She wrinkled her nose. “Sounds so lawless. I don’t think I would have liked to live back then.”
Beck opened his mouth, then closed it as if he’d been about to say something but changed his mind.
“Beck?” She nudged him. “What is it?”
“I think it was probably beautiful back then,” he says. “Wild and free. I think… it was an improvement. When it was just the mountains and wild plains and humans hadn’t tamed it.”
“But isn’t that a little hypocritical since we’re humans?” she teased.
“Well…” He flushed, averting his gaze, and she wondered what that was about. “Yes, we take up resources here too. But we ain’t building shopping malls for people to buy stuff they plumb don’t need. We’re losing what’s important for what’s fleeting.”
She smiled at him, feeling her heart fill up every time he spoke lately. He was just such a sweet, deep man beneath that rough, growly exterior. She didn’t think she would ever get enough of him.
She might even love him.
“You’re right. This land,” she said. “Other people we care about. That’s what matters. Not things. I agree.”
“You two are made for each other,” TJ said, leaning back in his chair and looking easily between them. “I’m glad to see Beck happy, even if this isn’t long-term.”
In her heart, it was forever, but she knew she might never be able to have that. It would be up to Beck. She’d never force him.
She felt him stiffen beside her and put her hand over his to relax him slightly. “Hey. However this works out, I’m glad for what we have.” She smiled at him until his face finally relaxed and his eyes met hers gratefully. “I’m never gonna be mad at you, Beck. Not for doing what you want or think is best for you to do.”
Beck nodded. “I don’t deserve you.”
“Well, with that kind of mush, I’d better be going,” TJ said, winking at them and standing to get his hat.
She brought it to him while Beck handed him his jacket, and TJ surprised her by taking her hand to bring it up to his lips for a kiss.
Beck’s growl was loud and immediate, and TJ dropped it.
“Same ol’ Beck,” he said. “Hates to share. Sorry, I lost myself to my usual gentlemanly habits.” He put his hat on and tipped it. “No harm done.”
Beck was just standing there looking surprised by his own jealous reaction. But Sierra couldn’t help but be happy about it.
Beck moved in to give his friend a quick hug, and the men patted each other hard on the back as they parted.
“No hard feelings?” TJ asked.
“Of course not,” Beck said, opening the door for him. “You headed back to Wyoming?”
TJ shook his head. “Think I’ll stay around Dragonclaw for a while. See if you change your mind.”
“About what?” Sierra asked.
“Nothing,” Beck said. “And I won’t. But you’re welcome to visit. We could go for a ride, talk about the old times.”
“We’ll see,” TJ said, tipping his hat again. He leaped down off the steps with one easy stride of his long legs.
Then he was off down the drive, kicking up dust behind him, whistling as he went.
Sierra watched him until he disappeared behind the tree line, and then she looked over at Beck.
“What was with that growl?” she teased. “Jealous?”
“Of course I am,” he said, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her in close. “I don’t know where this is going, but for now, you’re mine. All mine.” He nuzzled against her with a little growl.
“He was just being polite,” she said.
“He was being handsy. TJ’s a player. Always has been.”
“He knows I’m with you,” she said.
“That may be,” Beck says. “Doesn’t make me less jealous.” He exhaled roughly. “Not that I have any right to be.”
They headed back inside, and he kept his hand on her lower back, protective as always.
If Beck didn’t mean to stay, how would she ever do without him? She didn’t even want to think about it.
Beck shut the front door, then joined her on the couch in the living room. “So what did you think of TJ?”
She leaned back against the soft, familiar cushions, thinking it over in her mind. “I don’t know. There was something about him…”
“What?” Beck asked, looking shocked. “Everyone loves TJ.”
“I don’t know,” she said, putting up her hands. “I’m sorry. I get that you’re close. It’s just the way he looks at you sometimes. Or little things he says that feel like a dig. Or like he knows something I don’t.” She smiled nervously up at him. “Or maybe I’m just the one who’s jealous.”
He grinned. “I don’t mind that.” His expression sobered. “But as for TJ, I don’t know. He knows me better than everyone, so yes, I would guess he knows things you don’t. I don’t see why that should make you uncomfortable. These things take time.”
“It’s not just that exactly,” she said. “There’s just this feeling… that he doesn’t respect you.” She felt panic hit her the minute she finished her sentence and wondered what she was thinking, saying that about someone Beck clearly trusted.
Beck just stared at her for a moment, brows lowered in confusion.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I just… You asked me, and I have this bad habit where I can’t not tell the truth.”
He sighed. “I love that about you. It’s just hard. TJ’s been there for me through a lot of things no one else could understand. Even my other friends. He knows my deepest secrets. My dark spots.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I would hope he doesn’t think less of me.”
“If he did, it wouldn’t reflect on you,” Sierra said quickly. “Beck, you’re the best man I’ve ever known.”
“It means a lot to me,” Beck said. “What TJ thinks about me.” He sighed roughly, looking down at his hands in his lap. “I know that sounds stupid, but he was there for me when no one else was. My best friend. My first friend.”
She got it and nodded slowly. “I get it. I’m sorry for putting my opinion in where it wasn’t wanted.”
Beck’s eyes met hers. “No. I definitely want your opinion, Sierra. You’re a smart, strong woman. I always want to know what you think. Even if I’m a bit sensitive about TJ. And some other things.” He looked away at nothing in particular, but Sierra could feel the distance growing between them.
She also had no idea what to do with it.
Even though she felt close to Beck, she knew so little of his history. She wanted to know everything.
“I hope you’ll tell me some of them sometime,” she says. “The things TJ knows that no one else does.”
“Jealous, huh?” Beck asked, but he had that hungry, heavy look in his eyes that she loved.
“Yes,” she said, brushing his hair back. He closed his eyes like a cat at how good it felt. “Of course. I want to be your best friend now.”