“Carlotta.” Lemon presses her hand to her chest. “It sounds as if Jimmy was treating you like a princess!”
Carlotta scoffs. “You say princess, I say prostitute. We all know what you wanted, Jimmy.”
The mobster straightens. “You were giving it to Lazzari for free.”
“Because he was honest,” Carlotta hisses, and I have feeling she’s not going to do a lot to help my case.
Noah groans as he thumps his fingers over the table. “Jimmy, between you, me, and the wind, Judge Baxter here wasn’t to blame.”
“It was me,” Lemon blurts the words out before Noah or I can protest. “It was all my idea. You see”—she winces—“I guess you could say I had a sneaking suspicion that Florenza wasn’t going to be so hot in the casket they were trying to push off on her, or the hairstyle, or the dress they were planning.”
“Who’s they?” Jimmy tips his head to the side, suddenly interested in the nuts and bolts of this nutty conversation—even if it is the truth.
Carlotta waves Lemon off. “Don’t listen to my Lot Lot. She’s got a baby munching on her brain. She’s getting all the facts mixed up. Angel Face’s ghost was talking to me about how she couldn’t stand the thought of being shoved into a cheap, gaudy casket. She wanted something top-of-the-line. And those so-called friends of hers that were planning her last look under the sun? They were gunning to make her look like a clown in that casket—that cheap casket. Flo wanted nothing but the best for her big sendoff, and I made sure she got it. Flo was thrilled how it turned out when all was said and done. Casket? Hair? Clothes? And even the venue where her big to-do was held was all hand-selected by your feisty niece. She wouldn’t let up one bit until I met every last one of her demands. And you know I’m not strong enough to carry a body out of the morgue in the middle of the afternoon, let alone at midnight. I needed to enlist Mr. Sexy Muscles over there. Flo was all wrapped up in a body bag. Sexy didn’t know who or what he was stealing. All he knew was that I needed a hand, and he was right there to give it.”
Jimmy jerks his head my way. “This true, Judge Baxter?”
“More or less,” I tell him.
His chin bobs back and forth. “So you’re a true-blue loyal friend to Cadillac here, aren’t you?”
Carlotta gives a spastic nod. “He’s my ride or die, Jimmy. I don’t know why he’d move heaven and earth, and a dead body or two for me, but he’s proven himself faithful to me time and time again.”
“I know why.” Jimmy shoots me a look that could slit my throat before he takes up Carlotta’s hand and kisses it. “Because no man, no matter how rich or powerful, could resist your charm. And neither can I.” He swings his eyes back my way. “You really stepped up for this beautiful creature. I commend you for that.”
“Oh, thank God.” Lemon lets out a breath she was holding. “For a second there, I thought you were going to kill him.”
“I am.” Jimmy shrugs. “But I’ll give you the mercy of letting it come as a surprise. There’s nothing worse than listening to a man beg for his life right before he meets his maker. Don’t worry, Judge Baxter. Because of your loyalty to Cadillac, I’ll be loyal to you. I’ll make sure it’s quick—a shot to the heart.”
A croaking sound emits from Lemon.
Noah wraps his arm around her. “That’s not happening, Lot.” He growls over at Jimmy, “Nobody’s going down with a shot to the heart. Look, your niece was dead. He didn’t kill her. But Lottie here? She brought your niece’s killer to justice. She caught and apprehended them herself. You should be thanking her, not threatening to gun down her husband. The two of them are having a baby. And a baby needs its father.”
The muscles in Noah’s jaw pinch tightly. And I’m pretty sure it has something to do with the fact he momentarily took himself out of the running as that baby’s father. It’s more or less a first. Noah has been walking around with a proverbial bullhorn, shouting from the rooftops that the baby Lemon is carrying is his.
I’m impressed with how far he’s willing to take this charade.
Jimmy takes a breath and shifts in his seat as he examines Lemon.
“A kid, huh?” He nods to Noah. “When Judge B gets pushed out of the way, would you mind stepping in and giving that kid the father it deserves?”
Noah inches back. “That’s not the point.”
“Yes or no?” Jimmy thunders.
“Yes,” Noah says with an incredulous look on his face. “Of course, I would. In fact, I plan on being there for it anyway, but that’s not what this is about. Look, you’re not killing the judge. And if you do, I’ve got a weapon, Jimmy. I know everything about you and this dicey club you run, and every illegal shtick you’ve got going on behind the scenes. You will not get away with killing that man. It’s not happening on my watch. You will pay, and I’ll be the one there to collect.”
Jimmy’s jaw moves side to side. “So you’re saying I need to kill you first.”
Lemon tosses her hands in the air. “Oh, for Pete’s sake.”
“Nothing’s happening to Noah.” I pull her in, land a kiss to the top of her head, and steal a moment to take in the scent of vanilla clinging to her. Breaks my heart that I couldn’t promise her that nothing was happening to me. “I’m the one you want, Jimmy. I don’t have a single good defense for my actions. Not one way to build reasonable doubt in your mind. I did what I did. Guilty as charged.”
Jimmy purses his lips as he examines me. “You manned up. I like that. You got a good one here, Carlotta Junior.”
Lemon closes her eyes a moment. “Well, if you don’t mind, I’d like to keep him. I’ve got news for you, Jimmy.” She says his name with a bite of attitude, and I can feel the temperature go up in the room. “If you harm one hair on either of these men, you are going to have the wrath of God all over you, and I will be the instrument that delivers it. You think your little turf war with the Lazzaris is getting unmanageable? I’m going to make that look like a cakewalk. You will rue the day you ever thought to pull a trigger on either of them. And I won’t make it easy on you, Jimmy. I’m not going to romance you with the thoughts of a shot to the heart. I’m going for something with flair. And guess what?” She leans forward as much as that baby in her belly will allow. “I’ll make sure you suffer. Just know this, you will never know the level of hell you’ll plunge my child and me into if you take away its father. You wouldn’t do that to us, would you?” She cradles her belly with her arms. “You’re not heartless, are you?” Her chest pulsates as she looks his way. “But if anything happens to either of them, I’ll know exactly how heartless you can be.”
Carlotta sniffs back tears. “That’s enough with the dramatics, Lot Lot. Foxy, why don’t you take her to the bar and buy her a stiff one?”
“Carlotta.” Lemon’s voice pitches.
“All right, make it a virgin.” Carlotta motions for them to leave and Noah eventually gets Lemon to step away as he navigates her to the bar. “Now let’s talk dirty.” She pulls Jimmy in by the tie and I cringe to see her do it. “How about a pound of flesh in exchange for Sexy’s life?”