2:23 PM: We need to talk.
Like fuck we do. Not today, anyway. I’m too overwhelmed by my mom’s strange request, and of course his weird interaction with his own mother has left me rattled. I need time to think and process before I can see him again, so I ignore the text and tuck my phone back into my pocket. I just want to forget about everything that has happened. As I reach my floor, I make my way straight to my room, shutting and locking the door behind me.
“Your phone’s blowing up. Everything okay?”
I let out a sigh and peek up toward Loni. “Sorry. I’ll turn it to silent.”
Grabbing my phone from where it’s resting on the floor, I spot yet another text from Saint saying we need to talk. He’s relentless and has sent me tons of messages since this morning. Even though I know I’m poking the bear every time, I ignore this one like all the rest and turn my phone to silent.
Loni and I are in her room finishing our interrupted movie from last night, but I just can’t get into it again. My mind is running a thousand miles a minute, my thoughts jumping from Jenn, to Saint, to Mrs. Angelle, and back again. I’m trying not to let Loni see how anxious I am, but I don’t know that I’m doing such a great job of it. She keeps glancing toward me, her lips pursed in clear concern, but she doesn’t question me about anything.
I appreciate her not pushing me to reveal details about my night with Saint, though I’m certain she’s dying to know more about it. A part of me wants to tell her and unburden myself of his drama and bullshit, but I just can’t get the words to form. Even after her reassurances that she’s there for me, which I completely believe, it just doesn’t seem fair to put all my shit onto her as well.
Is that even more selfish than just telling her?
Who the fuck knows.
When the movie finally finishes, we sit in silence for several long moments. I feel like I should leave, but I don’t know how to do that without making it seem like I’m running away from her.
Before I can think of anything, Loni turns to me. “Are you okay?”
I stare at her with my mouth opened wide. “Y-yeah. Why?”
Her pretty features crinkle into a deep frown. “Don’t lie to me, Mallory. You may be good at it, but I know your tells now.”
That’s a strangely comforting thought. There aren’t many people who know me well enough to know when I’m being dishonest with them. I can see by the stubborn set of her jaw that she’s not letting me leave here until I give her some kind of explanation.
Resting my head back against her bed, I stare up at the ceiling and release a shuddering exhale. “There’s just a lot going on right now,” I murmur.
“Other than Saint?” There’s no amount of judgement in her voice. She’s simply asking me a question with no hidden agenda behind her words.
“There’s some stuff that’s come up. With my mom,” I admit, though I’m careful not to give too much away.
“Oh, I didn’t … I didn’t realize you were in contact with her.”
Even before the assembly, Loni was fully aware of how shitty a parent Jenn was.
“It’s on and off,” I explain. “Though it’s typically on her terms whether we’re talking or not.”
“Is she … is she harassing you or something?” I can tell Loni’s nervous to ask me about Jenn, and I don’t blame her. In her shoes, I wouldn’t know what to say to my best friend about her fugitive mother.
Lowering my gaze from the ceiling, I give her a grateful smile but shake my head. “Nothing like that. She’s just being annoying. It’s nothing to worry about.”
She looks relieved. If she wasn’t so nervous to talk about my mom, though, I’m pretty damn sure she’d push me for more. Since neither of us are really willing to talk more about Jenn, we let the subject drop. The urge to leave goes away as well, and we talk about things that don’t weigh us down, like what a success the Valentine’s Day dance turned out to be. I’m sure it was, in part, because I didn’t attend and wasn’t able to cause a new catastrophe.
For a few hours, at least, with my phone on silent and my best friend talking animatedly about streamers and paper mache, I’m able to calm my mind enough that I relax and pretend my world isn’t smoldering around me.
The next evening, I decide to go swimming, despite Liam’s warning about campus police patrols. It’s Sunday night, so who’d be paying attention anyway? Besides, I need to burn off the nervous energy that keeps pulsing through my body.
Campus is quiet as I make my way to the rec center, which in and of itself is a blessing. When I reach the pool, I’m not expecting to find anyone there waiting for me, so I literally jump from shock when I find Liam sitting on the bleachers.
“Holy shit, what are you doing here?” I demand, breathless. “Are you just in here brooding like an asshole?”
He glares at me as he stands, and I see he has a cut lip.
“What happened?” I immediately ask, concern softening my tone.
“Nothing,” he snaps. “Nothing for you to be concerned about, anyway.”
Ugh, this guy. I cross my arms and erase all gentleness from my tone. “There’s no reason to be a dick. I’m asking because I care, all right? Now tell me how this happened?”
His lip looks pretty bad. It’s not bleeding at present, but I’m guessing it was gushing when he first got it.
He rolls his eyes, but finally relents. “I got into it with your precious Saint, alright?” he growls. “By the way, you’ve been summoned by his royal fuckhead. He’s been looking for you.”
“So … he kicked your ass to make a point?” I don’t understand their relationship in the least.
He steps closer to me, and I feel the tiniest shiver run up my spine at the frustration in his eyes. “Are you with him again?” he asks, his voice low and deadly.
Irritation flares within me, and I want to tell him it’s none of his goddamn business, but that would mean I’d have to make his stupid question worthy of a response. Instead, I just stare up at him defiantly with my lips sealed.
He tries to crowd me by moving even closer, but I don’t budge. I’m not about to surrender an inch of ground to him.
“You remember what I told you last semester?” he demands. “Saint knew you before he ever met you. That would be an immediate red flag to any sane person. Plus, let’s not forget all the humiliation you’ve suffered at his hands. Or does that kind of thing get you off?”
“Don’t start with me, Liam,” I warn softly. “We’re friends until you force me to stop wanting to be.”
Anger flashes across his bronze features, and he grabs my shoulders and shoves his face close to mine. “There are people at this school that actually give a shit about what happens to you,” he insists. “People that don’t want to hurt you but want to protect you and not see you fall on your fucking face.”
I open my mouth to counter that he’s never protected me from Saint, but my words fall dead on my tongue when his mouth suddenly descends on mine. His kiss is furious and desperate, just like him. I shove against his chest with all my might, ripping my lips away to snap, “Stop it!”