“I know you would never hurt your son. I know that, but can you trust Nash?”
I thought about it. “No, I can’t, which is why this will never go further than an occasional day out. That’s even assuming he wants to do it again.”
“What if he doesn’t?” she asked. “How do you think Jace is going to take that?”
“I’ll explain it to Jace that Nash is a busy man with a lot of work. Eventually, he’ll forget about him.”
She sighed. “I don’t know. I guess I look at the dark side of things. I know Caitlyn could benefit from a male figure in her life as well, but I’m worried about it.”
“What are you worried about?”
“That the man is going to let her down. I’m worried he’s going to break her little heart and traumatize her. That trauma might make it difficult for her to have a healthy relationship in the future.”
“That’s deep and that is definitely on the dark side. But a male figure in her life could also help her understand a positive male relationship. Don’t you think? You’re the shrink and you probably know more than me, but it seems like it would be nice for her to know that not all men are bad.”
“I’ve never said men were bad, but I have never had any luck with them.” She laughed. “I keep her from seeing it because I don’t want to completely ruin her.”
“I don’t blame you,” I said. “I’ve not had great luck. I don’t know what is going to happen with Jace and Nash, but if he is willing to be friends with Jace, I’ll take it. I want Jace to have someone to look up to.”
“I get it,” she said. “I do and I love to see him so happy. Threaten to rip Nash’s balls off if he hurts Jace.”
I threw my head back and laughed. “You better believe I will.”
“Did you guys make plans for later?” she asked.
“It was mentioned but nothing set in stone.”
“Are you still going to start your own company?”
I nodded. “That’s my goal.”
“What happens when you leave the firm?” she questioned. “Do you think you’ll be able to remain on good terms with him?”
I thought about it for a second. “I’m not sure.”
“Which means he wouldn’t be on good terms with Jace.”
“Maybe not. I don’t know. It’s confusing. Yesterday, he was so different. He was a totally different person. I think he genuinely liked Jace.”
“The guy is a sexy, eligible bachelor,” she reminded me. “When a woman manages to sink her claws into him, I can’t imagine that woman is going to be okay with her man hanging out with the woman he used to bang and her kid.”
“Maybe not, but with the way Nash is, I don’t think I have to worry about him settling down anytime soon. He’s been single this long.”
“All right,” she said and clapped her hands together. “I’ll stop trying to talk you out of it. I did my due diligence. Now, I get to be the friend that’s happy for you.”
“You were just playing devil’s advocate,” I teased.
“You know I have to,” she said with a smile. “We’ve got that stuff out of the way. Now tell me about the sex.”
“No!” I shrieked. “You’re crazy.”
“Come on. I need to live vicariously through you. In the office again?”
I nodded. “He bought me dinner. It was very sweet.”
“Are you sure you don’t like this man?” she asked. “You are warming up to him. I can see that written all over your face. You like him a lot more than you did a month ago.”
“I’m getting used to him, I guess. He is abrasive and I don’t fully agree with his way of doing things, but I can kind of see under the veil he hides behind. He puts on a front. He pretends to be a bigger douche than he really is. That’s not to say he is a nice man, because he isn’t, but he’s not as bad as I thought.”
“That’s high praise,” she said. “I’m sure he’d be happy to hear you only think he’s a regular douche.”
“He’s got some quirks, but when he lets down that guard, I get to see the man I used to know way back when.”
I didn’t want to revisit that time. It still hurt. It was one of those memories I tried to block from my mind. There were moments when I saw that younger version of Nash and got a little nostalgic. Then I remembered him crushing my heart.
“I’m happy for you,” she said. “I really am. I think you should maybe take a minute to consider this relationship you have with him. It could be something.”
I shook my head. “It can’t. No way. He’s not a man I want in my life.”
“He’s already in your life.”
“For now,” I corrected. “Eventually, I will find a man that I want to be a positive influence in Jace’s life. Nash is holding that place for now, but it isn’t going to be permanent. Nash is not the kind of role model I want for Jace. Not the way he is.”
“How so?”
“Uh, the screwing everything that walks thing is not the kind of man I want Jace to be.”
She laughed. “Oh goodness. I do not want to think of our sweet little Jace turning into that.”
“Exactly. Nash can teach him to fish and how to walk with a swagger, but when it comes to love and relationships, that is never going to happen.”
“I don’t blame you.” She fell quiet for a moment. “Unless he just happens to turn things around and becomes Mr. Wonderful.”
“And I will look for the signs of hell freezing over.”
Chapter 42
Nash
“Do you want some coffee?” Saige asked from my office door.
I looked up to make sure it was really her. She never offered me anything besides advice on where I could stick my thumbs and occasionally my head. I wasn’t sure if it was a trap.
“From the breakroom?” I asked.
“Yes,” she said slowly. “Did you want it from somewhere else?”
“No, the breakroom is fine. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” she said with a bright smile. “We have that meeting with the potential client in twenty minutes. Are you going to attend?”
“Yes, I should. I want to make sure people know I am the owner, and I will be hands-on.”
She shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
She left the office, and I was still wondering what was happening. Was she being nice because I spent the day with Jace? If that was the case, I would definitely volunteer my services again. She returned a minute later and set the coffee cup on my desk.
“Do you want to meet in here or the conference room?” she asked.
“I don’t know. Where do you normally do this?”
“My office.”
“Should we meet in my office?” I asked. I felt like a fish out of water. I did these things all the time, but in this firm, I felt like I was just starting out.
“If that’s what you want,” she said without giving me any help.