Truth be told, my heart had battered against my chest during the short ride from Camp Golden Rule back to Nicole’s cabin.
I couldn’t remember the accident. Sahdev said I’d probably never remember it, but the vibrations and engine sound triggered something in the hidden recesses of my brain. I hid my panic from Ripper, refusing to compound the irrational guilt that already ate away at him.
Once we decided to spend the night, Levi found some fishing rods in the boathouse. He and Sahdev rowed the boat out to the middle of the lake. The fish were biting, lured from the water’s depths once the sunlight retreated. They caught a mess of trout and thankfully cleaned the fish without asking for help.
Ripper built a fire close to the water’s edge. Kyle carried a couple of cast iron frying pans outside, so the men could fry up the trout.
According to Ripper, Nicole loved to bake, so Chimney had installed an old-fashioned wood cookstove with a built-in oven.
Hannah and I found quart jars full of home-canned apple pie filling in the pantry. We didn’t have time to bake a pie. Instead, we baked a giant apple cobbler. There were no fresh vegetables, but we found canned green beans, evaporated milk, mushroom soup, soy sauce, and a container of crispy french fried onions. We assembled a green bean casserole. Not exactly a traditional accompaniment for fried fish, but after chowing down on way too many granola bars, I doubted that anybody would complain. Cornbread—from a mix—completed the meal.
The air chilled once the sun went down. We slipped on jackets and ate around the campfire, stuffing ourselves on fresh fish, green bean casserole, cornbread, and apple cobbler. Sated and relaxed, we all lingered around the campfire, as if unwilling to let go of the day when fortune finally smiled upon us.
Hector settled down close to the fire, basking in the heat.
A gentle breeze ruffled the lake’s surface, and a wavy image of the moon reflected on the water. Stars filled the sky, many more than we ever saw in Portland.
When a shooting star shot across the sky, my gaze followed its path. I sighed, perfectly content. There was no need to make a wish upon the star. Everything I wanted was here, within reach. I settled back against Ripper’s chest.
“I thought I might be dead by now,” I marveled, then stilled. Crap. I hadn’t intended to say that out loud. Any hope that Ripper hadn’t caught my words was dashed when he reared back, then turned me around to face him.
“What did you say, Mac?”
I reluctantly met his eyes. “I said I figured I might be dead by now.”
He smoothed my hair from my forehead. “What do you mean?”
“The only thing worse than the prospect of marrying Pastor Bill was the thought of him with his hands all over Hannah, so I proposed that he marry me instead.”
I paused and studied Ripper’s expression. How would he react to the knowledge that I’d proposed marriage to a man he despised, that I’d willingly placed myself at the pastor’s mercy?
A muscle ticked in Ripper’s jaw, but the hand that stroked my cheek remained gentle.
“He wanted a compliant, submissive wife,” I continued. “He’d already declared that I was stubborn and defiant and a bad influence on Hannah. So...so...I told him it would be more fun for him to try to break me, to bend me to his will. A better challenge to his skills than intimidating an inexperienced young girl.”
The Adam’s apple in Ripper’s throat bobbed when he swallowed.
“But all the while I had a plan to make sure that he’d never pose a threat to another young woman.”
My voice faltered under Ripper’s fierce gaze. I forced myself to continue. “His first wife, Rebecca, took away my boots, so I didn’t have my hidden knife. I found a stainless steel corkscrew in his private bungalow, and I hid it under the pillow on his bed. When he was distracted—probably digging through his drawer full of sex toys—I planned to pull out the corkscrew and kill him.”
A vein pulsed in Ripper’s temple, but he maintained an impassive expression on his face. “You were gonna kill him with a corkscrew?”
I nodded. “In our lessons, you warned me that it’s hard to kill somebody up close and personal, but I had no choice. I remember the kill spots. I was determined not to hesitate or chicken out. I was going to strike hard and fast and end him before he hurt anybody else.”
“And then?”
“Well, then I planned to escape before anybody came to check on us and found his body. I was going to take the king-sized pillows from the bed and wrap them around the razor wire, then I was going to climb the fence and shimmy over the top, and run away into the woods. Then I’d find you.”
Ripper held his breath, then slowly exhaled. “I believe in you. I believe you would have pulled it off. Thank fuck you didn’t have to.”
My plan clearly horrified Ripper, but instead of calling it foolhardy, he gave me a vote of confidence. Just one of the many reasons why I loved him.
I pointed at him and at our circle of friends around the campfire. “It still feels like a dream, like I’m going to wake up and find myself face-to-face with Pastor Bill.”
“Not gonna happen. Bastard’s rotting in hell.” His lips curved and he waggled his brows. “But if you need something to persuade you you’re really here, how about I take you to bed. Let’s see if you still wonder if I’m real when I’m balls deep inside you.”
“Shhh,” I hissed, glancing around to see if anybody overheard. Fortunately, Sahdev and Kyle were deep in conversation, and Hannah was giggling at something Levi said.
He snorted. “You think they don’t know that we’re—”
I slapped a hand over his mouth, cutting him off.
“Like that’s gonna work.” He stood and stretched, raising his arms and yawning in a pantomime of sleepiness, then offered me a hand to pull me to my feet. Without warning, he bent forward and threw me over his shoulder.
“Night, all. I’m taking Mac to bed.”
A chorus of good nights rang out.
Ripper strode toward the cabin.
“Hey, Kenzie,” Hannah called.
Ripper paused, allowing me to lift my head so I could reply. “Yeah?”
Firelight danced across the girl’s smiling face. “Levi and I are going to make huckleberry pancakes for breakfast, around nine.”
It was an effort to keep my voice natural with my ass in the air and my head dangling down his back while Ripper carted me off to bed like a caveman. “Great. Looking forward to it.”
He climbed the stairs onto the porch, snagged an LED lantern from a table, and carried me to the master bedroom, where he deposited me across the bed.
I glowered at him in mock outrage. “There is such a thing as discretion, Mr. Solis.” My voice was prim, but my treacherous lips quirked.
“Not in my world, darlin'.” He hung his cut on the back of a chair and pulled his tee over his head, baring his heavily muscled chest and shoulders.
My mouth watered.
Ripper kicked off his boots, then shoved his jeans down his legs. He knelt on the bed and stripped me, tossing my boots onto the floor. He yanked my yoga pants down my legs and peeled off my tee. Shoving my thighs apart, he climbed on top of me, supporting his weight on his elbows while he looked down.
“Now, let’s see if I can convince you that I’m real.”