Her brow wrinkled, and I leaned forward, gently kissing the lines just because I could. Because she loved me.
“By the time you were old enough for kissing, I was a senior in high school, and I didn’t want to take the chance that you didn’t want me.”
“I always wanted you,” she argued.
“And I probably knew it, if I’d just thought about it hard enough. But I wasn’t just scared that you’d reject me. I was scared that you wouldn’t. That I’d hurt you like I did everyone else. That the town would turn on you.”
“I don’t care about the town’s opinion, and you’d never hurt me.” She shivered, and I brought us to the edge of the ledge, then lowered us so she was immersed in the water while she wrapped her arms around my neck.
“Hurt you physically? Never. But I wasn’t the most trustworthy with your emotions, and the thought of ruining you?” I shook my head. “Besides, I was leaving for college. What was I going to do? Leave you brokenhearted and lonely? How selfish would that have been?”
“I was anyway.”
I kissed her lips, letting the touch soften the memories, trying to trust that this was real and not some fucked-up dream I’d wake from. “Our timing was off. It was always off.”
She grinned. “You’re saying you couldn’t find the pika.”
I laughed, and it felt great. God, to have her in my arms, to kiss her, to laugh with her. It was beyond my wildest dreams.
“Right. I knew how to sit quietly with you. I knew how to be patient, and that’s why I knew the timing wasn’t right. Then you were kissing Sullivan, and I realized the time had passed and I hadn’t been brave enough to grab it. Five minutes, Willow.”
“And this all goes back to you not wanting to take me back to my house because…” She kissed my jaw, and a little of my resolve drifted away with the steam.
“Are you scared you’ll change your mind? Or I will? Is that why you’re rushing?” I asked.
“No, I’m rushing because I’ve wanted you for so long that I’m about ready to combust with it, and if we’re finally on the same page, I’m done wasting time.” She nibbled my ear.
Shit, her reasoning was sound. But so was mine.
“I’m not rushing,” I said, tipping her chin up so I could see her eyes. “Because our timing is right for the first time in our lives. I’m not rushing through something I’ve wanted my whole life just for instant gratification. I’m going to savor every single step I get to take with you. I’m going to date the hell out of you, Willow Bradley.”
She grinned. “Dating, huh?”
“Yeah. I’ve messed up just about everything in my life, but this?” I kissed her gently. “This, I’m going to get right.”
So help me God, I was not going to screw this up.
Chapter Seventeen
Willow
The doorbell rang, and my heart leaped, just like it had the last three times Cam had picked me up for a date. The last three and a half weeks, he’d taken me to dinner down in Buena Vista and a traveling art show in Salida and held my hand as we hiked the trail that led up to the falls, where I lay with my head in his lap as he read to me.
The snowpack had melted pretty much everywhere but the shaded patches, and I couldn’t help but sigh like a lovesick teenage girl when I thought about Cam’s defenses melting right along with the snow.
“Got it!” Rose called out, already at the door.
“Hi there, Rose. How’s it going?”
Cam’s voice slid over me like sun-warmed silk, and I walked out of the kitchen to find him crouched down just inside the living room, talking to my niece.
“Hi.” Awesome. My voice was all breathy and awkward.
“Hey, Pika,” he replied with a wink.
Hate to break it to Mrs. Barstrom, my freshman biology teacher, but she was wrong. That wink right there was how babies were made.
“So it made me think of you!” Rose finished saying as I shook my head free of the Cam-induced fog. She handed him a black T-shirt with a toothy grin.
“Oh yeah? You really bought it for me?” he asked, holding the T-shirt out in front of him to inspect it. “Wow, that’s amazing! Thanks, Rose!”
“You like it?” she asked, hopping on her toes.
“Love it!” He turned it around to show me.
I bit my lip to keep from laughing at the glittery unicorn that adorned the front of the shirt.
“I saw it when I was shopping with Mom, and she said I could get it for you,” Rose finished with a nod.
“Well, that was really nice of your mom.” Cam stood to his full height and unzipped his black jacket. “You know, I can’t remember the last time a girl gave me a present.”
That gave me pause. He’d been pretty open about his past over the last few weeks. Of course there had been women, just like I’d dated a handful of guys. And I knew he kept his relationships brief, but none of them had given him a gift?
He dropped his jacket on my couch, and I picked it up, holding it to my chest as he pulled the T-shirt over his long-sleeve Henley and straightened it out.
“What do you think?” he asked Rose, spreading his arms wide.
I buried my nose in his coat to keep my laugh under wraps. It smelled just like him, all mint and pine.
He wasn’t fooled, cocking an eyebrow at me as I tried to stop my shoulders from shaking.
“It’s perfect,” Rose declared.
“I think you chose perfectly. Thank you.” He bowed his head to her like he was a knight with a princess, and I fell in love with him all over again.
How easily those words slipped through my mind now that I’d admitted them out loud. I would have thought I’d feel weird or insecure, having said them when Cam hadn’t, but instead the words were incredibly freeing.
“Rose, why don’t you grab your coat so we can get going?” I suggested.
“Okay!” She bounced down the hallway to the guest room, her braid swinging behind her.
“Thank you for being so easy about this,” I said as Cam closed the distance between us.
“It’s no problem,” he promised, tilting my chin up with his thumb.
“I just promised Charity that she could finally get a weekend with her boyfriend, and then Rose’s dad didn’t show.” I dropped that last part to a whisper so Rose wouldn’t hear.
“Willow, it’s no problem,” he repeated, then brushed a kiss across my lips. “We could probably use a chaperone anyway.”