He finds my mouth again and starts a delicious rhythm inside me. He’s pounding harder and harder, and I feel like I’m going to scream. I push my hips up to meet him more—never able to get enough of him. I’m climbing and climbing, and my head is spinning with everything Jake. I can feel this familiar sensation rising up inside my very core, and I feel like my whole body is about to go up in flames with the pressure and heat of this beautiful man inside me. The feeling is a familiar one, but it’s so intense. I have never felt anything else like it. I can’t hold on any longer as my inner walls begin to tighten, and my legs go rigid at my impending orgasm.
I explode with the most intense climax I have ever felt in my life. I scream out his name over and over again, wondering if my orgasm will ever end.
“Fuck, Ana!” Jake growls in my ear. After one final thrust, I’m embracing the warm feeling of his release inside of me.
We lie for a while. Jake is still on top of me, and we are both trying to catch our breaths. I can’t believe that this has just happened. I feel delirious as I come down from the most mind-blowing orgasm I have ever had. Nothing could possibly be better than this. If this is a version of Heaven, then I never want to come back down to earth. I’m feeling so high, and I can’t stop the smile that sweeps across my face.
However, it doesn’t last long when realization hits Jake. “Oh, shit! Ana, what just happened? I can’t think properly when I’m around you.” Once again, he has spoiled the whole moment.
I’m not even sure what he means by this. Is he saying he regrets it now?
“I’m sorry.”
Oh, no. Not those words again!
“Are you on any contraception? Your mother and I never—”
He stops what he’s saying, realizing the almighty fuck up he’s just made. I’m laying here half-naked, and he decides to bring up my mother? I feel sick to my stomach. They never what? Do I really want to be hearing this?
Fantastic timing, Jake. Well done!
“I’m sorry. I need to leave. I can’t do this. It’s wrong.”
Oh, God, I think I’m going to die. Why does he keep doing this to me?
“Get out, please.” I can’t help the tears that sting my eyes. He gets up and quickly fastens his trousers. I have never felt so used in all my life. He glances down to me and winces when he sees my ripped dress.
“I never meant for this to happen. I’m so sorry. I just can’t do this.”
The anger inside me just keeps building. “I said get out. Just get out!”
He timidly shuts the door as he leaves, and I throw the back of my head against the pillow straight after. Right now, I feel more ashamed than I have ever felt. I feel like the world around me is ending, and I just want to get away. I have had enough of feeling for this man. I can’t believe he mentioned my mother after what we just did. Oh, God, is this sick? Am I sick? What did he mean? They never … they never what? I can’t get my head around what he was trying to say, and I don’t think I really want to. That’s a topic I need to get out of my head and fast!
I lie there for a while, and then I have a sudden urge for a shower. I run into my bathroom and take off my ripped dress to get a wash. I can still smell him everywhere, and I don’t want to wash that off, but at the same time, I feel dirty after what he’s done to me. I can’t help what I feel for this man. It has grown and grown, but now that this has happened, I’m not too sure what I’m going to do next.
After the shower, I feel defeated. I wish I could talk to someone about this, but I can’t say anything. I think about giving Jessie a call. She would know what to do. I just can’t tell her who it’s all about.
With a heavy sigh, I pick up the phone and dial her number anyway. I think about hanging up after two rings, but she answers before I can react.
“Ana, is that you?”
A sudden sob escapes me, making me feel even more useless. I have been trying to keep it together, but just hearing her concern causes the floodgates to open.
“Ana, what’s wrong? Do you want me to come over? Are you hurt? Talk to me?”
I take a deep breath, trying to calm myself. “Sorry to trouble you. I didn’t know what else to do.”
Jessie sighs. “You’re my best friend. If something is bothering you, I want to be the one you come to for help. I know I can be a bit of a handful with my joking around and shit, but if you need me, I’m here. That’s what friends are for, right?”
I let out another sob as her words settle in. “Thanks, Jessie.”
She takes a deep breath. “Now tell me. How can Auntie Jessie help you today?”
I laugh, already feeling a little better. “I’m in love.” The sudden words that fly out my mouth are a huge weight off my shoulders.
“So what has this asshole done? He’s obviously done something to you. You wouldn’t be calling me in tears otherwise. Give me his address, and I’ll go rip his throat out. Do I know him? Who is he, and why have you not told me about him before?”
Oh, no. I should have known. Of course she was going to ask me that!
“It’s complicated. I can’t say.”
She sighs again. “He’s married, isn’t he? Ana, don’t get mixed up with married men. You’ll only get heartache at the end of it, and there are so many single men out there you can pick—”
“Jessie, it’s okay,” I reply, interrupting her. “He’s not married. It’s just complicated. Please trust me enough to understand. I just can’t tell you who it is yet, but I still really do need your help. Please.”
I hear her clear her throat. “Okay. I don’t like it, but I won’t push you. Can I ask what happened, at least?”
My head spins. Where exactly should I start? “I have liked this person for a while, and I have just recently found out he likes me too. At least, I think he does, but every time I think we are getting somewhere, he pushes me away. I’m exhausted by it, and I don’t know what to do.” I feel a bit better having shared at least some of the burden. Keeping my feelings for Jake a secret has been killing me.
“Can I at least ask if this person will be at the party tomorrow?”
I had forgotten all about that. Jake’s having that barbecue tomorrow evening and has invited most of the gang over. Thinking about it has my stomach in knots.
“Yes, I do believe he is coming.” I hate lying to her about it, but I can’t tell her the whole truth either. It’s just too much.
“Well, then I know exactly what you need to do! Tomorrow morning, you are going to go out and pamper yourself silly. Get a facial. Get your hair and nails done. All of it. After that, I want you to go and buy yourself a knockout dress. Then, you will go to this party and knock everyone’s socks off—this asshole’s especially. Last but not least you will flirt with every man except him until he wakes up and realizes what he’s missing. You got that?”
I can’t help the laugh that escapes me. I’m so glad I didn’t hang up in the end. Jessie has instantly made me feel better. “You said all of that without even taking a breath!”
She snorts. “Well, he’s an asshole—whoever he is.”
I chuckle, feeling much better. “You’ve said that three times already.”