Once the crackers were consumed, I continued my wait. When the nausea didn’t return, I removed my robe, revealing the camisole and shorts I’d worn to bed.
As I crawled to my side of the bed, the springs squeaked, echoing off the walls. I slid under the covers, and curled closer to Patrick. Even in his sleep, he wrapped his arm around my shoulder, tugging me against his warm chest.
“Maddie girl, you’re cold.” His voice was thick with slumber as he ran his warm hand over my bare shoulder.
“Go back to sleep. It’s too early.”
Lips came to my forehead. “Did you have a bad dream?”
That had been a problem when we first met. I’d wake in the middle of the night in a complete state of terror. Imagined images of my parents after their car crash. Rats and bugs crawling over them and me. Faceless people threatening. There was never an actual abduction or assault. I would wake just in time.
I hadn’t realized how vivid the dreams were until I moved into the hole in the wall with Patrick. He’d wake me as I thrashed and screamed, lulling me back to sleep with promises of fighting my demons.
“No,” I replied.
His head lifted from the pillow as his eyes blinked away the sleep. “Are you okay?”
I reached across his toned abdomen and settled against his shoulder. “I am. I really am.”
Laying his head back down, he sighed, still holding me close.
There were still a few hours to wait before it was time to wake. With the rhythmic sounds of his breaths as a backdrop, I drifted into a blissful sleep. Dreams weren’t as vivid when they were happy. It wasn’t actual scenes I saw or experienced but a feeling.
Warmth.
Safety.
Happiness.
It was so close.
The alarm clock on the bookcase squealed. Patrick jumped from the bed and silenced the noise.
“You always do that so fast. Have you ever heard of snooze?” I asked.
“I don’t want it to wake anyone else.” He sat on the edge of the bed. “Next week, Pastor Roberto is going to let me take a crew. It will only be two other guys, but he said I’ll be in charge.”
I smiled up at him, taking in his messed hair and shining smile. “I love you.”
He leaned down and planted a kiss on my forehead. “You know I love you too.”
I nodded.
“We’re going to do this, Maddie. You and me. We’re going to make it.”
“You and me.” And baby. The words were on the tip of my tongue.
Today was my appointment with the people Kristine knew. Maybe tonight I would be able to tell Patrick. Then again, maybe I wasn’t pregnant. I wasn’t certain why that possibility made me sad. If I was, we were in for big changes.
“What if things change?” I asked.
“Things always change.” His lips curled upward. “That hasn’t stopped us before.”
I inhaled and stretched upon the warm sheets.
He was right.
Patrick
Present day
Opening the door, I was met with a dark stare. I’d known Sparrow long enough to know his body language. Without his saying a word, I knew he was upset, something he rarely showed. Whatever had happened or he’d learned had him even more upset than he was earlier, or perhaps it wasn’t something new but the accumulation of recent events.
With a quick glance over my shoulder, I confirmed Madeline’s state of undress. Stepping into the hallway, I closed the door behind me.
“Anything?” he asked.
“I haven’t heard from Garrett about her clothing, but on her? No.”
“You’re sure?”
“Are you asking if I thoroughly searched or if I would lie to you?”
His head shook. “Garrett came to me. The platinum bracelet was transmitting, audio and location.”
I sucked in a breath. “Fuck.”
“The office is clean. She didn’t plant anything in there. The fucking bracelet was enough. Ivanov heard or has recorded every damn word upstairs and anything since. The guard said he never heard her speaking while she was alone, but she could have been. She could have been relaying every goddamned move.”
“What about Ivanov?”
“He still hasn’t taken off. Hillman neither.”
“What are they waiting for?” I asked.
“If Ivanov didn’t know about your relationship with Ms. Miller, he does now. That’s a fucking jackpot when trying to infiltrate the Sparrow outfit.”
“She’s not trying...” I didn’t finish. “This is his war, not hers.”
Sparrow stood taller. “Start thinking like the man I know, the one who uses his brain, not his dick.”
My neck straightened.
“We can’t risk this,” Sparrow went on. “I won’t risk this. Ivanov is probably waiting for you to take her to our headquarters. That fucking bracelet would have led him there. She’s a liability and if you were thinking straight, you’d agree.”
She wasn’t a liability. She was my wife—the mother of my daughter.
“I won’t lead him there; I’ll lead him somewhere else.”
“What?” Sparrow asked.
“Give me the damn bracelet. I’ll lead him away from here. I don’t want that monster around the other women any more than I want him near Madeline or Ruby.”
Sparrow’s large hand raked through his dark hair. “Does she exist?”
I pulled Madeline’s phone from the inner pocket of my suit coat. “I was about to find out.”
“We’re at war and you want to abandon the outfit—us. Where do you plan to go?” He turned a circle. “You’re...important to us.”
“You have Mason.”
“Fuck, you aren’t interchangeable. That’s not how this works.”
I nodded as the lump in my throat grew larger. “Maybe not, but he’s capable of doing whatever I do.”
“Fuck no.” His jaw clenched and unclenched. “You...” It wasn’t easy for Sparrow to say whatever he was about to say. “...are the fucking voice of reason, usually,” he clarified. “Mason is good. No, he’s fantastic at what he does, but he’s also more volatile.”
He was right under usual circumstances. These weren’t usual and I wasn’t even close to being the voice of reason. “Sparrow, listen to me. You, Reid, and I ran this outfit. Hell, we took over the outfit with the three of us. I will come back. I’m not leaving you. I’m leading the Ivanov bratva away from here and away from the people I care about. That is reason. In the process, I plan to save my daughter from their clutches.”
“Alone?”
I could take a handful of capos with me. Doing so would leave Sparrow with fewer men. “I won’t take any men away from the war we have happening here. You need every single one. It’s bad enough I’m taking me away.”
“Take Garrett and two others. You can use whatever plane—whatever resources—you need or want. And here’s what you’re going to do.” He inhaled as his nostrils flared. “You are going to take her.” He nodded toward the door. “You’re going to go somewhere not associated with us, not my cabin or Mason’s. Those places are our safe houses. I don’t want the Ivanov bratva to know they exist.”