoulder and snarls when he tries to place it back.
Just like that, we’re reminded of the million silly arguments Jon and Casey Hart have had over the last twenty-one years.
She’s his Sunshine, and he’s her Leo, her brave lion.
Except when she’s got her temper going, in which case, he’s cowardly as fuck.
Every single time Mom tried to discipline my brother and I, she would try to force Dad to be the heavy. Almost every single time, Dad would end up in timeout with us, because he can’t punish us any more than Mom can stay mad at him.
We’re a team, we’re Harts, and hell, we’re unbreakable… except when Mom’s on a tear.
“You will go to prison today, Luke Hart! And you know what?” She pokes my shoulder. “In jail, there’s only one toilet to share between ten men.”
“Oh no.” My voice sounds genuine, even if on the inside, I’m laughing.
“Oh yes!” she counters. “And there’s no door to the bathroom. There is no bathroom at all! There’s just a cell, and a toilet, and all your new buddies will see you poop!”
“That doesn’t sound fun.”
“And slop for dinner!” she continues. “Oatmeal, and bread, and water. That’s all you get!”
“Not sure that’s tru—”
“You will go into prison with a normal-person tan, but you’ll come out gray. Like, gray skin, from bad food and no sun. And possibly, you’ll have a boyfriend too, so how do you think you would like that?”
“But…” I add a little extra quiver to my voice just to fuck with her. “I like girls, Ma.”
“I know you do! And that’s exactly why we’re here today. You were with a taken woman, on the campus of a college you do not attend, and when you got caught by her man, you fought him!”
“And two of his biggest teammates.” I grin for a moment, expecting an ‘Attaboy’ for being so badass, but then Casey ‘Tink’ Hart turns a new shade of pissed off. So I shut it down. “I’m sorry, Mommy.”
“You were in a fight that you never had to be in!”
“Luke?” Jessica Bishop is my lawyer. My legal eagle. My sex-on-legs, platinum blonde, ass for days, smile-that-makes-men-weak, mom to twins, legal team who wears skirts to work and has a sharp tongue that cuts down even the baddest men.
She’s also happily married to a certified thug. So I tend to keep my thoughts about her ass to myself.
“We’re going in now. Tink,” she looks to my mom. “Do up your top button.”
Mom looks down at her blouse, frowns, and pops another button. “Like this?”
“No,” Jess snickers. “Do it up. The judge will toss you on your ass if you go in there with cleavage.”
“He needs me to go in there with cleavage,” Mom whisper-hisses and shoots me the stinkeye. “My son is going to prison today, so if showing off my cleavage will help, then that’s what—”
“Sunshine?” Dad grabs his wife’s arm, spins her around, and goes to work buttoning her up. “Put them away.”
“If he gets a crotchety old man judge, then he’s gonna need me to show more boob!”
“Mom!” Rob works his way into the fray. “Just do it up.”
“So…” Grinning, I stand beside Jess and bump her arm with my elbow. “How’s it going?”
“Shut up. When we go in there, your job is to sit down, shut up, and let me speak.”
“Ever since you came on as my legal rep, I’ve been thinkin’—”
“Don’t do that,” she cuts in. “It’ll hurt.”
“Ha.” I roll my eyes and take a step toward the heavy wooden doors when a dude in a guard’s uniform opens them up. “You’re a twin, and I’m a twin.”
“Don’t do it, Hart.”
“I’m sexy, and you’re sexy.”
“I will kill you,” she grits out.
“And Kane Bishop is a pussy, so there’s no need to be afraid of him—”
A heavy hand slams down on my shoulder with so much force that my lungs empty and my knees buckle.
Swinging around, I’m met with a pair of eyes that flicker between bright and pissed.
“Shut the fuck up, kid.” Theo Griffin is a scary dude. A big dude. A dangerous dude. He also happens to be Jess’ brother-in-law, and he has zero tolerance for my brand of shenanigans. “One chance. Then you’re gonna be picking bullet shells outta your back.”
“Geez.” I look around in search of backup. I look to the guard at the door. I look to Jess. Then, as a last-ditch effort, I look to Libby. A cop. And Griffin’s wife. “Help me?”
“Stop hitting on Jess, stop sending your mother insane, and stop fighting football teams. That’s my advice.”
“I didn’t ask for advice.”
“You asked for help.” Libby flashes a playful grin and enters the courtroom ahead of us. “That was me helping.”
“Ah, crap.” Mom’s soft voice brings my eyes up.
I look around in search of whatever upset her. I look to Rob, to Dad, then to the judge.
A woman.
I glance back and grin when Mom hurriedly rebuttons her shirt.
“Sit down,” she hisses, “shut up, let Jess do her job.”
“Will you still love me if I go to prison?”
“No! I made two of you so I could mess one up and throw him away.”
“Geez.” Rob snickers and tucks his arm around hers; it looks like he’s supporting his mom, but what he’s actually doing is restraining her – much the same way Dad is doing on her other side. “I guess it’s lucky I’m the perfect one.” He looks to me and grins. “Sucks to be you, trashbag.”
“Shut the—Agh!” I swing around and swallow down my cry when Jess grabs my damn ear.
Beautiful, perhaps. But she’s mean.
“Sit down,” she hisses under her breath. “Shut your trap. I have nothing to lose here today. Whether you’re a free man or not, my bill is still gonna be paid.”