Peter nodded, ducking his head and rubbing his hand over the back of his hair. He gripped his neck before dropping and lifting his head again. “I’ll do that. You’re right. I’ve let things go lax since his mother died.” His voice grew thick. “I won’t do that anymore.”
Then we sat there in silence.
I didn’t feel I needed to say anything, to explain myself, to prove myself. Perhaps call me cocky, but I felt my record spoke for itself. And him … He’d already shared enough. Maybe it was good enough for the first real talk between us?
“I’m not going anywhere.” He needed to know. I spoke up, my chin lifting almost defiantly. “Just so you know. I ain’t going nowhere.” Grammar be damned. I spoke from the heart. “Matt. Seraphina. Cyclone. They’re my family.”
Kash.
I was staring back at him, daring him to challenge me.
His mouth curved up and he nodded. “I wouldn’t let you go anyway.” He nodded again before standing. “I have more to say, but we can talk another time. I think we should talk often, actually.” He started for the door behind me, but paused and pointed to my computer. “Calhoun has his own team. Every search you’ve done for him, I promise that he knows it’s you. And he’s reading enough from it if you don’t cover your tracks. He’ll know you care for his grandson. He’ll know your skill level, and he’ll know where you are every time you search.”
Why, I oughta … I straightened to my fullest height. My pride was hurting. “I’ve been covering my tracks. I had a whole program running to throw every IP address it can think of to block them.”
“It won’t be enough.” He gave me a sad smile. “You’re not the first to try and battle Calhoun like that. I’ve been warring with the man for twenty years now, ever since I met Kash’s parents. And when I say that man isn’t like anyone else you’ve handled, I mean it. You can do what you can against him, but it won’t be enough. I know it. Calhoun knows it.” He quieted a moment. “Kash knows it. If you want to help take him down, let Kash take the lead. He knows his grandfather the best. He’s the only one who has a chance at beating him. Trust me on that. Trust Kash on that.”
Trust Kash on that.
He said my man’s name in a tone like I didn’t know my own man.
I gazed down at the laptop screen after he left, an icon blinking, giving me Calhoun Bastian’s location, and I sighed, turning it off. All of it.
Maybe he was right. Maybe not.
What I did give him credit for was that he’d been playing this game a lot longer than me, and this was for Kash. I cared too much to be reckless. And with that in mind—and with the whole conversation between my father and me, which was letting me walk with my head a little higher, with an extra bounce in my foot, with a little less weight on my shoulder—I went in search of my man.
I went in search of my family.
FIFTY
“You talked.”
It came out as an accusation, from my own mother. She was sneering as she said it. The pool was in an uproar, as Matt’s friends had just arrived, and I tuned all of them out.
“What are you talking about?”
“You and your father.” She was full-on sneering at me. It wasn’t even slight. It was covering her whole face. “You and he talked. I can read it on you.” She hiccupped to herself, turning away. “Damn shame.”
“Hey!” I snapped. “He’s my father. It was about time he came to me, and you know it. I don’t get why you’re all pissed about it. He said you chewed him out for ignoring me.”
She stopped, then huffed. “I did, but…” She half turned away, dropping her voice low. “Just don’t forget about your mama, okay?”
Oh, God.
I reached for her, but she stepped away and grabbed Cyclone up as he was running by. He laughed, trying to pull away, and the two were in a game of tag within seconds. She was darting, veering around everyone, and somehow Seraphina ended up pushed into the pool. Cyclone pivoted back and pushed my mom in as she was extending a hand to Ser, then jumped in over them.
He was happy.
Seraphina was happy, too.
Glancing over the pool, I saw Quinn smiling fondly at both of them, too. Then her face tightened up when my mom’s head popped back up, and her head lifted, finding me across the pool. Her smile faded completely and, her shoulders stiffening, she headed inside the house.
“You’re temporary, you know.”
Damn.
I turned. Victoria had sidled up next to me, and—bully for her—I just now realized I had pulled back until I was standing in the corner. No one was within hearing distance. She got me. But wait. No. Bully for me. She’d been pissed about me since the beginning. I had a gut feeling it was always about Kash, with everyone saying he was her ex, but maybe it was time I found out.
I sighed. “What’s your problem with me?”
She grinned, holding a wineglass in hand. “Just one?”
She’d darkened her hair so it looked like a sunset, a wheat blond mixing in with bright highlights. Long limbs. Long legs. A pastel yellow tunic, sheer enough that her white bikini could be seen, ended just over the tops of her legs. She didn’t wear shorts, just her bikini bottoms. Her heels were high, but sparkly and pink. Sunglasses covered her eyes, and she had a slight smattering of lip gloss coating her mouth.
I didn’t rise to her bait. “How long did you and Kash date?”
Her eyebrows shot up. I’d caught her off guard. But she recovered quickly, shifting back on her heels and saying smoothly, “We were together for two years.” She hesitated before plunging forward. “But I’ve known him forever.”
I was trying to see it. I was.
I was trying to run the math in my head of Kash with her, but I couldn’t see it. This was a conversation I should run by Kash, not her. I’d seen too much to know I shouldn’t believe whatever she had to say. I wasn’t a jealous person, though I could feel intimidated, pushed down.
I’d just feel hurt, not anger.
Which was happening now, slightly, because there was a small voice in the back of my head wondering why he picked me.
I tuned back in to what Victoria was saying.
“Kash and I are meant to be together. Everyone knows it. Why do you think Quinn has me come over for Seraphina?” She was so haughty as she was talking. “I’m family. Already. He’ll get tired of you. You’re just a novelty to him, a brand-new shiny toy. Trust me; he’ll come back to me. He always does.” She sounded so assured.
But I still couldn’t see it because he had not once looked at her, not ever. If Victoria’s name was mentioned, he never even paused.
He would have. There would’ve been a look, if he had cared, if she was the one he was meant to be with. So I told her my thoughts.
The look on her face. Dark and stormy.
“You don’t know anything.” She lowered her head, almost hissing under her breath. “They’ll all get tired of you, and they’ll remember why you weren’t brought into the family in the first place. There’s a reason you were kept a secret. Once the press stops giving a shit about you—and that’ll happen too—you’ll be shipped back to where you came from. Everyone will forget you. Matt. Seraphina. Cyclone. They’ll all move on, continue with their lives, because you’re beneath them. You’re a secret. You aren’t worthy of this family.”