“Next weekend.” Her lips dip and she glances at Henry, the two of them sharing a look like parents are lame.
Reed’s busy on his phone, not even enjoying the ride or taking in the sights. Whatever, he’s not spoiling my day with Jade.
“It’s open, we can shoot over there after this,” Reed says without glancing up from his phone. I guess that’s what he was checking on his phone. Yet another way to hold me hostage.
“Yay!” Jade high fives Henry.
“Then you’ll miss all those other rides.” I point to the swing ride and few others down below us.
“They’ll be time after,” Reed says innocently. Too innocently.
I glare over at a smiling Reed again.
The kids swap seats with us, so they can see the lake and the boats. We talk about the lighthouse and what a lighthouse keeper does. I have to Google a few facts because I’m not the encyclopedia they believe me to be.
Finally, our time comes to a close and the ride stops so we climb out.
“The swings!” Henry says.
I hand them each their tickets and they run over to the ride. Stepping forward to join them in the waiting area, Reed tugs on the sleeve of my jacket.
“Hold up.”
I slow my walk.
“I’m sorry. It’s just...you’re right.” He runs his hand across the back of his neck, looking everywhere but at me.
My stomach bottoms out. What must he think of me?
“I figured.”
“I’m not proud of the fact I knew Pete wasn’t the man for you, but it’s not what you think.”
With my attention fixated on Jade and Henry, I stop at a stand to buy some water. “What is it then?”
Images of a naked stripper laying across a table and Pete plowing into her in the middle of his bachelor party come to my imagination. The embarrassment and shame of being cheated on might be the worst thing to come out of my divorce.
“I never saw him cheat,” Reed says emphatically.
I roll my eyes.
“Swear.” He pulls out his pinky finger.
My eyebrows shoot up. “I do the pinky swear thing with Jade, Reed. I’ll believe you if you say so. Not like it really matters anyway.”
The lie is that it does matter to me for some reason.
Seeming appeased, he hands a twenty over to the cashier and stuffs his hands in his pockets.
“I’ll get it,” I say, grabbing my wallet out of my purse.
“I already did.” He smiles that panty melting one that ignites every nerve in my body.
“So, you never saw him, but…”
He pushes the change into his pocket and we walk forward, I unscrew the cap to the water and down a sip.
“There was a night I had to tell him not to put me in a bad position.”
“He was flirting?” I guess.
I’m not surprised by it. I saw Pete flirt with my own eyes more than once. You’d think he thought I was blind.
“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean it was anything more. They could have just been talking.”
“Pete interested in a woman’s thoughts on things?” I widen my eyes and a smile tips his lips. “Not likely.”
“You’ve got me there.” He pauses, and we watch the kids get on their swings, the attendant double checking their harnesses. “Henry looks like he’s going to throw up.”
Reed’s right. He’s pale and his eyes are darting between Jade and us as if he’s contemplating escape.
“Maybe he feels pressure to go on the ride because Jade wanted to?”
Reed hangs over the metal guardrail. Cupping his hands over his mouth, he yells, “You okay, bud?”
Henry nods, but there’s nothing convincing about it.
Reed steps off the rail and the swings moves back to me. “I’d watch out for flying vomit, just in case,” he says to me.
We sit down on a concrete stoop and watch the kids as the ride gains speed, waving when they pass by us.
“Victoria, there’s more than that.” Reed’s voice doesn’t hold its usual confidence.
I swivel in his direction.
“I didn’t understand what you saw in Pete. I wasn’t willing to kill the bro code, but if he would’ve crossed that line in front of me, I would have…but not because I’m a noble person.” He holds my gaze for a second before continuing. “I would’ve done it because I was being selfish.”
“Reed.” I place my hand on his knee. “Do not feel guilty for not telling me your suspicions. It’s not like the two of us were friends. I understand where your loyalties were.”
“Are you listening to me?” He runs a hand through his hair and I get the sense that he’s frustrated by me, which gets my back up.
“Spit out whatever you’re trying to say.”
Instead of growing more frustrated with my attitude, a smile teases the corners of his lips. “I liked you then and I like you now.”
My stomach flutters with his admission. I don’t know if he means he liked me as a person in the past or liked liked me, but it doesn’t matter. I wish I could wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him like I’ve wanted to for weeks, but things aren’t that simple. I’m not that simple.
“Reed. I like you, too.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
I eye him for a long time willing myself the courage to put it all out there. He sits patiently and waits until I finally take a deep breath and speak.
“I come with a lot of baggage and they aren’t filled with makeup, sexy heels, and lingerie. They’re overflowing with doubt, trust issues, and low self-esteem. I come with a carry-on in the form of a seven-year-old little girl who, yes, seems adorable and sweet for the few hours you’ve seen her, but there’s a more difficult side. I won’t even mention the oversized bag in the cargo hold that is my ex-husband.
“I don’t come with that new love glow. I don’t possess the belief that we kiss and live in bliss, happily ever after. I come jaded. My corners aren’t round and smooth, they’re sharp and jagged. So, as much as I like you, and believe me I am attracted to you, this thing between us can’t happen. I’m sorry.”
I turn my attention away from him and unscrew the cap of water, gulping down the cold liquid like it will help push down all the raw emotion rising within me.
We sit in silence for a few moments and I can’t believe he hasn’t fought me on this. Not that I want him to, but I expected some sort of comeback.
“You’re right, I dated Olive. It was off and on. Never really that serious. Her family is friends with my family.”
Not what I was expecting.
“We went to the same expensive private school. We hung around with the same entitled crowd. We each got an insanely expensive car when we turned sixteen. Both of our educations were off-the-charts expensive and paid in full when we graduated. We shopped at the same designer stores. Flew to the same vacation destinations. I thought she was what I wanted…or maybe I convinced myself I was what she wanted. I don’t know.”
His hands knot together and in all the times I’ve been around Reed, he’s never looked this intense, this nervous.
“She tried to stop me from being a Big Brother. Told me my time was too valuable to spend it playing house with someone else’s kid. I know her type. Even though we weren’t serious, she had our big mansion in North Shore picked out. Had our kid’s names decided and a Pinterest board of decorated bedrooms for them. She tried to mold me into someone I wasn’t. Someone I never wanted to be.”