Four years later, it hurt just as much as the damn night he’d never shown. I had thought turning fourteen would change things for me. Had I known it would have been for the worse, I would’ve kissed him longer and forced him to tell me why he’d been acting so strange before he left.
“Hey, are you okay?” Jacob reached over the center console and placed his hand on my thigh.
It didn’t feel the same way as when… Oh, my God. I had to stop. Even though he still consumed my thoughts, it was worse than normal. What the hell was going on with me? It had to be because I was going away to college where I’d have no chance of seeing him.
At home, I’d slip back to the border every so often. Hell, I’d been there last night, begging for him to show, which was stupid. If he had shown his face, I would have wanted nothing to do with him. I couldn’t chance getting hurt like this again. Even when Libby and Grace had gotten their hearts broken over their first loves, they’d licked their wounds and gotten back out there. Not me. My heart was still in pieces, and I was afraid it would never be whole again.
“We’re here at college, finally,” Jacob said, bringing me back to the present.
I shook my head and blinked. “What was the question?”
His brown eyes filled with concern. He always worried about me in some way. “If you were okay?”
“Oh, yeah.” I waved it off with my other hand. “Just nerves.”
“I’ll be right beside you.” Jacob’s words sounded like a promise.
A promise I wasn’t sure I wanted. He’d been after me since my fourteenth birthday. After two years of him asking both me and my parents, I finally went on a date with him. He and my parents had pestered me about it every day until I’d eventually agreed. How could I keep turning down the very people who’d taken me in when I was unwanted by my own flesh and blood? He was handsome, kind, and considerate—everything you’d ever want in a man—but I was broken. I was afraid to let anyone else in like I had with Aidan.
Aidan.
Shit. Even thinking his name affected me. It was time to get my shit together.
We turned onto a side road that took us past the business building and toward the dorms. His dorm was right next to mine, so it made moving our stuff in more convenient.
“Did your dad alert the local pack that we’re attending here?” Colleges were neutral territories, but if we went off campus to hang out, they needed to know we weren’t trying to invade them. One main pack controlled the small suburb here, only a half-hour north of Atlanta.
“Yeah, they said they appreciated the heads up.” Jacob winked. “So, we’re good, and I can take my girl out any time I want.”
He was so damn sweet and patient but relentless. If I even hinted that I wasn’t happy, he’d go crying to his dad and my parents. We’d done some things together, but we hadn’t gone all the way. I couldn’t bring myself to, but he had been clear that a wolf had needs, so some things were expected.
Even when I pushed him off, he never looked at another girl. For some reason, he was all-in with me. Grace swore it had to do with me being one of the few girls who weren’t fawning all over him. I was a challenge that any strong alpha would love. She might have a point, but I wasn’t doing it to be a challenge. The simple truth was that I could never love him the way he wanted me to. My heart had been taken years ago, and I still hadn’t gotten it back.
My large brick building appeared, and he pulled into a parking spot. Several other people were doing the same thing.
“Ready?” He turned toward me with a smile, his brown hair still shaggy and falling into his eyes.
I couldn’t help but smile at his boyish charm. “Yeah.”
He bent down and waved his hand toward the building. “Then let’s get you set up.”
He climbed out of his Ford F250 truck and hurried over to my side. He opened the door for me and took my hand to help me down. He towered over my five-foot-ten height, which was saying something. I was taller than half of the human men.
“Thank you.” I took a deep breath, making sure I concentrated on the moment.
“You’re welcome.” He leaned down and brushed his lips against mine.
It felt nice, but that was it. When he tried to deepen the kiss, I stepped back.
I watched as he headed to the bed of his truck and opened the tailgate. He was muscular and cut in all the right places. He’d gone to a local college my senior year of high school, and because of him, they’d won the championship. After finding out I was going to Crawford University, he applied and received a full scholarship.
In a way, I’d wanted to come here alone—a fresh start without any baggage—but that dream had gone out of the window when he’d decided to come here with me.
Once we’d unloaded all of my things, we headed up to the dorm. Two girls were standing in the front, smiling.
“Hi,” said the girl who had dark brown hair cascading over her shoulders as her hazel eyes scanned Jacob from head to toe. “I’m Caroline, one of the RA’s here.”
“Nice to meet you.” He smiled as he dropped one of the bags to the ground and wrapped an arm around my waist. “I’m Jacob, and this is my girlfriend, Emma.”
“Oh.” Her eyes dimmed for a moment, but soon her smile was back. “It’s nice to meet you both. This is Jules, another RA here.”
“Do you know which one is your room?” Jules flipped her auburn hair over her shoulders as she batted her brown eyes.
It probably should have bothered me, but it didn’t. One thing about us wolf shifters was that we had genetics on our side, and Jacob was one of the best-looking shifters in our pack.
“Yeah, it’s on the second floor.” I stepped out of Jacob’s arm so he could pick up the bag again. “It’s nice to meet you two.” I walked around them as Jules giggled and lowered her voice to tell Jacob, “I hope to see you around soon.”
“You sure will.” His voice sounded fake, but I was sure neither of them noticed. “I’ll be here a lot with Emma.” He turned and left them in silence.
I opened the door to my room, and the musky smell of another wolf shifter hit my nose.
My roommate was a wolf shifter too. For some reason, that surprised me.
Jacob’s eyes met mine, and he nodded toward the hall.
“Is that my roommate?” the girl called from inside.
I paused for a moment and stepped inside the room. “Yes, it sure is.”
It was obvious when my scent hit her. Her blue eyes darkened, and her shoulders sagged. She pursed her lips and pulled her royal blue hair into a makeshift ponytail. “You’re a shifter.”
Not sure what that was supposed to mean, I replied, “Look, if you aren’t cool with me rooming with you, I’d bet we can get someone to switch.” I didn’t want to feel unwelcome in my own room.
“No, I’m relieved.” She dropped her hands back to her sides, and her eyes bounced from me to Jacob.
“Okay, good.” Her being a wolf from a different pack could be a good thing. I wouldn’t have to hide my supernatural abilities from her.
She tilted her head and bit her bottom lip. “It’s fucking perfect. If we need to leave in the middle of the night, we won’t have to come up with excuses for needing to be in our animal form.”