“My house isn’t fancy,” she argued.
“I like your place,” he said. “It looks like you, and it smells like you. And I happen to love how you smell.” He kissed her hand. “My trailer, on the other hand, is a hole in the wall that came furnished from the prior Hotzone owners. I haven’t bothered to do anything with it, because, once the Hotzone is past the new-business bumps, I plan to get something else. But I’ve spent more time in this hole the past two months than I’ve spent in one place in ten years. That makes it a castle.” He paused at his door and pulled it open, before waving her forward. “So welcome to my castle.”
Shay walked up the stairs and entered. Caleb shut the door and locked it, thinking they’d had enough surprises for one day. He turned to find Shay standing at the bar that separated the living area from a compact kitchen, holding a photo he had displayed of him and six other Aces in front of a plane.
He walked up beside her, and she glanced up at him. “Tell me about the man in this photo,” she said, looking up at him. “Which one?”
“You,” she said. “I want to know about you. About the man you were then.”
“I was the same man I am now.”
“I want to know who that is,” she said, “because I know you saw things and did things. Hard, horrible things that have to haunt you. Yet you stayed ten years.”
How did he explain the switch he could turn on and off, that allowed him to become a soldier separate from the man? The switch that kept him sane. “Most of my missions were top secret,” he said. “I can’t talk about them. But even if I could tell you, you don’t want to hear about it, any more than I would want to remember.”
“Then why keep doing it for ten years?”
“Someone has to do the ugly stuff,” he said.
“But everyone doesn’t decide it has to be them.”
“I’m not the kind of guy who can go to work and pretend there aren’t horrors worse than you ever imagined in this world,” he said. “I’m the guy who makes sure others can just pretend.”
She set the picture down. “I see.” She turned away.
“Wow, sweetheart,” he said, snagging her arm and turning her to face him. “What just happened?”
“Just promise me when you leave this time, you’ll say goodbye, Caleb,” she said, her voice shaking. “Because not saying goodbye—that was just not right. It hurt. And so did ten years of shutting me out. Don’t do it again.”
He pulled her close, stroked her hair away from her face. “Shay. I’m not going anywhere. I told you. I’m here to stay.”
“No,” she said. “You say that, but you’ll never be satisfied taking amateur jumpers out for entertainment, Caleb. I saw you today. Saving lives is natural to you. You’re one of the good guys, that’s clear. That’s something to be proud of. And I am. But you said so yourself—you didn’t really want to leave the Army. This life will get old, lack purpose, and you’ll reenlist.”
He tried not to smile because her reaction wasn’t just about being tired. She cared about him. Maybe she loved him. He was pretty damn sure he’d always loved her. “Were you aware, my little Shay, that the Hotzone is contracted to train a group of Special Ops candidates once a month? That I am, indeed, still very much involved with the Army?”
She blinked. “You are?”
“That’s right,” he said, and picked her up. “I don’t have to go anywhere but here to make a difference.” He carried her past the worn leather couch and chair, down the short hallway to the bedroom—just big enough for a bed and nothing else—and laid her down. He went down on the mattress. “Sleep. You’re going to be nervous enough facing your family. Some rest will help.” He brushed his lips over her forehead. “Unlike you, I never showered this morning. I’m going to take a quick one and I’ll join you.”
She sat up. “Don’t go. Shower before we leave.”
“If I don’t go shower now,” he said and winked, “you won’t get any sleep.”
***
SHAY HAD JUST HEARD the shower turn on when the sound of Caleb’s cell phone ringing from the living room caught her attention. She slid off the bed and rushed down the hall, afraid it might be her service, or George, calling.
She found the phone lying on the counter by the photo she’d been looking at, and quickly checked caller ID, hitting Answer when she recognized the number. “George? Are you okay? I’ve been worried sick.” The man was predictable to the second, and he’d been off radar fifteen plus hours. “You didn’t show up for your appointment. I spent last night, and this morning, worrying something had happened to you.”
“Sorry about that, Doc. Something urgent came up, as in I fell in love. I met someone. I haven’t been so happy in years.”
A red light flashed in her mind. “You suddenly fell in love and that made you miss an emergency appointment?”
“We’d had a fight,” he said. “But she showed up at my house and all is well. I can’t wait to tell you all about her when I get back from Mexico.”
“Mexico?!” she sputtered. The man barely ever left his house. “You’re going to Mexico?”
“Yes,” he said. “And they just called our boarding group. I’ll call you when I get home. Thanks for everything, Doc. I remember all those times you told me, loving someone means you could lose them, but it’s better than never knowing them.” He hung up.
Shay set the phone down and rushed to the bathroom to tell Caleb about George. He’d left the door open and she could hear the shower running. “My client called,” Shay said, sitting down on the lid of the toilet.
He looked around the shower curtain. “And?”
“He said he met a woman and he’s really happy.”
He snorted. “He stood you up for a woman. Nothing we didn’t know. Typical man. Always thinking with the wrong head.”
“Coming from a man,” she said.
He grinned. “I’m a soldier,” he said. “Respect comes before all base needs.” He disappeared behind the curtain.
She opened her mouth to crack a joke, but stopped. This wasn’t typical behavior for George. And that fancy house of his screamed some sort of money source. That would make him a target for the wrong woman. Shay thought of George’s pain over the loss of his wife. She thought of her fears that she and Caleb couldn’t and shouldn’t be together. That their family situation would end their relationship before it really got started, that he’d leave again, no matter how much he said he wouldn’t. The truth was, the only thing for certain was the moment.
She eyed the curtain, his naked silhouette behind the semitransparent material. She might not ever get the chance to make love to Caleb in the shower ever again. Shay stood up and undressed.
Before she could talk herself out of it, Shay pulled back the curtain and stepped inside. The minute she took in the sight of his sinewy muscles dripping wet, Shay was glad she did.