I drop my stuff down on one of the bleachers, then make my way to the edge of the pool, next to the lane he’s swimming in. He stops his lap and moves toward me.
“Hey,” I say with a little wave.
He grins, resting his arms on the edge of the pool. “You all right?”
I shake my head. “No, not really, but I think this will help.”
“Then what are you waiting for?”
An excellent question. I pull off my sweatpants and t-shirt and toss them toward my stuff as I move to an empty lane.
Instead of diving in, I slip into the water slowly, and it feels like I’m slipping back in time. To before the assembly from hell, and even before Saint and I were … whatever the hell we were.
Liam and I swim in silence, but it’s warm and familiar. Comforting.
Just what I need.
As I cut through the water, for the first time all day, I feel calm.
With Liam swimming next to me, I even feel safe.
Eventually, we both take a break and meet in the middle of the pool, hanging onto the ropes to keep us afloat while we rest.
“So, what’s the deal with you and Porter?” he asks, taking me by surprise.
“What do you mean? You were at the assembly,” I answer, praying he doesn’t notice the snag in my voice. “He hates me because he thinks I’m the reason his brother’s dead.”
He studies me for several moments. “Is that really everything?”
No. Not by a long shot, but I have to keep that secret to myself. I refuse to let it ever see the light of day, so I nod. “Wouldn’t you be pissed if you thought someone you were forced to see every day had a hand in your brother’s death?”
Lifting a tattooed arm, he skims his fingers through his wet black hair and makes a face. “Well, sure, but I wouldn’t put myself in the position to see them every day.” Ah hell, here we go. “And the way he completely left you to that shit in class today … that takes some real hardcore loathing for a teacher to do that.”
“What can I say?” I shrug and flutter my lashes. “You either love me or hate me, and most people around here really, really hate me.”
“That’s not your fault,” he points out. “That’s Laurel and Saint’s fault. If they hadn’t screwed you over from day one, you would’ve been fine.” When I scrunch my nose, the side of his mouth quirks upward. “You’ve seen how guys at this shithole act around you. Just imagine how it would’ve been if those two hadn’t fucked everything up.”
“It’s funny—I always saw you as more of the artsy type than a comedian.”
He bends his face closer to mine. “Stop putting yourself down. That’s not a sexy trait.”
I groan, but my heart beats a little faster. “I swear to God, Liam—”
He holds up a hand to silence me. “I’m not trying to get into your panties, Mal, though I’m not going to say I haven’t…” He trails off, leaving me victim to my imagination, and he chuckles when my eyes go wide. His gaze sparkles when he adds, “I’m just saying—”
“Yes, yes, I get it,” I cut him off quickly. “Confidence is sexy, blah, blah, blah. Can we please swim now?”
His expression is a mixture of amusement and exasperation, but he nods, his dark hair flinging tiny droplets of water in my direction. “Yes, we can swim now.”
“Thank you,” I say before taking off to the start of my lane. As I get back into my workout, I try not to think about Liam’s words, but they’re ringing in my head.
If it hadn’t been for Laurel and Saint, I wouldn’t be so despised. They ruined my life at the beginning of the semester and again during the sports assembly. I still don’t understand why, though. Laurel isn’t hard to figure out. She’s self-conscious, jealous, and hates not being the center of attention. If Saint was looking at me, and not looking at her, of course she’d want to destroy me.
In fact, had I never caught his attention, my interaction with Laurel would have ended the day I got out of that SUV when she and Gabe picked me up from the airport.
But Saint? I can’t figure out his motivation apart from pure, unadulterated hatred. The thing is, I don’t believe he simply hates me that much. In my mind, there’s no way he could’ve touched me the way he had—no possible way he could have shared his own secrets—if he truly despised me.
Despite the water helping to clear my thoughts, I’m not closer to figuring out what Saint could be thinking. I try my best to convince myself I don’t care.
And yet, when I finally fall asleep hours later, the fucker is on my mind.
My late-night swims with Liam become my safe haven. The one place and time where I don’t feel completely beaten down by the world. The rest of my week is just one hellish day after another, but at least I have the pool to look forward to. The pool, the yearbooks that the librarian has put on order for me, and Liam. After Loni and Henry, he’s about the closest thing to a friend I’ve got in this place.
When Friday night arrives, I’m exhausted. I’ve endured Dylan’s blatant revulsion and disregard for my wellbeing, Laurel’s evil bitchiness, Saint’s cold aloofness, and everyone else’s bullshit for five days straight. If not for my nights with Liam, I would’ve snapped days ago. We still haven’t talked much, but I’m completely fine with that. I don’t want him to tell me how sorry he is for me, or to unburden my soul to him. I just enjoy his steady presence, and to know that there’s at least one more person at this school who doesn’t wish I’d step in front of a bus.
I’m halfway to the pool, ready to work the stress of this week away, when my phone buzzes in my pocket. Pulling it out, I glance at the lock screen and see that I’ve got a text. Thinking it’s probably Carley or Loni, I open my phone without thought and check my messages.
I frown when I see that the number’s not one that I recognize, but my features completely fold as I read the short text.
9:24 PM: Meet me at your room.
What the hell? Meet who at my room?
A thousand possibilities start to shoot through my mind and curiosity begins to eat at me. What if it’s the person who sent me that photo? What if they want to tell me, at last, what their note meant?
I stop walking and gaze ahead toward the rec center, before glancing back over my shoulder at my dorm building. Biting my lip, I consider the possibility that someone’s playing a trick on me. Maybe it’s just Laurel on a friend’s phone, messing with me?
I should probably just keep going to the pool. Meet up with Liam like every other night and swim my stress away.
But I can’t silence the nagging voice in my head telling me this could be something big. Something significant.
Something I’ll regret ignoring.
Groaning in defeat, I give into my curiosity and turn back for my dorm. I shoot off a quick text to Liam, telling him something came up and not to expect me. It still feels weird texting him, but with the threats I’ve been receiving since I got back, he’s been fairly insistent on keeping tabs on me.
Fishing my keys and pepper spray out of my bag, I’m nervous as I hurry back to my dorm, knowing this is probably a really stupid idea. I just can’t stop myself. Maybe that’s my biggest problem? I don’t know when to say no to stupid things.