Elliot sighed. “I can see this is upsetting to you. I am sorry, but when Spirit asks, I can’t say no.”
“No, no, it’s not that,” Birdie said. “The upset was already a reality. It’s the answer that was shocking. Tell Mama thank you for the message. And I thank you for delivering it.”
Elliot smiled. “You can tell her yourself. She’ll always hear you, even if you don’t know she’s there.”
Birdie threw her arms around Elliot’s neck and hugged him.
“Thank you, sir. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.” Then she gave him back his coat. “And God bless you.”
“He already has, countless times in my life,” Elliot said. “My sympathies for your loss,” he said, and walked away.
Birdie went back inside and walked straight to the casket and looked down at her mother. She almost looked like she was sleeping.
Oh, Mama…thank you. I’m going to figure out a way to get them all together, Hunt included, and give him the answers he deserves.
She blinked away tears and slipped into the crowd, glad her absence had not been noted.
* * *
Hunt had gone back to Granny’s for supper, but only because he didn’t want to spend the evening alone. When he was finished, he left a tip on the table and went up front to pay. He felt the stares as he moved through the room, suddenly wishing for the anonymity of Houston. Nobody knew him at Granny’s, but after the funeral tomorrow, everyone in town would know he was back.
He drove through the quiet peace of a night in Blessings, thinking about the frantic hustle and bustle of Houston traffic. As soon as he got home he went inside, but he was too antsy to settle. His mother’s body was on display, and that was somewhat offensive to him, so he moved through the house, kicking off his boots, hanging up his jacket, and then stripping down to a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt.
But the old house and the disarray it was in bothered him, and it was too early to go to bed. There were many things he’d learned while in the army that mattered to him now—like order and neatness, and enjoying the burn of muscles and the surge of adrenaline from physical activity.
He needed to run—to get lost in the rhythm of his body and the hammer of footsteps to earth, and thought of the path through the park just beyond the backyard. Without hesitation, he put on some running shoes and headed out the back door, then out the gate and into the park.
There was just enough moonlight and security lights in the park to see the sidewalk that wound through it, and he took off at a lope, taking it easy until he got into the rhythm, and then he amped up his stride. From a distance, he was little more than a dark shadow on the path, and then he disappeared into the trees and was gone.
Two hours later, he’d circled the park more than a dozen times. He was dripping sweat and his legs were burning, but he felt good. He’d worn out the sadness and the anger of this place for the night—at least enough to be able to sleep.
He stripped in the laundry room, tossed his clothes in the washer and started it up, then went to shower. After he was clean again, he crawled into bed and turned on the TV. Just to be on the safe side, he set the alarm so he wouldn’t oversleep. After flipping channels without finding anything to catch his attention, he turned the TV off and closed his eyes.
He was halfway between dozing and dreaming when Ava’s face suddenly appeared before him. She looked scared and she was crying. Then his dream shifted and he was standing in the doorway watching her leap off the porch, skipping the steps, as she ran away. He fell asleep, dreaming that he needed to see her but couldn’t find her, and woke up to an alarm.
It was already tomorrow. The day they buried Mom.
He turned it off, then rolled over onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.
God give me the strength to endure and the wisdom to keep my mouth shut doing it.
Then later as he was leaving for the church, he thought of Ava again and how she’d made him feel yesterday.
Her knight in shining armor.
If only.
He knew she’d gone back to work today, so he wouldn’t see her at the service. He also knew he was opening himself up to complications by being around her, but the bottom line was he wanted to see her again.
* * *
Gordon was exceptionally patient with Emma this morning. He knew the day was going to be grueling for all of them and would do anything he could to make it easier, even making breakfast for them while she was in the shower.
Emma came into the kitchen in her bathrobe, smelled the pancakes and coffee, and burst into tears.
“Oh, Gordon, you are such a sweet man.”
Gordon hugged her. “I love you, honey. I’m so sorry for your sadness. Come eat a little before we leave for the church, okay?”
Emma slid into the chair, letting her husband serve her, and then they sat and ate, talking about nothing in particular as married people often do. But it was the comfort of his presence and the kindness that touched her most. By the time they were leaving the house, she felt better able to cope with the day ahead.
* * *
Junior ate two Pop-Tarts and drank a cup of coffee before getting ready. The silence of his house was never more obvious than it was this morning. Now that his mother was gone, he didn’t have anyone in his life who cared about his welfare. He wanted to find a way to change, but he didn’t know how. Every dream he’d had as a kid died when the secret became more important than the people who kept it.
By the time he was leaving for the church, he’d worked himself up into a bundle of nerves. They were going to spend the whole freaking day with Hunt. He didn’t think Hunt would make any kind of scene, but the guilt alone was enough to make his brother’s presence uncomfortable.
* * *
Ray and Susie were walking out the door to go to the funeral at the same time that Ava was on the job in the ER, cleaning an open wound on a teenager’s head. The ER doctor was standing by, ready to glue it shut. Life didn’t stop for one family just so another family could lay a loved one to rest.
Even though that ceremony was a vital end to the circle of one life, the lives of others still went on.
* * *
The siblings arrived at the church one by one and were escorted into a classroom near the sanctuary to wait until it was time for the service to begin.
Emma and Gordon were the first to arrive, but Junior was right behind them. Ray and Susie came in arm in arm, then hugged the others, making small talk without knowing what to say.
Mama had been present when they’d buried their daddy, but now they were the adults in charge and this felt awkward and wrong.
Birdie came in wearing blue in honor of her mother’s favorite color, but her eyes were red-rimmed and swollen.