I shook my head and took a drink of my own. “Just reminiscing.”
Lex raised an eyebrow.
“You know, thinking about how pretty you used to be.”
A deep chuckle tumbled out of Lex’s mouth. “Fuck you.”
“I think Arden might protest, but I’m down.” I smirked when he rolled his eyes. Sometimes the cycle of our relationship felt strange to me—from fuck buddies to near radio silence for eight years to probably best friends. Arden was a lucky man and I was just grateful to have Lex back in my life despite the circumstances surrounding his return. Last summer, I’d failed him. Failed to keep Arden safe and gotten the shit kicked out of me and thrown right through a window at the back of the cabin. Lex never blamed me, but those scars still lingered.
“Now you look like you’re planning a funeral.” Lex’s voice brought me back to the present. “You alright, man? The job give you trouble?”
“Just tired I guess.” I downed the rest of my beer. “The job was smooth.”
Lex’s dark eyes held mine. “Good. Needed to be done.”
I couldn’t agree more. The look on Pax’s face alone when I’d held up that photo would have been enough to send me after that fucker. The sound of one of the ATVs Lex and Arden used to get from their garage out by the road back to the cabin filled the quiet clearing. A moment later, headlights illuminated the trees from the front of the house, then the engine went quiet. Lex and I both stood, ready to go help Arden carry our dinners into the house—he’d already been gone to pick them up from the diner when I got there—but then laughter reached us and Arden walked around the corner of the porch, a plastic bag in one hand and Pax beside him.
“Hey, guys!” Arden said, bouncing down the steps and lifting on his toes to plant a kiss on Lex’s mouth. “You wanna eat inside or out here?”
My eyes wandered to Pax, who was still standing on the porch. He looked hesitant which I didn’t like at all. I hadn’t seen him since I’d gotten back, and even though I wasn’t sure what my next move should be where he was concerned, that didn’t mean I didn’t want to see him. Judging by the way my stomach had swooped when he’d come into view, I definitely did want.
“Don’t I get a kiss?” I joked, thinking they’d assume I meant from Arden, but I kept my eyes on Pax’s, smiling when he blushed. Arden pulled back from his man and arched one elegant blond brow at me before coming over and kissing my cheek. “Thanks, sweetheart.”
“You’re welcome.” Arden smiled wide. “Now, food! Out here or inside?”
“Out here, I think,” Lex said. He lifted one hand to his mouth and let out a loud whistle. “Pip! Dinner time!”
Their gray pitbull had been out playing in the trees, but only a moment after Lex’s call, I could hear paws hitting the ground at a run. Arden handed off the bags to Lex and dropped into a crouch. A second later, Pip came barreling out of the woods and went straight to Arden’s open arms, licking his face and nearly knocking him on his ass.
“Easy, boy,” Lex admonished, setting the bags of food on the picnic table.
While they pet Pip, I took a couple steps toward the porch where Pax was still standing. He looked good, but still so tired. I wondered if he’d been sleeping at all.
“Hey, stranger,” I said, walking right up onto the bottom step and holding up my hand in offering. “You wanna join us?” I felt it all the way down into the soles of my feet when he slipped his hand into mine.
Chapter Four
Pax
I was going to kill my best friend. Not because I didn’t want to see Mace. I did. But he could have warned a guy. Instead, I’d been struck dumb by the sight of Mace standing beside the fire in his dark jeans and hunter green henley. He had it pushed up his forearms, showing off all their sexy, corded muscle. Then he’d smiled at me, and my brain had flashed to the one perfect second I’d spent with my lips pressed against his. All that was tangled up with the mess of feelings that I was still trying to work through from knowing the reason I hadn’t seen him for the last couple of weeks had everything to do with that photo he’d burned to ash.
The relief pulsing through me at seeing him alive and well left me lightheaded and made up for every sleepless night I’d had since the last time I saw him. If Mace was here with a smile on his face then a man was dead. Dead because he’d hurt me. Dead because the reliable man in front of me made me a promise when I was at my weakest, and he’d kept it. It was a lot to take in, and part of me thought I should be swimming in guilt. The only guilt I felt was that I didn’t feel guilty at all.
Mace’s thumb brushed over the back of my hand, and he stepped up a couple more steps until he was only one below me.
“You okay?”
I tilted my chin down and met his eyes. His gaze was heavy, filled with questions beyond the simple one he’d asked.
“Yeah, I think so,” I answered in a whisper. Arden and Lex weren’t actively paying attention to us, but the connection stretching between us in that moment felt personal, private, and I didn’t want to share it.
Mace smiled. “Good. You hungry?”
Suddenly, I was. “Starving.”
“Then come on.” He lifted my hand and pressed a kiss to my knuckles, then led me down the steps. As soon as my feet hit the ground, Pip pulled against the hand Arden had on his collar and my best friend let him go.
“Hey, boy.” Letting go of Mace’s hand, I dropped to my knees and let the now eighty pound dog lick my chin while I gave him all the pets. “I’ve missed you.”
Pip barked at me and then took off running, making zig-zagging circles all around the yard.
“Zoomies!” Arden laughed, watching him. He walked over to me. “Help me bring out drinks?”
“Sure.”
Mace had walked over to the table and was helping Lex unload all the carry-out boxes of food. He glanced at me as Arden and I made our way up onto the porch and through the back door. The moment it closed behind us, Arden turned on me.
“I think you’ve been holding out on me,” he said, hands on his hips and a little pout on his lips.
I rolled my eyes. Dramatic was my best friend’s middle name. “I really haven’t. You’re reading too much into it. He made me a promise and he kept it. End of story.”
Arden narrowed his gray eyes. “Is it though? Do you want it to be? Because what I just saw looked more like opening credits.”
With a sigh, I walked over to the fridge and pulled it open. “You know things have been a little rough for me since everything happened last year, and I just...I don’t think I can let myself—” I cut off not knowing exactly what I wanted to say. Be that open? Be that vulnerable? Trust that much? Neither one of us were relationship people, but I was afraid even something casual with him could ruin me. Mace’s attention was addictive, and I really didn’t need to let myself get hooked. “It doesn’t matter. It’s just a bad idea.”
“I don’t know if you noticed, but things have been a little rough for him too.” Arden’s hand landed gently on my shoulder, turning me so we were facing each other. His eyes were shiny. “I hate that so many people got hurt because of me and I don’t mean to push. I just want you guys to be happy.”