“Yeah,” he says softly with a simple nod. “It’s a lot. I guess I didn’t expect this. I didn’t expect people to know who I am. Or I guess to not really know who I am.”
His words sting a little. Who I wrote into the book wasn’t really who he is in real life and now there’s this expectation thrust upon him to be all of it and more. To be the romanticized version I created and to impress people with who he is by being absolute perfection. No one can live up to that.
“I’m sorry. I guess I should’ve told you about how people responded to your character.” I shake my head, covering my face with my hands as this now all feels far more overwhelming than it was before we found each other.
“It’s exactly that. A character. That’s the part that’s hard to separate. I’m not the person in your book even if that character was based on me. People have expectations of me now, expectations I never even considered.”
Everything he’s saying is true and my heart begins to beat rapidly, my palms growing sweatier with each word he says. I never thought what I wrote would be seen by anyone, let alone become a bestseller, but here we are. I now need to deal with the ramifications of all of that. As much as writing has become part of my life and something I’ve longed for, and the reason Elliot and I found each other, it could ultimately be what drives us apart.
“I’ve learned to separate myself from it. The book is based on our story, but the female main character isn’t me and I know that. The public can take from it what they want and that’s something neither of us can control.” My words are quiet, but firmly rooted in my belief that while this book is mine, it doesn’t define my life.
“I guess it’s something I have to come to terms with,” Elliot responds, shrugging, but not looking at me.
I feel nauseous and out of control. I didn’t think it would be this hard, but that’s also because I created this little world and I’ve been living in it ever since.
Things are about to get far more real than either of us are prepared for.
Chapter Thirty-Three: Elliot
I thought I’d been prepared for this, but man was I wrong, and as we walk into Nora’s agent’s office, I once again have to fight the overwhelming urge to bolt. To run and get the hell out of here.
All morning, I’ve been psyching myself up for people finally discovering who I was and how we managed to find each other. I knew from how well Nora’s book had sold that people were invested in our story, hell I was invested in it, but I think I underestimated just how much everyone loved it.
Because as we sit here listening to Sara ramble on about how amazing it is that we found each other again and how great it is that the book coming out was the catalyst for that and how the timing for book two couldn’t be more perfect, I actually start to feel a little sick.
“So, we should definitely tee up something with the morning shows,” Sara says, clapping her hands once as she stares at both of us, a huge smile on her face.
“What?” I blurt out.
Nora turns to me, squeezing my hand, which is still in hers. “It’s okay,” she whispers, but really, I don’t think it is.
“We’ll have you both go on,” Sara continues, her words coming a mile a minute. “And you can talk all about your story and how you lost each other and then found each other after Nora’s book came out. Not to mention your future and how book two will tell that story. Ah, this is perfect, and I think we should also consider pitching it as a possible TV series, Netflix or something would be perfect for this!”
I shake my head, my brain a swirling mess of everything that’s just been said. They want to make a fucking TV show about our life?
“Wait,” I say, holding up a hand. I glance at Nora, who’s sitting beside me. I can tell she’s worried about where all this is going and what I’m about to say, even if she is excited by it all at the same time.
“Is there a problem?” Sara asks.
“Yeah,” I exhale. “This…this is our life,” I tell her.
“Exactly!”
“But it’s private.”
Sara shakes her head, still smiling at us. “No, not after the book dropped and especially not after you found her. Do you realize the marketing potential behind this? It’s off the charts.”
I stand, dropping Nora’s hand as I shove a rough one through my hair. My heart is racing inside my chest as I start to pace a little, trying to work out a nice way to say I don’t want any part of this without pissing off this woman or hurting Nora.
“Look, I just need some time,” I eventually say, hands up as I glance at Nora and then Sara. “This is obviously a lot for me to take in and I…I don’t know, I just need some time.”
Sara nods her head at me and for a second I think she’s going to give in. But then she turns to Nora and starts to speak. “We should definitely do another book tour, bigger this time and include the story of how you two were reunited. It would be great if Elliot could come along, I mean he’s certainly easy on the eye and you two make a gorgeous couple, so this is all…it’s just freaking perfect!”
I feel like my head’s about to explode and I know I need to get out of here before I say something I’m going to regret. “I need some air,” I blurt out, before turning and walking out of the office.
I make it all the way down to the street without anyone stopping me, stepping outside to inhale a big lungful of air as I force myself to try and stay calm. I knew Nora was semi-famous because of her story. It was an immediate best-seller and I was seriously proud of her for finally achieving her dream.
What I can’t cope with is having us, our relationship, as the sole focus of that dream. I hate the idea of people knowing everything about us, or being privy to our most private details, even if they are a fictionalized version of them.
“Elliot?”
I turn and see Nora standing at the building’s entrance, her arms crossed in front of her and a worried look on her face.
“Hey,” I breathe out.
She steps toward me. “I’m sorry.”
I reach for her, pulling her into my arms. She buries her face against my chest, her arms still wrapped around herself and we stand in silence for a few minutes as the noise of the city swirls around us.
“Are you okay?” she eventually asks, pulling back a little to meet my eyes.
“It’s just a little more intense than I expected,” I admit.
Nora nods. “I know, me too actually.”
I brush loose strands of hair from her face, tucking them behind her ear. “She’s a ball of energy, that agent of yours.”
Nora smiles a little. “Yeah, she really is. She’s probably the reason the book did so well in the first place, she just didn’t stop promoting it any chance she could get.”
I tilt my head at her. “Pretty sure your writing and your story were a big part of that success.”
Nora pushes up on her toes and brushes her lips against mine. “Our story,” she whispers.
I cup her face in my hands as my eyes search hers. “It is our story,” I agree. “And it’s precious to me, private.”
She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth as she stares back at me. “You really don’t want any part of this?”