"I'm just letting you be honest. You seem to be on a roll so you might as well keep going."
She sighs, shaking her head. "Just forget it."
"No. I want to hear it. What else do I do that bothers you?"
"Nate, just stop. I don't want to fight."
The waiter comes over and drops off our food. "Need anything else?"
"No, we're good," I tell him.
He walks off and I grab the syrup before Riley can get it. I'm mad at her. Again. I know I shouldn't be, but I am, and I think it's more about last night than about her telling me I lecture her, although that, too, makes me mad. I'm trying to help her. I'm not lecturing her.
"What happened to you, Nate?" Riley asks as she spreads butter on her French toast.
"What do you mean?" I set the syrup down a little too hard and she looks up, our eyes meeting. She can see my anger. I'm trying to hide it, but I can't.
Why am I being this way? I'm never been like this with her. Last night changed things between us, but we can't go on this way. I want us to go back to how we used to be.
But it might be too late for that.
Chapter Twelve
Riley
This isn't the Nate I know. Angry. Moody. Snapping at me. This is a side of Nate I've never seen.
Last night changed things between us and I don't know how to get us back to normal. I'm not even sure it's possible now that I know how Nate feels about me. We'll continue being friends, but he'll still see me as more than that. As the girl he wants to date but can't.
Even before he told me how he felt, I knew something was off with him. I noticed it as soon as he got back from college. He was looking at me differently, holding my hand more, and if I even glanced at another guy, he seemed annoyed. It didn't make sense then, but it does now.
Nate always said our friendship would never change, but part of me knew it would. It started to last summer when he kept telling me to take online classes. He wants me to get more education so I can get a better job. But I don't want to take classes, and as my friend, he should support me in that, not judge me. Same goes for this situation with my mom. Instead of just letting me talk about it, he tells me what to do. The Nate I knew a few years ago would never do that. He'd just listen and give me a hug.
"Riley," Nate says, getting my attention. "Are you going to explain what you meant or keep giving me the silent treatment?"
"I'm not giving you the silent treatment," I say, shoving a forkful of French toast in my mouth. I love Linny's French toast but can't even enjoy it with all the tension between us.
"You're not saying anything."
"Because I don't want to fight."
"We're not fighting. We're having a discussion."
"Then I'd rather not discuss anything right now."
"Riley, c'mon. Just finish what you were saying. You asked what happened to me, right?"
"Just forget it." I drizzle more syrup over my toast.
Nate takes the syrup from me and sets it down. "What happened to me is I fell in love. And when you're in love, you want to do everything you can to make that person happy. That's all I was doing, Riley. When I was giving you advice about your mom? I thought I was helping you. Making things better. I wasn't trying to lecture you."
I just nod and continue eating.
"Riley, talk to me. I'm sorry I got angry just now. I guess I'm still upset about last night."
My eyes lift to his. "Then talk to me when you're done being upset."
"It's more the hurt than the anger making me act this way. It may be a while before that goes away."
"Then either stop talking to me until it does or stop taking it out on me."
He sighs. "You're right."
"Meaning what?"
"Maybe we need some time apart until I can stop acting this way."
"How much time do you need?"
"I don't know. Maybe a few days? The problem is, it's hard for me to even imagine going a couple days without talking to you. I don't think I can do it." He sets his fork down. "How about this? We take tonight off. We don't go out. Don't talk. And then tomorrow we talk again, but if I'm being an ass, you call me on it so I know I'm doing it."
I half-smile. "Like an ass alert?"
"Exactly. You can even call it that."
I reach my hand across the table. "Deal."
He shakes my hand and we finish our breakfast, the conversation turning to movies we want to see.
Maybe we'll be able to make this work. For a moment I thought our friendship would end right here at the table, but we always work things out. There's no reason this time should be any different.
When we get to the pool, I'm feeling much better about the Nate situation. I'm even smiling as I go in the locker room to change.
"What's with the smile?" Giada asks when she sees me walking in.
"Nate and I aren't fighting anymore."
"You guys talked?" She shuts her locker and walks over to mine.
"Yeah." I open my locker and shove my backpack in it. "He took me to breakfast this morning and apologized for how he acted last night."
"So everything's good? You're back to being friends?"
"I wouldn't say we're back to normal, but we're getting there."
"See? It's like I told you, he just needed some time." She pulls her hair up in a ponytail and secures it with a band.
"Hey, um, don't tell anyone about this. I don't think Nate wants people knowing."
"That he's in love with you?"
"Shhh." I look around the empty locker room. "Someone might hear."
"I'm pretty sure everyone already knows."
I shut my locker door and turn to her. "How would they know?"
"By the way he's always looking at you. He even got in trouble for it."
"He did? When?"
"A couple times last week. TJ said if he catches him again, he'll get written up, which could lead to suspension."
"Nate never told me that." I open my locker and grab my swimsuit. "So there's another reason he's mad at me. I got him in trouble at work."
"You just said you guys aren't fighting anymore."
"We're not, but I can tell he's still upset with me for not reacting the way he wanted."
"It's not your fault he's in love with you. And who cares if he's upset? He'll get over it. Just like he'll get over you dating Brad. Guys can be so stupid sometimes. They let their—"
"Wait. What did you just say?"
"I said guys let their pride get in the way, which makes them do stupid things."
"No. Before that. Something about Brad."
"Oh. I was saying that Nate will have to get over you dating Brad."
"I'm not dating Brad. YOU are." I nervously laugh, not wanting her—or anyone else—to know how much I like Brad. Or that I kissed him! "You were just out with Brad last night."
She rolls her eyes. "Believe me, that wasn't a date. It's not like it was horrible. We got along okay. There just wasn't any romance between us."