The heat is on in here today, because it’s the end of February, and it feels every bit as such outside. But my clothing choice makes it hot too. A pair of sweatpants with a shirt and a hoodie, the hood covering my head.
Glancing down, I groan. I’m only at mile number three; I need to go five.
Especially if I want to make a spot on the Laurel Springs SWAT team.
That’s been my goal since I came up here with my sister. The five-mile run is the first obstacle I have to overcome if I want to even be considered. So far, it’s kicked my ass.
“Nice pace.”
Ransom hops onto the treadmill beside me, warming up by walking briskly.
“Thanks, I’m trying to get it where it needs to be.”
“It took me a while,” he admits. “I’m not a runner, but with Rambo, I kinda have to be. It wasn’t until I got partnered with him that I was even in good enough shape to try out for SWAT.”
I give him a side-eye. “Can’t believe you had to try out. Surprised you weren’t like grandfathered in, or something.”
“Nah, everybody has to get their spot the old-fashioned way here.”
It makes me respect him more. “Must be nerve-wracking though.”
“You ain’t kiddin’. None of us who have dads that have been on the PD want to go to them and admit defeat or failure.”
“That must be hard.”
“And embarrassing. We’re held to a higher level of standards than most other people. Which is understandable.”
I may act like I don’t know what he’s saying, but I do. It’s one of the reasons I left Paradise Lost. There, I would always be in the shadow of what my dad and brother have accomplished.
Here in Laurel Springs?
I can be me. Whoever the fuck that is.
“So,” Ransom continues as he picks up the pace, starting with a slow jog. “Saw your girl the other day, she came into The Café to get her morning coffee.”
“My girl?”
Everyone calls Shelby my girl, but I pretend not to be in on it.
“Yeah, you know who I’m talking about, don’t even act like you don’t. Everybody knows you’re eyeing Shelby and she’s eyeing you. When are you gonna make a move?”
“You’re one to talk.” I level him with a glare. “From what I heard it took Stella being in a pretty dangerous situation for you to ask her to go out with you.”
“Do as I say, not as I do.” He shrugs. “Besides we’re married now with a super cute kid and the best dog there ever was. So…I mean I feel like I did good. I really thought after you took her home from the Christmas party, something would have happened between the two of you.”
Fuck.
And I’m wearing sweatpants.
No one knows what did happen between us, especially Shelby. She’d passed out either before she came or after, I’m still not sure, and I haven’t been able to bring myself to ask. That night had been the most exhilarating and frustrating of my life. I swear I walked around with blue balls for fucking days.
“I took her home, made sure she was good, and went to my own apartment.”
It’s the lie I’ll tell til the day I die.
I don’t want anyone to think I took advantage of her, and nor her to be embarrassed. So I live with it, trying my best every day to figure out how to bring it up.
“Sure.” Ransom grins smugly. “You keep telling yourself that.”
My treadmill beeps, letting me know my five miles are done. Thank God. I don’t even do my cool down, I just hop off, saying some sort of goodbye to Ransom.
The last thing I need is to hear anymore love advice from him.
He’s married. With a kid. Everything you thought you’d have by now, my brain mocks me.
Shut up, I scream back.
My stride is long as I head to the locker room. Normally I’d take a shower and change, but right now, I need to get out of here. For some reason it feels as if the walls are closing in, and there’s nowhere for me to escape to. Going to my locker, I yank it open, grab my bag out, and make my getaway.
Once I’m in my Mustang, I hit the straight-stretch of highway next to the PD, and gun it, just to hear the roar of the engine. Something about this car always puts me in a better mood.
Hearing and feeling the power behind in palm of my hands is enough to center me and bring me down to earth.
My stomach growls causing me to look at my smartwatch. I burned over eight hundred calories, and I think I deserve some Café food.
Slowing down next to the downtown entrance, I signal a left-hand turn, looking for a parking spot. Everybody must be out and ready for lunch; everything in front of The Café is taken.
My eyes shift over to where Shelby’s law office is located. Her car is there, and I wonder if she’s had lunch yet.
Would I be out of line to ask her to join me? I hate eating alone, and I know she does too. Would she understand that I’m asking as more than a friend?
Probably not.
“Man the fuck up, Sullivan.”
That’s the problem. Last time I manned up and gave everything I had to a woman I thought I had a future with, she laughed at me.
Fucking laughed in my face.
Then turned around and got with my brother.
It hit my self-esteem hard, my self-image harder. Not the coolest thing for a man to admit to, but it’s taken me a while to recover from the blow.
Circling downtown, I finally find a spot almost as far away from The Café as I can get. Fuck it. I’ll take it. Within seconds I’m parked, and out, beeping the auto locks as I pull the hood of my hoodie back over my head, doing my best to block out the cool air.
We have a new roundabout, and I swear to Jesus, only two percent of the people know how to use it. I literally wait to walk across until no one is coming, although I have the right of way. Today is not the day I wanna die.
Sprinting across the pavement, I walk up onto the curb, right in front of Shelby’s office.
I’m arguing with myself, trying to figure out if I wanna bite the bullet and ask her to have lunch with me, when the decision is taken out of my hands. The door opens, and there she is.
The object of my jerk off sessions.
The star in all my erotic dreams.
Right there in the fuckin’ flesh.
She turns, catching sight of me as she does. “Oh my God, hey, Sully! I was just thinking about you.”
Her cheeks are bright and rosy. I’m unsure if it’s from the cool weather, or her thoughts. “Oh really? What were you thinking about me for?”
“Whitney is trying to figure out a good way to raise money for the LSERT, and one of the girls suggested an auction. I thought you’d be perfect for it. You’d probably fetch the most. You’re one of the city’s hottest bachelors.”
I don’t know whether to be flattered or offended.
“Y’all were talking about auctioning me off?”
“Yeah.” She grins. “Weren’t you saying something the other day about needing to meet new people?”
That’s not what I meant, and I’m pretty damn sure she knows it.
“Not necessarily in that way.” I scratch at my chin.
“It would be for a great cause,” she reminds me.
“I know, but I’ll have to think about it.”