I almost vomited on the carpet.
I threw the lube into the shadows of the room.
How the hell did she think I could do this? I couldn’t have sex with her because I was as soft as overcooked spaghetti. She repulsed me. No way would I get hard for her.
I lifted my head, slightly braver. Perhaps this wouldn’t happen. Maybe I could survive the attempt and then accept the ridicule of being a cockless teen who couldn’t get it up.
With a flick of her mousy brown hair, she headed toward the mini bar. With her back to me, she poured two shots of amber liquor, then carried both toward me. “Here.”
“No.” I shook my head. “I don’t drink.”
I had a perfect role model in my father of why you should never drink.
I couldn’t stand the smell because it permeated the entire house I lived in. I couldn’t stomach the effects because it made me bleed on a regular basis.
“You don’t have sex either, but you’re about to.” She shoved the shot glass into my hand. “Drink it.”
My eyes narrowed as she clinked my glass with hers. “Here’s to a night of debauchery. You do know that word, don’t you? Don’t worry. If you don’t, you’ll be fully educated by the end of my lesson.” She winked and threw the alcohol down her throat.
My fingers squeezed the glass, wishing it would break so the liquid would splash onto the carpet. She stole the untouched shot from me, marched me backward to the bed with a hand on my chest, and pushed me when the back of my knees hit the mattress.
I sat down heavily, heart pounding, pulse throbbing as she walked into me, spreading my thighs and tipping my head up. “I said...drink.”
I didn’t have a choice as she tugged my chin and poured the liquor past my lips.
The burn disgusted me, and I grimaced, swallowing the obnoxious alcohol.
“Good boy.” She patted my cheek, then ducked to kiss me.
I jerked away, but she threw the shot glass to the floor, grabbed two handfuls of my hair, and held me captive while she planted a wet kiss on my mouth.
Everything inside me froze.
Her tongue shot past my lips, bringing another fresh hell of rum and misery.
I choked, shoving her backward and shooting off the bed.
She merely laughed, wiping her mouth with heat in her eyes. “My own little virgin to teach. Do you know how long I’ve thought about this? Standing in front of that class, reciting English and Math all while I watched you scribbling notes to a test, imagining you deep inside me.”
I shivered from ice and revulsion. “You’re sick.”
“And you’re going to be so much fun.” Holding my gaze, she unbuttoned her white shirt, making quick work of the buttons.
I dropped my eyes as she yanked off the material and stood in her lacy white bra.
“Don’t look away. Watch.”
Her command ordered my eyes up, and I gritted my teeth as she shimmied out of her skirt, undid her bra, and slipped her knickers off until she was bare before me.
No hair on any part of her.
Shaved and smooth.
I didn’t like it. I didn’t like the falseness. The fake innocence of such a thing.
Nausea was a real problem as I struggled not to be ill.
She moved toward me.
I couldn’t control my body’s reaction.
I stumbled backward, tripping in my haste. She chased me. I found my footing and crashed against the wall. Just as she’d trapped me in the storeroom, she trapped me in the motel room. Her hands scorched my skin as she tugged at my black T-shirt hem. “Off, please.”
Her politeness teased that perhaps someone sane lurked beneath her sexual deviancy. If I could appeal to that side of her—
“Please. Let me leave. We can forget this happened and—”
“T-shirt. Off. Now.” Her eyes narrowed. “I won’t ask again.”
Olin.
I was doing this for her.
Don’t think about her.
The thought of her in this place.
God.
If she knew what I was doing?
Fuck.
My eyes squeezed tight as my teacher tore my T-shirt off and undid my belt. I didn’t open my eyes as she unbuckled me, unzipped my jeans, and dragged both my underwear and pants to the floor.
I groaned in torture as she ducked before me, untying my boots and easing them off my feet before pulling my trousers off.
Her hot breath skated over my flaccid cock.
I flinched as her hand cupped me, pinching the tip and tutting under her breath. “Well, this is a disappointment.”
My eyes squeezed tighter as she inserted me into her mouth. I jolted against the wall, pushing her head away. “Stop.”
She merely swatted at my touch and hissed around my cock. “Cooperate, or I’ll tie up those pretty wrists and play with you anyway I see fit, okay?”
My hands slowly dropped to my sides.
If it was possible, my cock shrunk inside me, cowering from her mouth.
I tensed for a strike, a slap—for some sort of abusive punishment.
Instead, she stood, laughed a little, and returned to her bag.
Sucking in lungfuls of air, my mind turned dizzy with adrenaline as she lifted two things from the depths.
The first item punched a hole in my chest: a class picture of Olin with her hair neat in a ponytail, her smile conservative, her eyes bright and intelligent.
The second dug my own grave: a box of blue tablets that ensured tonight wouldn’t just break me but would shatter apart any future I hoped to give the girl I loved.
Viagra.
Ms Tallup beamed in her nakedness as I groaned and dropped my head into my hands.
“That’s right. I hid one in the rum that you so sweetly drank for me. In less than an hour, you’ll be as hard as stone and desperate for relief.” She tossed the box back into her bag but put the photo of Olin on the side table. “Might as well place your little girlfriend here, so she doesn’t miss the show.”
The innocent eyes of the girl I loved mocked me while I stood naked in a motel room about to do something unforgivable.
I couldn’t look at her.
Keeping my eyes on the floor, I moved to the bed and collapsed on it.
All my fight dissolved. My anger exhausted me. My refusal to accept this stole all my energy.
Slinging an arm over my eyes, I slammed onto my back, not caring I was stark naked. Not caring my goddamn teacher feasted her eyes on me.
All I cared about was getting this over with so I could go home and forget it ever happened.
Now I knew how my father’s whores felt like.
Something worthless—their only purpose to be hired, abused, then tossed aside with no thought to the emotional aftermath.
For a while, the room was silent and still. Ms Tallup kept her distance.
Time carried us forward, condemning me with every tick-tock.
At one point, she visited the bathroom. Another, the minibar opened and closed again. Minutes passed, heartbeats pounded, and slowly but surely, my body was no longer my own.
Blood gathered outside of my control. Heat and hardness slowly building.
I kept my eyes closed and teeth clenched as the bed shifted and Ms Tallup lay beside me. “Let’s help that Viagra along, shall we?”
I flinched and sucked in a breath as her lips once again surrounded my cock.
I didn’t push her away. I just locked down my heart and endured purgatory.