“Absolutely.” I sit down at the table, bringing my feet up on the chair and pull my knees into my chest. “Is everything alright?”
She seems somber, not her usual peppy morning-person self. As she raises her eyes towards me I can tell she has been crying, her eyes are all puffy and bloodshot.
“Mom? What’s wrong?”
She fills her lungs with oxygen, “It’s your father.”
I vaguely know the dangers my dad faces while he’s on a mission. I know the chances of him coming home alive, versus him coming home dead, or even at all. “Mom, what do you mean? Have you heard from him?”
“No. Not him, but from higher up.”
My heart falls into my stomach, bile rising higher in my throat. No. No. No. This can't be happening. Since my dad is Special Ops, we knew never to expect a call from him while he was deployed. The risk was always too high. We would occasionally get letters from some unknown location, but even those took months to get through to us. This deployment was supposed to be for eighteen months.
“Mom, what did they say?” I’m torn between wanting to know and burying my head in the sand and pretending everything was still okay.
“Your father’s been missing since Christmas.”
“A month? He’s been missing for a fucking month, and they didn’t call us?”
“Presley, they did, sweetie. I didn’t want to worry you. You know it’s not uncommon for them to cut all communication if they are working something big.”
“So why now. Why tell me this now?”
“They found Staff Sargent Perez.”
“Laura’s dad? Is he okay? Is he alive?”
Mom once again fills her lungs, forcing the tears back as I feel mine ready to explode. Laura was my closest friend after Robert disappeared. We weren’t always stationed together, but we still stayed in touch. It was nice to have someone who understood what I went through.
“No, sweetie.”
I close my eyes against the stinging sensation. A tight lump is forming in my throat, cutting at me with each breath I take. I can't even imagine the pain that Laura has gone through, and I didn’t even know about it. I feel like I’ve let her down. The thought alone causes me to retch, my stomach turning in on itself as I hurry over to the sink. The contents of last night’s dinner wash down the drain.
And now, my mother, the strongest person I know, has been carrying this burden alone. She has gone through so many deployments and somehow, always manages to stay positive throughout everything. I need to be strong for her now.
I wipe my mouth and muster any strength I have left, wrapping her in a hug. “I love you, Momma. It’s gonna be okay, you’ll see. Daddy is the smartest man out there. He’ll get back to us. I know he will.”
“I hope you’re right sweetie. I hope you’re right.”
I let Kringle back in and ask Mom if she needs anything before going back to my bedroom. Trying to hold back my tears, I make my way down the hallway, closing the bedroom door. I can't move forward as much as I will myself to, and so I settle for stumbling backward, sliding down the door. Silent sobs fill my cupped hands, tears making seeing impossible, and soon I’m wrapped in Robert’s warm and safe embrace.
His hand runs over my head and down my back as I bury my face in his shoulder, fisting his T-shirt at his waist as he sets me in his lap.
“Hey, shhh. I’m right here. What’s going on?”
His voice is full of worry, but I can't form any words, tears continue to fall.
“Presley, what’s going on? Talk to me beautiful.”
*****
Presley is crying uncontrollably. Both Liv and Trey have managed to sneak into her room through the small opening I was able to give them by moving her away from the door.
“What’s going on? I heard Presley and her mom talking.” Trey sounds genuinely concerned.
“What did you do, Brice!” Liv is riled; her momma bear instincts are honed to Presley, and she’s ready for a fight. We can always count on Liv to have our backs, it doesn’t matter the situation, she’s loyal to a fault, as long as you stay on her good side.
“I didn’t do anything, honestly. She just came back and started crying.”
There’s a knock on the door and Mrs. D sticks her head in. “Robert, I need to talk to you.”
Guess we’re doing this now. Both Trey and Liv look at me, eyebrows raised, “Robert?” they say in unison, both of them looking confused as hell.
“Yes, ma’am. Be right there.” I move Presley off me, and she tightens her grip.
“Don’t go. Please don’t go.”
Who would have known I would go from being turned on by her begging, to feeling as if my heart had been ripped out of my chest? “I’ll be right back, Princess. I promise.”
I motion for Liv to sit with her, and she wraps her arms around her. “Hey, sweet girl. I don’t know what’s going on, but everything’s gonna be okay.”
Looking back at her one more time, Trey pats me on the shoulder. “We’ll take care of her.” I nod and follow Mrs. D out to the living room.
“Care to explain what’s going on?” My question came out far harsher than I ever intended it to be, but my girl is hurting, and I can't protect her from whatever it is. I’ve wanted to protect her before, but this level is new to me. I want to physically hurt the person causing her pain.
“Robert, it’s Presley’s father.”
Fuck me. I sink into the couch as a knot in my stomach begins to form. I remember this conversation. The one my mother had with me, when she told me he was dead. Please don’t let it be the same one.
“Robert, their unit disappeared about a month ago. Complete silence. A couple of days ago, one of the men was found dead. He was completely unrecognizable. They had to get a bone marrow sample to do a DNA test. It was the father of one of Presley’s friends. Her best friend after you, actually.”
I feel as if all the oxygen has been taken out of the room. “Does Presley know?”
“She knows he’s dead, it’s all I could bring myself to tell her.”
We sit in silence. Mrs. D is staring at a spot on the carpet, and I can tell she is trying to hold it all together. “Listen, Mrs. D, we both know that sometimes in cases like this, no news can be good news. Mr. D. is one of the smartest people I have ever met, and right now, he is using his intelligence to his advantage. He is a way better soldier and man than my father ever was. He’s gonna be back. He’s gonna surprise us all. We have to have faith.”
She nods her appreciation and then looks at me once more.
“I’m guessing by the looks on your friends’ faces they don’t know you by your real name. I’m sorry for letting it slip.”
“It’s okay. I was thinking of telling them soon anyway.” I shuffle in my seat before speaking up again. “Hey, Mrs. D, would it be okay if I stayed here until you hear something back?”
She looks at me and wrinkles her brow a little. Definitely not what I was expecting. Usually, it would be a resounding yes.
“I’ll have to discuss it with your mother. We both want you two to enjoy being kids. Don’t be in such a rush to grow into adults.”