"With Santiago's crew?"
She finishes her drink and adds more to the glass. "Nope. Never met him until I got kidnapped." She sarcastically laughs while tears drip onto her thighs. "Torres was our drug lord. All for the good of the movement." She presses her hand to her forehead. "Forget I said anything. I shouldn't have. Please don't ask me about it or repeat what I said."
She knows.
"I know about the movement," I quietly say.
She shifts. "You do?"
I slowly nod my head.
"Then you know what they have planned?"
My stomach flips. "Yes."
"Some days, I just want to kill myself," she whispers.
"I know."
"You, too?"
"Yes." I admit.
She taps the glass in her hand. "I don't see the point anymore. Even out of the hands of Santiago and his men, what do I have that's left? A bunch of memories of what they all did to me? The looming fear of what's in store for me when they find me?" She takes several mouthfuls of rum. "I might as well take one of the guys' guns and end it on my terms."
"Don't say that," Hunter's voice booms behind us, and I jump. He sits down and quietly says, "Sorry, Flower."
Julieta finishes her drink and wipes her eyes. "Forget I said anything. I'm sleeping in that building." She rises and grabs the bottle of rum. "There are three guest bedrooms upstairs. Pick whatever one you want. Until the paperwork is filed, it's still my house." She scoffs, and more tears fall.
Hunter starts, "Julieta—"
"Please don't."
"I'm not going to forget you said that. You—"
"Please stop. I'm so tired of fighting and worrying, and... God, just everything. Please just stop." She sobs and trots away.
Hunter starts to get up, but I stop him.
"Let her be."
"She just talked about blowing her head off, and she's drinking, too. I can't just let her be."
"She doesn't have a gun on her. Just give her some space."
"You don't know if there's a gun in that building. What if she shoots herself?"
Ryker steps outside. "What are you talking about?"
We tell him what happened.
"Where is she?"
"That building."
He jumps off the step and runs to the building, shouting her name.
Hunter turns my chin toward him. "Why did you say you knew what she meant when she said she wanted to kill herself?"
I try to look away, but he won't let me. My pulse increases and my stomach flips. "I don't want to talk about it."
"No, we're going to. This isn't something you're going to sweep under the rug, Vanessa."
I close my eyes so I don't have to look at him. "I'm not talking about this with you."
"Why?"
"Drop it."
"No. Tell me."
"You won't understand it."
"Try me."
"Hunter," I moan and cover my face.
"I want you to explain."
"No, you don't."
"Yes, I do."
"I don't want to get into this."
"Why, Vanessa?"
"Because you don't know what it's like to live in a prison with no one coming to save you," I cry out.
"I came to save you. I would save you again."
"You were there because of Naomi and Emilia. If they hadn't been in that pit with us, we would all still be there. And I wasn't talking about that anyway."
"You mean the guerrillas?"
"No."
He tugs me close to him. "What were you talking about?"
Tears stream down my face. "I don't want to talk about this."
"Flower, I need to understand. If it wasn't Santiago or the guerrillas, then what prison are you referring to?"
"Nothing. It's not important."
"It is."
"Why are you pushing me on this?"
He drags me on his lap and puts his hand on my cheek. "What other prison were you in?"
My gut twists. "His."
"Carlos?"
I shudder at his name. "Yes."
Hunter's eyes turn to slits. "He locked you up?"
"No. He didn't have to. It was an internal prison."
"What does that mean?"
"Every move I made, I had to consider carefully, and when I didn't choose correctly..." My heart races faster.
Hunter softly asks, "Why didn't you tell your family or friends what was going on?"
I sarcastically laugh. "I don't have any left."
"Why? What happened?" Hunter gently pushes.
"Carlos made sure everyone I ever loved was out of my life."
"Didn't people see your injuries?"
I snort and take another chug of rum. "Everyone in his house knew. No one cared. And they tricked me."
Hunter takes my drink and sets it next to him, an arm's length away. "How?"
"He had spies. When I confided in one who pretended to befriend me..." I turn away, not able to finish, remembering the beating I took that landed me in the hospital for a week with a concussion and internal bleeding that almost killed me.
Hunter pulls me as close as possible to him.
I'm shaking again. I wish I could not physically react anytime I have a flashback or memory pop up, but I'm not sure how to prevent it.
"Everyone in his house knew the prison I lived in. But outside, we were the perfect couple. Anyone who had ever been part of my life was gone. An internal prison is something you never escape. It spins in your mind all day and all night. So, yeah, there are many times I thought it would be easier just to end it all."
He firmly holds my cheeks. "Don't ever do that."
More tears fall. "If I ever went back to him, I would. It would be better than suffering in silence."
"No, Flower. I would come rescue you."
"You can't. He has a fortress and an army surrounding it."
"Doesn't matter. I would save you, and he would be dead."
I sniffle. "I used to sit on the balcony and look out into the jungle, wondering if anyone could see me and help me. But no one could."
His eyes drill into mine. "I would, Flower. Every day and night, I would watch you, planning the perfect time to execute my mission. You might not see me, but I would be there, watching you."
I run my hand through his hair. "That's a nice thought."
"It's not a thought. It's a fact. But you don't have to worry about that. You're never going back to him." He sounds so definite I wonder if it's possible.
I open my mouth but snap it shut.
"What?"
"I... I have premonitions."
"What do you mean?"
"I should say nightmares." The hole in my stomach gets bigger.
"Tell me about them, Flower."
A jaguar howls in the distance and I jump.
He draws me closer and strokes my cheek. "Please tell me."
"I... I'm in a wedding dress, and we're in a church. All the important politicians and their wives are there. People from other countries, too. I have to say yes. I'm trying to do it so Carlos and no one else notices that I don't want to, but I almost pass out from the panic."