A fact which his fellow firefighters had brought up many times over the years. Not that it mattered.
“I don’t want any other woman. I want you.” Curling his fingers around hers, he stroked his thumb across her pulse point and felt it jump. “Is that a problem for you? Because I meant what I said. If you don’t want to go here, I’m not forcing anything. I’ll back off and we’ll forget it ever happened.”
Her silence stretched out so long, Caleb began to sweat.
“Could you actually forget that kiss?”
Did that mean she could? Or she couldn’t?
“Not a chance in hell. I’ve basically spent every waking minute since I stopped, thinking about doing it again.” Might as well embrace the honesty here. “But if that’s what you needed me to do, I’d make my best effort.”
She looked away, dropping her free hand to Mooch’s head and stroking. The dog leaned into her leg in absolute bliss. Lucky bastard.
Please don’t say you want to go back to being friends. He’d made the promise, and he’d try to keep it, but he didn’t know how the hell he’d pull it off. Not now that he knew how she tasted, how well she fit against him, and the sounds she made when—
“I wouldn’t have come tonight if I had a problem with it. I just…”
“Just what?”
“I don’t understand what you see in me. I mean, you’ve seen me at my lowest point, my messiest, my least together. What’s attractive about that?”
Was she kidding?
“Everything. You’ve never put on airs, never pretended to be someone you’re not. I don’t have to wonder if you’re going to turn into someone else once the honeymoon period is up because I know you. You’re unapologetically you, flaws and all—and I find those pretty charming. That kind of confidence is sexy as hell.”
Her laugh was short. “None of that was confidence, Caleb. It was you being out of my age bracket and out of my league besides. The possibility for anything like this was literally never on my radar.”
He didn’t like the idea that she thought he was out of her league. It made her sound like she thought she was less than somehow, and that couldn’t be further from the truth. But he tackled the part of her statement he actually had an answer for. “Are you still on the age thing? I thought we settled that.”
She pursed her lips. “We didn’t settle anything. You dictated.”
“I did—but only because I knew you’d balk otherwise. But let’s circle back because I think this is one of the biggies for you. Why is the age difference an issue? We’re both grown adults. We didn’t have some prior relationship where you were my babysitter or something. If the situation were reversed and I was the older one, nobody would bat an eye. It always struck me as a weird double standard. What is wrong with two consenting, grown adults of any age being into each other?”
She opened her mouth as if to protest, then closed it again. “You’re right. There is no rational reason that an older woman going out with a younger guy is inherently different than the other way around. I can’t decide if that makes me feel better or not.”
“Why wouldn’t it?”
Heat crept into her cheeks. “Because I’ve felt like such a dirty old woman checking out your ass.”
Her admission made him want to do a fist pump and a victory lap around the yard.
“First off, you are nowhere near old or somehow league deficient. Second,” he grinned, “you checked out my ass?”
Hiding her face behind her glass, she muttered, “I mean, it’s a work of art. It seemed like a crime not to.”
“Feel free to have a tactile inspection anytime.”
“You’re terrible.” The blush spread down her throat and into the collar of her shirt. He wondered if it kept going on down to cover those breasts he was trying not to stare at.
“You like it.”
She held his gaze for a long, long moment, and Caleb held his breath.
“Yeah, I do.”
Lifting her hand, he brushed a kiss to her knuckles. “As far as I’m concerned, that’s a good start.”
Chapter 6
The broad palm Caleb pressed against her lower back was a distraction as they navigated the crowds of Lower Broadway. She hadn’t been up here since the night of the accident—since Blaine. The sight of all the neon signs and honky-tonks had all that old bitterness swirling back up. She’d avoided this place on principle, not wanting to remember that night and everything that came after.
But Caleb had secured tickets to a sold-out show for Kyle Keenan, one of Nashville’s up-and-comers. As their first public outing, it was a good choice. No one knew them here. While it wasn’t outside the realm of possibility that they could run into someone they knew, it wasn’t the same as if they’d gone out in Hamilton. There was a freedom in anonymity. She could focus on them. On him. And he was a helluva thing to focus on.
She still couldn’t quite believe Caleb was here with her.
After considerable angsting, she’d made a major effort for tonight, doing up her hair and makeup, pulling out an outfit that showed off attributes she’d forgotten she had. Nothing about her appearance said “mom,” and when Caleb periodically looked down at her, his gaze raking over every inch in an appreciative sweep that was almost a physical caress—the only kind she’d gotten since that back deck kiss because he’d slowed way the hell down—it felt good. She felt sexy.
He was good at bringing that out in her. Over the past week, he’d managed to convince her he was sincerely into her, and she was no longer certain she was being punked. Mostly, she felt lucky to have snared the interest of a gorgeous, honorable, interesting guy. One who caught the eye of every woman in a thirty-foot radius. It was hard not to preen, just a little, at the looks of envy being shot her way.
Once they reached the venue, Caleb steered her past the entrance, with its trailing line wrapped several layers deep down the sidewalk. Instead, he led her around the corner and down the alley behind the building.
“What are we doing?”
“Going in the back.”
“I don’t think we can do that.”
He flashed those double-barrel dimples and knocked on the door. “You can with my connection.”
A tank of a dude, who was obviously a bouncer, opened it. His scowl instantly faded. “Hey, Caleb.”
“Hey, Hank.”
Hank stepped back and waved them inside. “Come on back.”
So Caleb had an in with some of the crew or something? Wow. That was lucky.
They trailed Hank down several narrow corridors before stopping outside a closed door. Hank jerked a head toward it. “He’s waiting on you.”
“Thanks, man.” Caleb saluted him and knocked.
A moment later, the door swung open and Kyle Keenan himself beamed at them. He pulled Caleb into a back-thumping hug. “Been too damned long, man. Come in.”
Stunned, Emerson could only follow them inside, cutting a glance at her date. “You know Kyle Keenan?”
Kyle clutched his chest and gave a dramatic stagger. “You wound me, little brother, not telling your lady about me.”