He looked at Louisa, panic on his face, and she gave him a nod that released him to run after his mom.
She should’ve known this cocoon of happiness would soon be cracked open. She’d been living in a fantasy.
It was hours before she heard from Cody. In that time, Louisa tried to work, but she mostly aggravated Ally with her distractedness.
“What is going on with you today?” Ally asked, refiling paperwork Louisa had filed incorrectly. “Trouble in paradise?”
“I’m fine.”
“You told Linda Paulson you’d run her errands next week.”
“So?”
“You swore to me last time you would never work with that woman again. I think it was around the time she asked you to take her dog’s stool sample to the vet?”
Louisa groaned. How had she let that one slip by? Linda was notoriously high-maintenance and about the last thing she needed right now.
“So spill it.” Ally refilled Louisa’s mug of coffee. “And I don’t mean the coffee.”
Louisa let out a heavy sigh. She missed Cody. She wanted to know what he said to his mom. She wanted the chance to win Marissa over—she just wasn’t prepared to do it yet. She’d been so content to keep her relationship with Cody to herself, she’d fooled herself into believing it could stay that way. How stupid! Of course it couldn’t. They had the party this weekend! What had she planned to do—ignore him the whole night?
Now, more than ever, she had to figure out a way to set his family and hers back on good terms. She had to. Their relationship depended on it.
She told Ally about Cody’s mom, careful to add in the appropriate amount of woe is me, but Alyssa still shrugged her off.
“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” she said. “Nobody holds a grudge this many years. Besides, you guys are adults.”
But Ally hadn’t seen the death glare Marissa had given her on the street that morning.
“What if it’s not fine?” she lamented. “What if this second chance is really just another failed attempt?”
Ally went still. “You love him, right?”
Louisa rubbed her temples and let out a pathetic “Yes.”
“Then it’ll be fine.”
But Louisa knew better. Love didn’t always conquer all. If it did, Cody’s dad would still be alive.
“Let’s just get back to work,” Louisa said. “I’m tired of myself right now.”
Cody showed up late that night—she hadn’t heard from him all day—and she could tell things hadn’t gone well with his mom. Worse, she’d spent hours overthinking the situation, which had only left her conflicted and confused.
“Sorry for disappearing,” he said. “It’s been a long day.”
He stood on the porch, and while she couldn’t say for sure, it seemed like some of the distance that used to exist between them was back. She reached for him, and he stiffened at her touch.
Okay, now she could say for sure. The distance was definitely back.
“What did she say?”
“I told her not to come here.”
Louisa’s heart sank. If she hadn’t sent that invitation, this wouldn’t be happening right now. “I’m sorry,” she said.
He gave a sigh. “It’s not your fault. She’s an adult. She’s got to figure out how to move on.”
He sounded so certain. Louisa felt anything but.
“Louisa?” Concern washed over his face.
“I can’t.” She took a step back.
“You can’t what?”
“I saw the look on your mom’s face,” Louisa said.
“She just needs time,” he said.
But he didn’t know that—not really. It had been years, and his mother looked every bit as angry as she had been the day she left the island.
“Maybe we need some time,” Louisa said.
He frowned. “What are you saying?”
“Just that I don’t want to be the reason for any of this. My whole summer has been about trying to find a way to fix things, to put our families back together—this is the opposite of that.”
He let out a sound that was part scoff, part sigh and drilled her with his eyes. “So that’s it? You’re ending it because you’re worried my mom doesn’t like you? That’s ridiculous, Lou, and you know it.”
“No,” she said quickly. “I’m not ending anything. You know how I feel about you.”
“Then what?”
“We pause. Let this blow over. Figure things out after the party.”
“The party—” He practically groaned the words. “You’ve got so much riding on this party. If it doesn’t go the way you want it to, what then?”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. “I don’t know.”
“We’re not kids anymore, Louisa.”
He reached over and placed a hand on her cheek. She pressed her hand over his, closed her eyes, and drew him in, inhaling a scent that had become familiar and reassuring. She wanted to remember it always, so she marked it in her mind. Just in case.
“I’m tired of things tearing us apart,” he said quietly. “I don’t want to take a break.”
“We’ll figure it out. There’s a lot of history to wade through.” She opened her eyes and found him watching her.
He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek (a sure sign their relationship was doomed), jogged back out to his Jeep, started the engine, and drove away.
And Louisa went upstairs and cried herself to sleep.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
“YOU LOOK TERRIBLE.”
Louisa glared at her mom, who stood on the porch wearing a pink top, white linen pants, and the unmistakable expression of disapproval.
“I thought you would’ve been up for hours.” Her mom pushed her way inside the house, stopping in the living room.
Louisa plopped back down on the couch, where she’d been since the sun rose several hours ago. She pulled the blanket up and closed her eyes.
“What’s wrong?” her mom asked.
Louisa covered her face with a pillow. Her mother was the last person in the world she wanted to talk to right now. Why was she here? She didn’t even like Louisa.
Louisa couldn’t be sure, but she thought Mom had just sat down, which meant she wasn’t leaving.
“Why are you here?” she asked from underneath the pillow.
“I came to see if you needed any help with Maggie’s party,” her mom said.
Louisa sat up. “It’s tomorrow, Mother. You’re a little late.”
Her mom looked wounded at Louisa’s cross words, which had come out much harsher than Louisa had intended.
“What’s gotten into you?”
Would it be appropriate to scream into the pillow? Louisa was dangerously close to finding out.
She whipped the blanket off and tossed the pillow aside. “Mother, I am in love with Cody Boggs. I’m in love with him, and I’ve been in love with him practically since the day I was born. And I know I screwed up, but there’s more to it than my mistake. Teenage foolishness wouldn’t have kept you and Marissa apart, especially not after Daniel died. So tell me the truth—what happened between the four of you? What happened with you and Marissa, with you and Daniel, with Dad and Daniel? With all of you? Because whatever it was—it’s ruined my chances of being with the man I love, so don’t I deserve to know why?”