“That’s where you go every three weeks?” I asked.
“Yes.”
I felt guilty for assuming it was something else. “Does your brother or your father ever go visit her?”
“No.”
“Do they know where she is?”
“They do,” he said. “I’m sure they’ve sent things their money can buy. Maybe once or twice they may have snuck in under the guise of a charity event, but…”
“They can’t let the truth get out.”
“Exactly. That can never get out because it would ruin them both,” he said.
“But why haven’t you said anything about it at least?”
“There’s nothing to gain,” he whispered into my ear. “Do you mind if I change the subject?”
I shook my head and he slid his hands underneath my thighs, slowly turning me around until we were face to face. He leaned forward to kiss me—letting his teeth slightly bite my bottom lip, and then he grabbed both my hands.
“I want us to make this work,” he said, looking into my eyes. “I need us to make this work.”
“I said I was willing to give us another chance when we were on the plane.”
“No, no, no…” He shook his head. “You don’t understand what I’m saying.” His eyes were still on mine, looking more vulnerable than I’d ever seen him. “Almost everyone in my life has betrayed me at some point or used me for some type of personal gain. Almost everyone…My father is a goddamn liar and a cheat, my brother is a manipulative hypocrite, my ex-wife is an opportunist and a father-fucker.”
“You, on the other hand…” His lips found mine again and he pulled me down against his chest. “You’re my anomaly.”
“What do you mean?”
“Surely after all the crossword puzzles you’ve stolen from me, you know what the word ‘anomaly’ means.”
“I know what the word means, I mean in terms of us.”
“I mean that although I’m sure you’re practically incapable of doing any of the things my family has done, I don’t ever want to have to wake up and read the papers to find out about what lies you’re spinning, I don’t want to have to worry about you being with someone else, and something tells me no one else would put up with your incessant talking as much as I do, so this relationship would actually be in your best interest as well.”
“One of those clauses was not like the others…”
“I’m aware.” He let out a low laugh. “I just need you to promise to continue being my anomaly. And I’m also just not sure how to say I love you.”
I sucked in a breath, my heart immediately full of butterflies, and his mouth claimed mine with kisses, breaking down any playful resistance, cementing his feelings over my own.
When he finally let me go, I remembered what I needed to talk about tonight. What had changed in my life since we last broke up. “Wait, Jake. I have to tell you something.”
He ignored me, pressing his lips against mine again, slipping his tongue deeper into my mouth.
“No, wait…” I pulled away from him. “It’s really important.”
“Is it bad?”
I hesitated. “It depends on your definition of bad.”
“You know what bad is, Gillian.” He narrowed his eyes at me. “Is it really that bad to where you have to tell me right now, or can it wait?”
“It can wait.”
“Good.” His mouth was on mine again and he pulled me into his lap before standing up with me attached to his waist. “Tonight, I just want to focus on the good, and the fact that I really do love you.”
“If you love me so much, maybe we don’t have to do so much fucking anymore…”
“We’ll always be fucking, Gillian.” He smiled, biting my lip before tossing me onto the bed. “That’s the best part of us.”
Gate B38
Jake
New York (JFK) ---> Tokyo (NRT)
For the first time in years, I felt that everything in my life was almost right. That thrilling adrenaline rush I once lived for at every takeoff had now returned, and the fact that I finally had someone who wasn’t out to use or betray me, made me feel like I was capable of trusting again.
It’d only been a few days since I made up with Gillian, and I knew we had more work to do to get on the same page—to remain on the same page, but I was actually determined to make this work.
The second I landed in Tokyo, I called Jeff to make sure the flowers I’d ordered yesterday were still set to arrive at her place on Eastern time tomorrow.
“Yes, I placed the flower order, Mr. Weston.” Jeff laughed as he answered the phone. “All eight bouquets. That is what you’re calling about, isn’t it?”
“I called to discuss the weather.”
“I thought so.” He laughed again. “I like the way love looks on you, Mr. Weston. You’re far more tolerable this way.”
“I was tolerable before,” I said. “I’ll see you when I get back. And thank you.”
“You’re quite welcome.”
I ended the call and stood up to leave the cockpit, bidding the departing passengers farewell for the first time in as long as I could remember. I didn’t even get annoyed when they took their precious-ass time to take selfies in the aisle with the flight attendants.
When the last one deplaned, I walked down the jet-bridge and felt my phone vibrating against my pocket. Gillian.
“Hello?” I answered.
“Hey…” Her voice was faint for some reason. “I was hoping to get your voicemail.”
“Why is that?”
“I wanted to leave you an important message.”
“Are you drunk, Gillian?” I sighed. “Are you and your roommate playing some type of game tonight?”
“No…” She cleared her throat. “I need to tell you something, the same something I tried to tell you when we made up that day.”
I stopped walking as I entered the terminal, rolling my bag over to the windows. “So it is something bad?”
“No, it’s just bad timing.”
“You’re not pregnant.”
“No…” She laughed nervously. “No, I’m definitely not pregnant.”
“And you also said you didn’t fuck anyone else while we were apart.” I felt my jaw clenching. “Are you about to tell me differently?”
“No, that’s not it either. I’ve only slept with you since we’ve met.”
I tapped my fingers against the handle of my luggage, mentally rewinding the past months we’d been apart and the months prior that we’d been together. I thought about the times she’d given me her “Cliff’s Notes” of long stories, her bad days that always involved her family, and figured she was probably blowing whatever it was out of proportion.
“I take it this is going to be a long conversation?” I asked.
“Yes.” Her voice was damn near a whisper now.
“Okay.” I walked toward the transportation dock. “I’ll call you once I check into the hotel.”