“It’s not just that, though. Valerie already hated me, but now it’s going to get much worse. And Hunter… I have no idea what he’ll do. This year is going to be bad, Anderson. There’s no reason you should have to deal with all that.”
“There’s no reason you should either,” he points out.
“It’s different for you. They’re your teammates, your friends.”
“I don’t need friends that act like that,” he says simply. “If they want to shun me for dating you, let them. Maybe it won’t happen that way. Who knows? Maybe I could shelter you from some of the blowback. I know I’m no Hunter,” he says, rolling his eyes, “but I’m not exactly the head of the AV club, either. I have some social standing of my own.”
“You did,” I say, meeting his gaze. “I don’t know if Hunter will let you keep it if you date me.”
“I’m not afraid of Hunter Maxwell,” he tells me.
Maybe you should be.
I don’t say that.
I try to ignore the sinking feeling, the dread gathering around me. We’re talking about Hunter too much.
“Taking Hunter out of it, Valerie, all of them…” Anderson catches my gaze. “What do you want to do? Don’t try to protect me; I can look out for myself. No one else gets to dictate this decision, Riley. If you’re sure you don’t have any feelings left for me, then all right, I’ll accept your decision. I won’t like it, I still don’t think you’ve seen what a relationship with me can really be like, but that’s my fault. I moved too slow over the summer because I’ve never met a girl like you, you don’t act the way I’m used to girls acting when they like me and I couldn’t tell what you wanted. Then Hunter came back, and that was it. But it doesn’t have to be like that this time. If you’re willing to give us a real shot… that’s what I want.”
I’m not sure it’s a good idea, but… I’m not sure he’s wrong, either.
I do like Anderson, I enjoy spending time with him—or I did, prior to this past week. But neither one of us handled things perfectly. I knew he’d be ambushed by my reputation when he went back to school, and I didn’t even warn him. I could have prepared him, then maybe he would have handled everything differently.
At the end of the day, I think he’s right that we didn’t stand a chance with the way things were handled.
I also think he’s probably right that we’re both capable of doing better.
Yes, I wanted to break up with the football player I was at that party with last night, but I had wanted to go out with the nice boy who held my hand beneath the glow of the Ferris wheel this summer.
Hunter coming back screwed everything up. If he would’ve stayed in Italy, I doubt Anderson and I would have split up.
Maybe that means we shouldn’t have.
Hunter’s a jerk. Whatever soft spot I’ve always saved for him in my heart, there’s no excuse for what he did to me last night.
I am done with him.
So maybe I’m not done with Anderson. Maybe with Hunter out of the way once and for all, things will be different between us.
I still have reservations, but it’s nice to enjoy being with Anderson again, and it’s so nice not to be alone right now. I expected to be alone. I was prepared for it. I had tasks.
But it’s nice that I’m not.
It’s nice that he’s here.
Maybe that’s a good start.
“All right,” I say, meeting his gaze. “Let’s give it one more try.”
Anderson smiles. “Yeah?”
I smile back. “Yeah.”
Chapter Twenty Four
Riley
“We should wear dresses like those.”
I cock an eyebrow and look over at my mother beside me on the couch. We’re watching The Stepford Wives and while my mother is never lacking commentary for this particular film, her comments usually have nothing to do with fashion envy.
“Really?” I ask, grabbing a fistful of popcorn out of our shared bowl. “I think the big skirts would get annoying. Remember that Halloween party you went to dressed up as a queen? Getting your skirt in the car was such a hassle.”
“Well, yeah, but that was a floor-length gown with a hoop skirt. These seem much more manageable. I could definitely rock Faith Hill’s dress.”
I make a face. “I don’t know. I think that’s too much lace for you.”
“It’s only a little bit of lace trim on the bottom,” she argues.
“And that’s too much. I don’t think cheery sundresses are really our thing in general, but definitely not if lace is involved.”
Mom looks over at me. “Speaking of dresses, don’t you have homecoming soon? Is Anderson going to take you? We should go shopping before all the good dresses are gone.”
The mere thought of homecoming makes my stomach hurt. “It’s in a couple weeks. I don’t think I’m gonna go, though. Anderson and I haven’t really discussed it.”
“But isn’t he on the football team? Won’t he want to go?”
I suppose he probably would.
I really, really don’t, but if I’m going to date him, I guess I should take his wants into consideration.
“If he has his heart set on it, I guess I’ll go, but if not, I’m gonna pass.”
“Why? Dances can be fun, and even when they’re not, it’s a good excuse to dress up like a princess and let your mother take pretty pictures of you. It’ll be like your fifth birthday all over again, but you’re taller now.” When I do not appear impressed by that incentive, she adds, “Hey, maybe Sara could even tag along. I’m sure she won’t go if you don’t. I think you guys would have a good time.”
“I don’t know.” I grab another couple pieces of popcorn. “Not really feeling the bucket of pig’s blood they’d probably dump on my head.”
“Mm, that’s true. We’ll get you a red dress, just in case.”
“As long as my dress matches.”
“Exactly.” She misses a beat, but I can feel her probing gaze locked on me. “Is Valerie on her mean girl bullshit again this year?”
“I expect her to be even worse this year,” I tell her, though I obviously can’t explain why. “It doesn’t matter though, it’s nothing. I’m used to dealing with her. At least this is the last year I’ll ever have to.”
I can feel her disgruntlement, but she doesn’t offer further comment. I know Mom doesn’t want to let it go because she’s protective of me, but she’s not as fired up about it now as she used to be. We’ve been dealing with Valerie’s bad attitude throughout my high school career, so it’s nothing new at this point.
After the movie, Mom goes to bed.
I go to my room, too, but I’m not ready to sleep. It’s Sunday night and as soon as I go to sleep, it’ll be Monday morning.
Even in the worst of times while Hunter was away, I never yearned so vehemently to be homeschooled.
There’s nothing to be done about it, though. I just have to suck it up and deal with it, the same way I’ve dealt with Valerie all these years.