Paige had spent the entire conversation walking the fine line between laughter and tears, but his smile and lighthearted words tipped the scales. “I wasn’t going to say a word,” she said, matching his grin with one of her own.
Lucas grew serious again. “What I meant is not every man is a weasel who is going to betray you.” He reached up and stroked her cheek with his fingertips. It was the simplest gesture, barely anything at all, and yet every inch of her awoke from his touch. “And believe it or not, not every man would expect you to sacrifice who you are simply because you love him.”
She looked at him, and for the first time, she realized that it wasn’t only grief that was holding him back. Paige wasn’t the only one who’d been too scared to try again.
“And not every woman will leave you either, Lucas.”
“Maybe we both need to let our guard down just a little.”
He leaned forward and touched his lips against hers. Paige wanted to reach for him, to pull him closer, while at the same time still wanting to push him away. That was the safe thing to do, to end this before it began, before he had a chance to break her fragile heart. But Lucas didn’t go anywhere. He stayed right where he was, his hand cupping her jaw as he teased her with featherlight kisses until her breathing turned shallow and her skin grew hot. Too hot. Like every inch of her was on fire and relief could only be found in his touch.
“Are you okay?” he asked when she shivered beneath his hand.
“I feel…so vulnerable.”
His lips brushed hers yet again, but he said nothing. Instead he waited for her to find the words in her own time.
“It’s scary.” Such a simple statement, and yet so hard to admit.
“It doesn’t have to be,” he said.
“But what if—”
“What if it’s fabulous?”
“That would make it even worse.”
“It’s a chance I’m willing to take,” he said. And so was she. Because instead of pushing Lucas away, Paige reached for him, her hand on the back of his neck as she drew him closer. But it wasn’t enough. She needed to feel his touch on her skin and the weight of his body on hers, moving together until they were lost to everything but each other.
Lowering them to the rug, Lucas rolled her beneath him, pressing against her soft flesh right where she needed it most. “I want you, Paige.” He reared back to look at her, his voice tight with a barely leashed restraint. “But only if you’re sure.”
Paige placed her hand on his chest and felt his heart pounding beneath her palm. She stared up at him, his eyes glittering in the warm glow of the fire, and all of the doubts and fears of the last three years vanished.
“I’m sure,” she whispered in reply. With Lucas there was no promise of a future—no next year, next month, or even next week. There was only the here and now with a man who not only understood her but cherished her, even if only for one night.
Chapter 18
A smile spread across Paige’s face as the first hint of consciousness seeped into her mind. Without opening her eyes, she slid her hand across the cool sheets to find…
Nothing.
Her eyes popped open. Lucas was nowhere to be found.
She sat up in bed and the sheet pooled in her lap. Last night had been… Paige searched for the right word. Every adjective that came to mind sounded so clichéd—amazing, magical, life-affirming—yet that’s exactly how it felt. They’d spent hours lost in each other, and when they’d finally collapsed against the mattress, Lucas hadn’t run off. He’d stayed right where he was, holding her in his arms until they both fell asleep. It had felt natural. It had felt right. And not one ounce of her was afraid he would wake in the morning and catch sight of something that would send him running for his life.
So where was he now?
She looked through the large bay window. The sun was much higher than it was when she usually woke. Maybe Lucas wasn’t the type to sleep in, even if they had been up until nearly dawn. A sense of unease filled her belly as another thought crept, unwelcome, into her mind. What if the sunrise had brought a sobering regret? What if he wasn’t as ready to move on as he thought? Then again, maybe he just needed some time to process. This was all new to him. Not that Paige had any idea what “this” was exactly. It didn’t feel like a one-night stand. A vacation fling maybe? But weren’t they too old for that?
She hashed over the options as she got dressed, but ultimately Paige decided not to analyze the situation to death and instead just try to enjoy it for what it was. Whatever that might be. She hadn’t come to the island to fall for a hotter-than-hell innkeeper. And despite her assistant’s hopes to the contrary, she hadn’t even come looking for a fling. This trip was about celebrating her single life. Whatever she’d found with Lucas, she hadn’t been looking for it. And yet there she was. Which was why she decided that, for once in her life, she just needed to go with the flow.
By the time she reached the stairs, she was nearly convinced. That is, until she made it to the kitchen to find Lucas sitting at the island, hunched over his laptop with a distraught look on his face. Then every fear and insecurity came rushing back to her, along with the reminder of why she’d given up men in the first place.
Don’t assume the worst, she chanted to herself. Whatever had him so stressed out might have absolutely nothing to do with her or the night they’d just spent together. She was debating whether or not to ask, when he looked up from the screen.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hey.” Well, that wasn’t awkward at all.
“Sorry you woke up alone. I couldn’t sleep, and once I’m up…”
“No, I totally get it.” Her teeth sank into her bottom lip.
Mind your own business, she heard Sammy McGuire say.
But Lucas looked so distraught…
“Everything alright?” The moment the words left her mouth, she regretted asking them. Don’t chase bad news, her grandmother always used to say. But instead of listening to her, or the cartoon version of her assistant, Paige had charged full speed ahead toward an answer she was, in all likelihood, not going to like.
“What? Oh yeah, fine,” he said, his focus returning to whatever was on his laptop screen. “Just have a lot on my mind.” An uncomfortable moment passed before he added, “Give me a second, and I’ll get breakfast started.”
Paige shoved her hands into the pockets of her sweatshirt. She’d opted for casual, dressing in a pair of yoga pants and her favorite Northwestern hoodie, but now she wanted nothing more than to be wearing her power suit and her favorite pair of impractical heels. She felt like she could conquer the world in that outfit. It was what she wore to her most important meetings. Her battle armor, so to speak. And in that moment, she could have really used a steel barrier between Lucas Croft and her fragile heart.