She watched him over the rim. “Do you? I mean, do you really?”
“I think so, yes.” Jared lifted his own cup and took a sip of tea. “So, why don’t you start by telling Daddy what you didn’t like?”
“That.” She clung onto her cup as though it was somehow going to protect her from the intensity of Jared’s stare.
“The Daddy thing?”
“Yes,” she admitted in a rush. “And no.”
Jared laughed softly, putting his cup down. “Take a deep breath and tell me, Sophie. Let’s have the conversation we should have had right from the beginning.”
“We never even discussed age play.” Her words were a low murmur, although Jared’s choice of table ensured there was no one nearby to overhear them. “You just took me and made me your little girl.” Sophie’s breath caught at the explanation, a potent surge of both shame and desire washing over her.
“I did enjoy some of it, you know I did, but…” Her voice trailed away.
“It was too much?”
She nodded. “It’s the best way I can explain.”
“It always seemed to me the things you said you loathed ended up making you the wettest.” He raised a brow at her, daring her to defy him on this one point. “Like the playpen?”
“That was a bloody cage!” she snorted. “And I can’t believe you made me go in that thing.”
A wicked smile lit up his face. “Admit how much you enjoyed it, though.” Jared reached forward, grasping her free hand away from her plate and squeezing her fingers. “Admit how much you loved surrendering all of that control to Daddy.”
“I did.” The confession escaped her lips in a barely audible whisper, and Sophie was conscious of her cheeks flaming. “It was horrendous at the time, but I did.”
He eyed her intently. “I remember how hard I fucked you after that.” His gaze danced at the salacious recollection. “I remember how wet you were for me, and how I took your arse.”
Sophie bit her lip, the swell of memories overawing her. “Please,” she implored. “Please, I can’t. Not here.”
Jared glanced behind him for the first time. “No one is listening, little girl.”
“I know, but still. It’s too raw. The memory… it’s intense.”
He nodded, patting her hand gently. “How about an easier question then. Tell me what you did like. What could you try again?”
She swallowed at that question, more than qualified to answer it after all the months of dark longing, yet still struggling with the concept of opening up in such a public place.
“It’s difficult to talk about.”
“Try.” Jared’s tone was even yet insistent. “Please, try for me.”
“Okay.”
She pulled in a shaky breath, noticing the way his large hand had virtually swallowed her own. That was what Jared did to her. He was warm, a protector, yet in no time at all, he would swamp her, and if she allowed it—he would take her over.
“The bondage. I liked being tied, although I did hate it at times.”
“Yes.” His voice was a throaty growl. “I do recall.”
Sophie managed a smile, though she couldn’t meet his gaze.
“And being spanked,” she went on. “And when you fucked me roughly and pulled my hair, but afterward, you held me and were tender.”
Christ, the words were spilling from her now, as though she was an open faucet she couldn’t restrict.
“Thank you, Sophie.” She lifted her chin to meet his eyes. “I know explaining that can’t have been easy.”
“No.”
It hadn’t been, but she was pleased to have said it—glad he knew. The man who had captured her rarely ever asked for feedback, and it had taken many years for her opinion to be heard.
Jared smiled. “You liked being humiliated. I remember that.”
Shit. Had he really just said that, sitting in the corner of her local café?
“I-I…” She tried to respond, but her words dried in her throat.
“That’s why you responded so well to Daddy’s rules and punishments. It wasn’t the age play you enjoyed, but the way it reduced you to less than what you really are.”
Jared leaned back in his chair as he spoke. It was as if the rationale was coming to him for the first time, but that was little conciliation. The way he’d managed to successfully summate her hedonism was more than perturbing—it was terrifying.
No man had ever understood her this well before.
No one had even tried.
“Yes.” In the end, it was she could manage. “I think so.”
“Can you live with the age play, though?” Jared’s expression shifted, his body straightening as though he had reached the matter with most personal significance for him.
“It’s important to you?”
Sophie could hardly believe she had to ask after everything he had subjected her to. This dynamic of transparency was new between them, and she wanted to foster it—she wanted to know.
Hard blue eyes pierced into her. “You know it is.”
She sighed. Was she really having this conversation with the man who’d taken and belittled her? “Yes.”
Jared’s fingers shifted over her hand, entwining with her digits.
“I’ll always be your Daddy, Sophie.” His expression softened at the concept. “Whatever you decide.”
She nibbled at her lip. Christ, he was right, wasn’t he? He would always be that person for her. It would never go away—this yearning.
This void which Jared had created, and only he could fill.
“The question is, I suppose, do you still want to be my little girl?”
She met his gaze at the question. “No, that’s not the question.” Daddy. She exhaled, rather than cede to the word which burned at her lips.
“No?” That dark, alluring brow rose at her contradiction. “So, what is then? Enlighten me.”
Sophie swallowed. “I already know how alluring your darkness is. I already know how you make me feel.” She glanced down at her sandwich again, uncertain if she had the appetite for it anymore.
“The question is, what is that sweet intoxication worth?” She paused, ensuring he was listening because this—this was the crux of everything to Sophie. “I have a good life now. I have children I adore. I am not giving those things up for you, Jared. So, can this desire be interwoven into that? The real question is… can you share me?”
Jared pressed his lips into a firm line, his expression hardening, though his fingers never let go of hers.
“That sounds like two questions, little girl.”
“Yes.” She was nervous all of a sudden. “Yes, I suppose you’re right.”
“To the first, let me assure you, for me, it is worth a lot. Maybe everything.” He paused, meeting her eyes with a smirk. “As to the second, well… I was an only child, so it has never been my forte, but perhaps it’s time Daddy learned to share.”
Chapter Seven
Jared
He was nervous. Actually nervous!