“And do they stay in love? Do they live happily ever after?”
He opened his mouth to assure her that, of course, they did. It was what she wanted to hear. Instead, he sighed. “Do you want me to lie to you?”
“No.”
“Many love matches fail, but there are a few that seem based on mutual respect.” He swallowed as he took a step closer to her. “I am looking for that in my marriage. One where I respect her, and she me. We can work together to achieve the same goal.”
“Your political career.” It wasn’t a question, but he answered it anyway.
“Yes.”
“And did you find her tonight? Do you have a list of eligible ladies who will fit your plans?” She gestured over the writing desk. “That’s Diana’s list for me.”
He saw that it was crumpled and tossed into a corner of the writing desk. “You don’t like her suggestions?”
Amber looked up at him, and in the candlelight, her eyes seemed to glow. “It’s not falling desperately in love, is it? It’s not happily ever after if it’s planned like a military campaign.”
“So, you cry because your dreams aren’t coming true the way you want them to?” He wasn’t chastising her for that. He was merely trying to understand, and her nod took away his confusion.
“I am such a fool,” she whispered.
“Actually,” he said as he leaned against the mattress, “It makes you remarkably clearheaded to both feel the emotion and know its cause.” He touched her cheek. It wasn’t wet, but her skin was heated, and her eyes still swollen. “I cannot think of many men or women who understand themselves so well.”
She snorted. “Then, you have remarkably stupid friends.”
“On the contrary. I find you remarkably intelligent. And given that my sister Gwen is a great bluestocking, that is high praise indeed.” She didn’t respond to that, and in time, he said what he really wanted to say. “I want to make this better for you.”
Her lips curved. “Will you fall desperately in love with me?”
His gut clenched, and his heart thudded hard in his throat. “Amber…” Her name came out in an anguished sigh. She was not a possible wife for him, and yet his blood surged at the thought.
She waved him aside. “No, no. It is a silly dream.”
He pulled her face back to look at him. “It is not silly. I want you. Can you not tell?”
She frowned, and her head moved back and forth in slow denial.
He should not do this. He had already taught her too much. But he did not stop himself as he took hold of her hand and slowly, gently brought it to the heated bulge behind his falls. The press of her hand was electric as sensation burst through his body. He steeled his spine so as not to thrust forward at her touch. And when he spoke, his voice was rough with need.
“Do you know what that is?”
“I… Yes.” She wet her lips, and he could not stop looking at the glisten of moisture on her mouth.
He forced himself to release her hand and was grateful when she did not pull away. She used her fingers to measure the length of him. It was curiosity, he knew, but it felt like the touch of a talented courtesan. She inflamed him. And while he controlled his breath, his hips surged forward into her hand.
“Is this all right?” she asked as she pressed back, adding resistance to his thrust.
The candlelight showed him the flash of desire in her eyes. “Minx,” he said as he teased her back. “You know I want it. I have told you so.”
“I have heard about it,” she said absently, her gaze focused on what she did as she outlined the tip of his cock. “The upstairs ladies talk a great deal about it.”
“I shudder to imagine.”
“Is yours considered large?”
Such a question! “Above average, I should think.”
She grinned at him. “Isn’t that what all men say?”
“Yes, I suppose so.” The sight of her grin made his heart light. Indeed, everything about her made him happier, though it made no sense whatsoever. He might have thought about it more deeply. He was a man who considered such things. But he had no more thoughts as she deftly unbuttoned his clothing and began to peel the fabric away.
“Amber.” He groaned. “This is not proper.”
“Neither am I,” she said bluntly. “And if you don’t mind, I should like to see it for myself.”
He didn’t mind. He wanted it desperately, and she knew it. He didn’t help her free him from his clothing. Instead, he touched her cheeks, her hair, and the sweep of her ear.
“You don’t need to do it. This is not why I came here.”
“But I want to.” She abruptly changed her position on the bed, coming forward to sit on her knees. He stood with his knees pressed against the mattress. She inspected his cock from all angles, then she looked up at him. “I would like to experience a little.” She touched him with tentative fingers and curiosity. But while the blood roared in his ears, she began to grip him more firmly and squeeze the head.
His hand wove into her hair, and his other gripped the bedpost. His buttocks tightened, but he didn’t thrust. He didn’t want to frighten her.
“Amber,” he groaned. “You don’t know what this does to a man.” He was holding onto control by the barest thread.
“Does it make him fall in love?”
He swallowed, and his heart squeezed in his chest. “You know it doesn’t. It makes him hunger. It makes me want you such that I cannot think of anything else.”
“That’s not love.” She spoke as if she already knew the truth but needed to keep repeating it to herself. It was a way to remind herself that this wasn’t what she wanted. And yet, she kept touching him. And when her head bowed, and she took a tentative lick across his head, he lost all rational thought.
He groaned and swayed toward her. She held him firm, and he thrust through her hand and into her mouth. And while he was stifling his moan, she swirled her tongue around him. Such a glorious feeling, and then she made it better. She sucked him. A quick pull, but he went with the motion, thrusting inside her mouth until she completely engulfed him.
His blood roared. Heat and wet pleasure. All wound together while her hand fluttered across his thighs and between his legs to touch his balls.
He gasped beneath a tidal wave of desire. He pulled back, unwilling to abuse her even more, though she fought him with a suction that tore at his sanity. He escaped her hold and fumbled for the handkerchief. But he was too slow, and she had him completely unraveled.
He erupted like a boy with his first woman. He caught most of it, saving her from embarrassment. Or perhaps he was saving himself, because she watched with rapt interest.
He released into his own hand. His breath came in raw gasps as he leaned hard on the bedpost. She helped steady him with hands braced at the top of his thighs. He was shuddering against her, and the smell of her excitement mingled with his own.
He stood there, letting the last of the release roll through his body. He saw her growing curiosity as she watched him. Her nipples were pebbled beneath her nightrail, and her hair fell about her shoulders in glorious temptation.
Such a contradiction. She was innocent in practice and yet knowledgeable. She spoke boldly of what she wanted and yet dreamed of love like a schoolgirl. She knew that a man’s lust wasn’t love, and yet, when she looked at him, it was as if stars filled her eyes.