He thumps his clenched fist on the table. Glasses and silverware rattle. “Not in this house!” he roars. “Over my dead body will you embarrass our family like this.”
That could always be arranged.
“It’s not up to you,” I coolly reply, taking a sip of my water. Out of the corner of my eye, I spy Mom jumping up, stopping the maids from delivering dessert.
“How far along are you?” Serena asks, smiling softly at me. Apart from Mom, she’s the only one not looking at me like she wants to stab a fork in my uterus.
“Thirteen weeks.” I visited my ob-gyn yesterday and she explained how they count the forty-week gestation from the date of my last period.
“There is still time to get an abortion,” Father barks, and I see red.
Esme uttered those exact same words to me, and we had an almighty argument. I know she believes she’s helping by bringing up all my options, but she can’t project her opinions on me because of what happened to her sister. She knows me well enough to know I would never do that, so she should have kept her mouth shut. She didn’t appreciate me telling her that, and the conversation rapidly deteriorated. I ended up stomping off, and I’m still not speaking to her.
“Maybe you are hard of hearing,” I say in a clipped tone. “Because I clearly told you I’m keeping my baby.” I place my hands protectively on my stomach, grateful the baby isn’t privy to this conversation. “That’s nonnegotiable.” Everything is. Which he will learn in due course.
Father’s nostrils flare, and his fists are clenched on top of the table. I’ve seen him mad plenty of times before, but I’ve never seen him look at me like he wants to murder me.
Unease trickles up my spine, but I hold my ground, keeping my chin raised defiantly.
A muscle pops in his jaw as he addresses me again. “If you insist on this madness, then I insist the father marries you.”
Yeah. I figured that one was coming. Even if I didn’t need to keep Ben’s name a secret, I would be doing it for this very reason. “I don’t know who he is,” I lie, shrugging because I know how much this is going to enrage him. “He was just some random hookup my birthday weekend in Vegas.” I wet my lips, praying I won’t go to hell for this. “I didn’t even get his name. I was too busy fucking his monster cock to form a coherent sentence.”
Mom rips me from my chair, dragging me back to safety as my father roars, jumping up and shoving the table over. It crashes to the ground with a large thud. Glass shatters, and water seeps onto the floor from the broken vase, flowers flying across the room along with silverware.
“Are you happy now, you little slut?” Saskia’s hateful face materializes in front of me, and it’s all I see before I feel the stinging pain lance across my cheek.
“Saskia!” Mom hollers, pulling me away from my sister. “Don’t you dare hit your pregnant sister!”
I rub my sore cheek in a daze, too startled at the sight of Alfred and Felix frantically whispering in my father’s ear, their words seemingly the only thing holding him back. He’s ready to throttle me, and the only thing stopping him are my two brothers-in-law.
“How could you be so reckless, you fool!” Saskia yells, invading my personal space again. “If you insist on acting like a common whore, you could at least make them wear condoms. Have you no self-respect at all?”
“I was on the pill!” I retaliate.
“No single method of contraception is one hundred percent reliable, and what about STDs?” She rakes her gaze up and down my body with derision. “You’re probably riddled.” She glances over her shoulder at our father. “If you thought finding a man to take her off your hands was a problem before, you can forget about it now. No decent man wants used goods. You should cut her loose. She doesn’t deserve to bear the Lawson name.”
I see the renewed flint in her eyes when she refocuses on me. “How many guys have you let into your saggy cunt?” She prods my chest with one bony finger. “How many degenerates did you let fuck you in Vegas?”
“Hundreds,” I hiss, just to piss her off. “I spent the entire weekend flat on my back.” I return her derogatory glare with one of my own. “Jealous you’re tied to one dick for life?” While I don’t think Saskia’s marriage is a happy one, she is stuck with Felix because it’s clear Father would never tolerate a divorce. Appearances mean everything to him, and having a divorcée for a daughter is almost as bad as my single mother status.
Saskia moves to slap me again, and I grab her wrist, ready to inflict pain if she dares lift a finger to me. “I’m not some little kid you can bully anymore. I put up with enough of your shit growing up, and you don’t get to take your anger out on me. You made your own life choices. Deal with it.” Her entire body vibrates with barely concealed rage as I release my hold on her, pinning her with a challenging look. “Hit me and I’ll hit you back ten times harder.”
“That’s enough.” Father’s rageful boom carries across the room. Jabbing his finger in the air, he glares at me. “Is this connected to Tony’s disappearance?”
He grilled me last weekend when Tony’s MIA status became obvious. I smirk. “Supposedly, you’re a smart man. You figure it out.” My spine stiffens, and my jaw tenses as he stalks toward me.
“You need to get out of here,” Mom whispers in my ear, and I feel her trembling against me.
He grips my chin, digging his nails into my skin, but I refuse to show any emotion. “Where is Tony?” he hisses, spittle flying from his lips, hitting me in the face.
“I don’t know,” I truthfully reply. He’s long gone from New York by now, I’m sure.
He slaps me, and the sting of his hand on my cheek is far harsher than my sister’s efforts. “Don’t you lie to me.” He raises his hand again, but Mom intervenes, yanking me behind her. Father’s nails draw blood on my chin as I’m dragged away from him.
“I know you’re angry, Joseph, but you can’t hit her. I won’t allow it.”
“Saskia is right,” he fumes. “This is all your fault, Georgia. You were always too lenient on her. I let you pander to her whims to keep the peace, but it was a mistake.”
“It isn’t fair!” Saskia cries, and I drag my gaze from my father, almost keeling over at the sight of my sister with tears streaming down her face. I have never seen Saskia cry. Never.
“Darling.” Felix comes up behind his wife, wrapping his arms around her. I expect Saskia to push him away, like she does the rare times he indulges in PDAs, but she turns in his arms, sobbing into his chest.
“How is it my slut of a sister can get pregnant without even trying and I can’t?”
Her words are muffled against his chest but clear enough to be heard. I’m guessing that was the intent. I am done with her calling me a slut. At twenty-one, I have had sex with three men. That’s hardly whore-worthy.
I’m so mad at her I’m tempted to tell her it’s Ben, just to see the look on her face. But this isn’t about me anymore, and I have a child to protect. The thought is sobering.
I’m not religious, despite being raised in a Catholic household and forced to attend church every Sunday until I turned eighteen and put my foot down. But I have wondered if Saskia has ever considered why God isn’t blessing her with a baby. My guess is he doesn’t want to inflict that kind of suffering on any innocent child. I don’t even know why Saskia wants to be a mom so badly. She’s self-centered and absorbed in her career and her busy life, and I can’t see her sacrificing her lifestyle for a child. My sister is the type to give birth and immediately pass the child to a nanny to raise.