Of all the nights I’ve spent at Berkeley, this is so far my favorite.
The place is filled with loud banter and music, and the beer is really good. Maybe too good because Chad convinced me to get a 42 ounce stein, which is an enormous beer, and I’m halfway done and feeling loopy. A good loopy though.
We might be at separate tables, but the eight of us are talking to each other, laughing, and having an awesome time.
“I’m on campus, and there’s always some loser protesting shit,” Matt says, adjusting his backward cap from his seat. “So, I went over to see what the deal was. As I got closer, I saw a sign that said, Free Hugs. Well, shit, I love hugs, especially coming from the good-looking blondes who were holding the signs. So, I walked with my arms open, right over to the girls, and this huge three-hundred-pound behemoth of a dude came swooping in, grabbed my skinny ass, and lifted me off the ground for the biggest fucking hug I’d ever had.”
Adam and Chad are in hysterics while Nathan asks, “Did you punch the guy in the face?”
Matt looks at him like he’s insane. “Fuck no. The guy could have clobbered me with his pinkie. And his hug was kinda nice. Plus, I did score some sweet points with those girls.”
Nathan and Matt fist-bump as Wes looks on, unimpressed, and asks, “You hook up with either of them?”
Matt turns sheepish. “Uh, no. Turns out, they were really into each other. I tried, but they were definitely not into a three-way with me.”
Amanda hits her forehead with her palm and shakes her head. “Why every straight guy thinks lesbians would love a three-way with them is beyond me.”
Adam looks at Amanda in amazement. “Are you a lesbian?”
She makes a face and gives him sass. “No. And if I were, it wouldn’t be any of your goddamn business.”
He lifts his hands into the air, as if he meant no foul, while Chad throws an arm around his shoulders and gives him a pat.
“Best not to mess with her, man. She’ll eat you alive.”
“Hell yeah, I will,” Amanda chants while Nicole gives her a high five across the table.
“Hey, Stacey,” Matt calls out to me. “What’s your deal? You dating anyone yet?”
I take a swig of my drink and shake my head. “Nope.”
He seems confused by my response. “Wait. You’ve been here how long, and you haven’t even hooked up?”
“I never said I haven’t hooked up with anyone,” my mouth says before my brain can process it. I blame the beer.
“No way. Who did you hook up with?” Nicole asks as Chad puts his hands over his ears in a mocking way.
“Don’t want to hear about my sister hooking up with anyone,” he says and looks to his baseball buddies. “I’d better not hear she hooked up with you dicks. Seriously, Stacey, if you do date anyone at school, don’t let it be these losers. I have too much dirt on them, and it’s all bad.” He points his beer to the four guys like it’s a threat.
“We don’t have to worry about Stacey. Squid only dates dweebs anyway,” Wes says from the far end of his table.
“Dweebs?” I ask mockingly. “The 1980s called, and they want their word back.”
“Connor Faughnan in the eighth grade,” Wes states, and Chad clinks glasses with him in agreement. “Dude had a retainer for his retainer.”
“He was sweet,” I defend.
“He also gave you a bouquet of daisies for Valentine’s Day and almost killed you because you’re allergic to them.”
I can’t argue with Wes on that one. He’s the one who had to run home and get my meds before my throat closed.
He continues, “Justin Koutrin, freshman year. Kid wore a fedora to school and walked around with a chocolate cigar.”
“He had style.”
“Kevin Heally, junior year. He made you look at his headshots every day and discuss the character he was playing in each pose.”
“He was famous in our school. Landed a commercial,” I explain to the girls.
“For hemorrhoids,” Wes adds, and I stick my tongue out at him.
“You’re right. I have horrible taste in men. Terrible really. I always go for the unattractive ones with no personality and zero consideration.” My comment goes over everyone’s head, except for Wes, who raises his brows in challenge while taking a long swig of his beer. “You know, I would have had more guys to date, but these two spoiled my chances.”
Nicole leans into my side. “I need to know some details about these two. What is something no one knows about them that they’ll kill you for saying?”
Chad levels his eyes at me. “Tread carefully, little sister.”
I playfully rub my hands together. “This is my chance for revenge. Okay, well, Chad used to write love letters to Ariana Grande. He was the local president of the Arianators fan club.”
Wes and Matt nod in understanding, mumbling things like, “She’s hot,” while Adam and Nathan are laughing along with the girls, who think it’s a mixture of adorable and embarrassing.
“And Wes …” I close one eye and try to think of what I want to say. “You know that tattoo he has on his arm? Well, when he first got it, it was a Chinese symbol he thought meant perseverance, but when we Googled it, we found out it really meant hot dogs.”
The table erupts with laughter, and he looks like he’s going to kill me.
“You really want to play, Stacey Marie?” he dares.
“Oh snap. It’s gonna get ugly!” Adam laughs as he pushes his shirtsleeves up.
I narrow my eyes at Wes in warning to be nice. He doesn’t seem to care as he gives a cocky grin and declares, “She used to kiss her pillow.”
“Stop it. That’s not true.”
Chad nods his head. “It’s true. We totally caught you one day.”
My mouth is open, like I’m trying to catch flies while I muster up the words to defend myself. “Whatever. Fine. I was practicing for the real thing.”
“Did it work? Was your first kiss any good?” Nathan wants to know.
I pause before answering. Not because I don’t remember the details of my first kiss. It’s because I remember them all too well.
“It was,” Wes says, and I blink up at him in surprise.
The gang turns to him in shock, including Chad, whose eyes are bugging out. “Wait. What?”
Wes and I stare at each other across the table, and I’m surprised to see he’s okay with discussing this in front of everyone.
Turning to Chad, I start, “I was in the seventh grade. You guys were in the eighth. It was at a party. We were playing Spin the Bottle. I don’t know where you were.”
“Upstairs, playing PlayStation,” Wes tells him.
Chad looks at Wes, utterly confused. “You were my sister’s first kiss?”
“I didn’t know I was her first until after. She told me in the closet.”
“In the closet!” Chad’s voice rises, which makes us all giggle and guffaw.
“It was the Seven Minutes in Heaven version of Spin the Bottle.” Wes’s face is covered in a smirk, like he’s thirteen again.
“If I had known, I would have socked you,” Chad says.