“I’m surprised you didn’t tell me it was over.”
A lick of a smile teased one side of his mouth. “Oh, that.” He patted the bed. “I suppose it’s not surprising that she dumped my ass.” He was acting so blasé about it, like ending his first long-term relationship was nothing.
“Was it your fault?”
“Isn’t it always?”
“Why are you asking me?” If I leaned over, I could scoop up my t-shirt lickity-split. But doing so would compromise the blanket’s concealment of my very naked torso. What I couldn’t stop wondering in the midst of this very best-friend-toned conversation was which one of us had first crossed the line the night before. I couldn’t remember much—it was as hazy as the morning fog off of Amber Lake in the fall.
“It was a mistake.”
I shifted my gaze to his. “Right,” I said automatically, the word coming out faster than I’d processed it. “No, you’re right.” If I said it enough, I’d be able to play this like it was just a mistake.
“Wait…”
Without worry of indecency—I mean, he’d already seen me naked—I reached over and tugged the shirt on. Somehow, being naked didn’t make me feel vulnerable anymore; I already was as vulnerable as I could get. He didn’t turn away; instead he stood up and came around to me.
“Navy.”
“Keane,” I said, forcing humor into my voice. “I haven’t forgotten what you told me forever ago.” I snagged my underwear and dragged it up my legs before giving him a smile I didn’t completely feel.
“What did I say?”
“Oh,” I said, flapping a hand at him as I grabbed my jeans and hopped into them. “Back when I had that crush on you in high school, and you said…” I rubbed a hand over my eyes, as if my fingers could draw the memory from my brain forward like a magnet. “I can’t remember what you said verbatim. Something about how we’re best friends and we don’t want to screw it up?” He’d been right. And he was right now. What we had done was a mistake, one I hoped we could fix. “It’s just a big mistake, right?”
He frowned, which made him look impossibly beautiful so early in the morning, his hair flopped over his forehead, his lush dark lashes framing his eyes. “I was talking about Megan, not you. You’re not a mistake, Navy.”
I secured the button of my jeans and shoved my bra into the back pocket of them. “I didn’t think you were calling me a mistake, Keane.” I motioned toward the bed as I haphazardly searched for my phone. “I mean, I think we can both admit that last night was one, though, right?” Because really, deep down—I knew it was a mistake. Sex made things messy; convoluted. Especially when it was sex with your best friend.
“We did have some booze.”
Relief mixed with embarrassment cascaded through me. “Exactly. Too many shots.”
“The climax was your choice. All of them.”
“What?” I straightened like my spine had snapped me upright.
Keane laughed. “Climax—that was the shot you picked.”
“Oh.” I nodded, like I remembered the freaking shots we’d taken. After finally finding my phone under his t-shirt, I checked for the missed texts from Hollis—because I knew they’d be there. Though I was staying at my aunt’s while she was gone, Hollis still checked in with me every night. I felt at home at my aunt’s house—after all, I’d grown up within these walls. But when I thought of home, I thought of the apartment I shared with Hollis.
I typed out a quick, I’m alive. I think message and paused so I could look at Keane. The rush of lifting my head so fast when I was so clearly dehydrated made him blur into two people. I put a hand over the eye without a contact lens. “A lot of booze,” I amended. “I really hope you paid for those drinks, Daddy Warbucks.”
“Whoa, calling me Daddy?”
I cringed. “God, that’s gross.” I waved his shirt at him before tossing it to him. “I didn’t mean that.”
“I’m no Daddy Warbucks anyway.”
“You’re richer than me.” I pulled my messy hair into a bun on top of my head—completely focused on making this the most chill conversation we’d ever had. If I pretended long enough, it would soon feel natural.
“I’m land-rich. Not money rich.”
“You have to take me out to it sometime.”
“Maybe Tuesday? Isn’t that what we talked about? I’m going to start painting.”
I could do this, play it easy breezy. “Ah, so you want some free labor.” I shoved a foot into one of my shoes. “Is there even power out there for that?”
“Yeah,” he said with a chuckle, handing me the other shoe. “I’ll take you out there. It’s just an old hunting cabin, Gramps used it mostly for the elk hunt in the fall.”
“And Asa doesn’t want the cabin?”
“No, he wants the other half. It gets better sunlight. It’s more uphill from the hunting cabin, so in the event of a flood, my side will get ruined first.” Keane laughed.
“Good ol’ sibling order at work.” I stepped into Keane’s bathroom he shared with Asa and checked my reflection. Mascara smudged down my cheeks, my lips red and swollen, my eyelids puffy from sleeping with makeup on. Good luck. “Speaking of siblings, I’ve got to check on the twins. If they want to come home today, I’ll have to pick them up.”
“The Adorables?” Keane asked. “I was going to ask when they’re going to get their licenses, but it’s probably a good thing for the rest of the world that they still rely on you to get them around.”
“Me, and my aunt.” I splashed water on my heated face, grateful that our conversation had dipped into the usual for us. This was our normal. This was good. Everything was going to be okay. I squirted some lotion on my hands and inhaled it before rubbing it along my arms. I had to not smell like sex if I was going to see my sisters in a little bit. “This is some nice stuff,” I told him.
“My mom has great taste,” Keane said on a laugh.
“You’re such a momma’s boy.” I rubbed the remnants of the lotion into my cheeks and down my neck. “You ever going to move out of your parents’ house?”
“I get free food and all the freedom I want. Who would want to leave?”
I stared at my fingers, slowly rubbing the lotion along my cuticles. Keane didn’t know how good he had it sometimes. I supposed anyone with present and caring parents took those things for granted, though. I knew I took the fact that I had an aunt as dedicated as she was to her nieces for granted sometimes. “Yeah, you’re right. It’s a sweet deal.”
“I’ll move out after the cabin is finished. I’ll rent it out and hopefully find something in town. So I’m still near my parents.”
“That’s good.” My nipples were standing at attention in the mirror. I might have played it loose and fast with fashion, but I couldn’t pick up my sisters like this. “Hold on a sec.” I closed his bathroom door, locked the door on the other side of the bathroom that went into Asa’s room, and slipped the bra over my shoulders before tugging the shirt back on and opening the door.