Sparky’s jaw drops and he stares at Stash with wide, red eyes. Ravage whistles. “Damn.”
Rooster slowly turns and raises an eyebrow at me.
“What?” I shrug. “I knew stoners in high school. That brain teaser used to keep ’em busy for a while.”
He squeezes me close and kisses the top of my head. “Just when I think I can’t possibly love you more, you come up with clown-eating cannibals.”
After dinner, Heidi stands and taps her fork against her water glass.
Worried she’s about to draw more attention to my new patch, I sink down in my chair.
When the chatter doesn’t subside, Murphy stands and claps his big bear paws together. “Settle the fuck down. My wife has news to share.”
Oh! This isn’t about me. I sit up, eager for Heidi’s announcement.
A hush falls over the room. Murphy takes his seat and wraps his arm around Heidi’s legs, casually leaning back and daring anyone to open their mouth. “Go ahead.”
Heidi’s cheeks flush but her eyes sparkle as she rests her hand over her stomach. “We’re having a baby!”
“Congratulations!” Lilly jumps up and runs over to hug Heidi.
“Aw, congratulations!” I clap with everyone else. I lean into Rooster. “I knew it!”
My gaze lands on Teller since I know Heidi had been worried about his reaction, but he’s focused on Charlotte. They share a few words but she shakes her head and leaves the table, quickly walking into the kitchen.
“Is she okay?” I ask Rooster.
“I don’t know.”
Whatever it is, Teller tears his gaze away from the kitchen door. He stands and rounds the table, smiling broadly when he reaches his sister.
“Come here.” He hugs her tight. “Congratulations.”
“Are you ready for another niece or nephew?” she asks.
“Absolutely.” He hugs Murphy next, thumping him on the back with brotherly affection.
“You and Charlotte need to hurry and catch up.” Ravage slaps Teller’s side.
Teller squeezes his eyes shut.
“Shut up,” Murphy snaps, shoving Rav away.
While most of the club surrounds Heidi for hugs and congratulations, Murphy slips away and into the kitchen.
After the excitement dies down, the girls congregate at one end of the table, while the guys cluster around the other end.
“Congratulations,” one of the unattached girls says to me.
“Thank you.” I blink trying to remember her name.
“Lala,” she reminds me. “We only met briefly last time you visited.”
Right! The one who doesn’t know who Dolly Parton is.
“Hey. How’ve you been?”
“Not too bad.”
Another girl bumps Lala aside, staring me up and down. She nods to my patch. “That seems awfully soon, huh?”
I don’t care for her tone. “And you are…?”
“Bonnie. I’ve known Rooster for a while. Never thought he’d patch a girl.”
The way she says known sounds way too carnal for my taste.
I shrug, pretending to be easy-breezy. “Well, he didn’t patch a girl, he patched his woman.”
“I’m not surprised at all.” Anya titters with laughter and hugs me. “Congratulations. I know what a big deal this is.”
“Thank you.” I pull away and wiggle my eyebrows. “You came with Ice. Any movement in that department?”
She blushes and ducks her head. “Nope. Told you that’s never happening.”
Maybe I shouldn’t poke at that topic. I can’t help wanting everyone to be as happy as I am, though.
Heidi and Trinity easily pull Anya into our group conversation, pushing her in the chair next to Charlotte.
Bonnie throws a stink-eye at Anya as if she stole her thunder or something.
The club girls in Washington got a little catty with me, so it’s probably a similar situation here. Anya’s even more of an outsider.
I lean in closer to Lilly. “What’s Bonnie’s deal?”
“Who knows.” She shrugs. “I’m not even sure why she’s here tonight.”
“Anya,” Ravage leans over the back of her chair. “If you’re ever looking for any co-stars, I happen to know a few well-endowed gentlemen who’ll be happy to assist.” His professional tone is completely undermined by the smirk on his lips.
“That’s a sweet offer,” Anya says. “But I’m not allowed to use any of the brothers in my productions.” She scrunches her nose into a sorry-not-sorry expression. “Ice’s rules.”
Swan snickers into her hand. “Perfect.”
Rav isn’t discouraged, though. He shrugs and saunters over to a chair not far from us. Z smacks the back of his head.
“Do you get a lot of offers like that?” Heidi asks quietly.
“God, yes. My inbox is full of unsolicited dick pics. I don’t even check my email anymore.”
“Why is that even a thing?” Heidi asks. “How is an anonymous knob a great conversation starter?”
All of us giggle.
“Anonymous knob sounds like a great band name,” Trinity says.
“Most of them…aren’t even that great,” Anya says, returning to the knob discussion. “I don’t even know why they’re so eager to show them off.”
“Humiliation kink?” Lilly suggests.
Anya giggles. “Maybe.”
“There ya go. Start charging them for sending dick pics,” I tease. “Rooster! You can set that up, right?”
His confused eyes meet mine. “What, chickadee?”
Anya laughs even harder. “Never mind.”
“I hear you,” I say to Anya. “Unfortunately, I receive more than my fair share of thumb-pinkies in my email.”
“Thumb-pinky?” Heidi wiggles her thumb in front of her face. “What the hell, Shelby?”
“I dunno.” I shrug. “Some look like a thumb.”
“Even the big ones are kind of a yawn, you know?” Anya says. “They’re so proud about something that’s just genetics. Like, they literally have no control over it, so it’s not some great accomplishment.”
“Oh my God,” Lala says. “I never thought of it that way, but it’s so true.”
“Right?” Anya’s eyes widen. “Size isn’t the only factor. The biggest dick in the world doesn’t matter if he doesn’t know what to do with it.”
“Yup,” I agree. “He still needs to investigate and find out where all your tingly spots are.”
Charlotte giggles. “Tingly spots?”
“Heck, yeah. Not every girl’s built the same.”
“I feel like I should be writing this down,” Ravage says.
“You probably need to,” Wrath agrees.
“Good point, Shelby.” Lilly stabs her finger in the air in front of her a few times. “Ramming it in a bunch of times doesn’t feel great when they’re hung like a donkey.”
“Absolutely,” Anya agrees, rising from the table. She raises her arms over her head and rolls her hips in a slow circle. “A man who knows how to swivel his hips the right way can accomplish so much more than just a big tool.”