Sebastian bristled, his brow knitting.
“Don’t give me that look. I don’t pity you, Sebastian. I just want what’s best for you.”
Except that Sebastian suspected that Ben did pity him, regardless of the things he’d accomplished.
“Go ahead and ask Leah out,” Ben said. “I won’t stand in the way.”
Sebastian stared at him with disbelief. “Like I said, even if she does want to be with me, I can’t be with her if it’s going to make you unhap—”
“Good grief. Can you stop being so bullheaded for one minute?”
Sebastian supposed the question was rhetorical.
Exasperated, Ben shook his head. “I really do deserve a medal for putting up with you all this time.”
This statement, too, seemed rhetorical.
“You might not have noticed, but I’m no longer someone you have to defend,” Ben said. “I’m a grown man, and I can deal with pain.”
“But—”
“Men fall for women all the time who don’t end up feeling the same way about them. The fact that Leah doesn’t want to date me isn’t going to ruin me.”
Sebastian set his jaw.
“I’m trying to give you my blessing,” Ben said. “The only thing I’m worried about is whether or not you’re ready to open yourself up to a real relationship. Are you?”
“I don’t think she’s going to want to date me, let alone get into a serious relationship with me.”
“That’s a non-answer.”
“It’s all I’ve got. I honestly don’t know what I’m ready for.”
“She’s my friend. So I don’t want you to insult her or me by keeping her at arm’s length like you’ve done with your past girlfriends.”
“I don’t think she’s going to want to date me,” Sebastian repeated.
“I think she will want to date you. But she’s not like the others.” Ben considered him. “I have to believe that you’re not going to be able to hold back your feelings with her, even if you try.” Ben pulled out his keys. “In fact, between you and Leah, you’re probably the one in need of prayer.”
A text arrived from Ben’s mom, CeCe, the following morning while Sebastian was running.
I’m going to be working in the garden for the next two hours. Come see me.
Sebastian read her message on the smart watch he wore while exercising. Sweat ran down his face. His shirt stuck to his skin in wide patches.
He’d intended to mow his lawn after this. But now he’d shower and Uber to the Colemans. A message like this from CeCe was equivalent to a command from the president.
You did not—could not—say no.
CeCe got right to the point when he arrived at her side. She was harvesting broccoli from her vegetable garden, located in a raised planting bed that ran along one side of her home. “Ben tells me that you’re interested in Leah and that Leah’s interested in you.”
Surprise made him unsure what to say. In telling his mom about the situation with Leah, Ben had made a strategic move. Ben would have known that CeCe would get involved immediately. He’d wanted that either as a way of showing Sebastian that he’d meant what he’d said last night or as a way of shutting the door for good on his own hopes for a romance with Leah. Or both.
“If Ben thinks she’s interested, then she almost certainly is,” CeCe stated. “But of course you’re concerned about dating her because Ben has liked her for so long.”
“Yes.”
“That’s kind of you, Sebastian.”
“Thank you—”
“But stupid.” She straightened. Gardening gloves covered the hands she set on her round waist. “If you like that woman, go after her with everything you’ve got. Marriage and family—that’s the hardest stuff of life. But it’s also the very best stuff. So you’re a fool if you pussyfoot around Ben’s feelings and miss your chance.”
“He’s your son.”
She shoved his shoulder. “You’re my son, too.” Her glare dared him to contradict her. “Ben will be just fine.”
He said nothing.
“Go after her,” CeCe demanded.
“I want to.”
“Then do.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“No, it’s not simple. Neither is medical school. But you did that, didn’t you?”
A smile cracked across his face.
She knelt and yanked several carrots from the soil. She brushed one off and handed it to him. “Eat that.”
“Ma’am?”
“Eat it. You look skinny.”
He wasn’t skinny. Dirt stuck to the carrot, but he knew that CeCe believed the dirt was good for them. He’d offend her if he cleaned off his carrot more than she’d cleaned off the one she was eating. The bite he took crunched between his teeth.
“I hope you don’t think you owe Ben or any of the rest of us anything, Sebastian.”
“You’re kidding, right? I owe you guys everything.”
She shot him a slit-eyed stare. “Like what, exactly?”
He hesitated. “I wouldn’t have any success or any family if it weren’t for you.”
“Bull. You earned your success yourself, every day, with every paper and assignment and test and patient. Now, we did pull you into our family—and hardly gave you much choice in the matter, that’s true enough. But the love we have for you was, is, and always will be free. Totally free. There are no debts between us. Do you understand me?”
He’d lost count of the times CeCe had belligerently asked him, “Do you understand me?” over the course of his life.
“Do you understand me, Sebastian?” she repeated, when he didn’t answer quickly enough.
“Yes.”
“Then, c’mere.” She tugged him down so she could kiss his cheek. “Go on now and steal the heart of that girl,” she whispered.
Sauntering toward the back door, she pulled off her gloves. Then turned. “What’re you waiting for? Chop chop. I’ve got about ten chores for you to do inside.”
Since May, Sebastian had been in an almost constant bad mood over the way things stood between him, Leah, and Ben. Yet at least the way things stood had made sense to him. He couldn’t make sense of the encouragement that Ben and CeCe had given him regarding Leah.
He’d felt rotten every time he’d thought about the possibility of Ben and Leah as a couple. It had to be the same for Ben when Ben thought about him and Leah together—yet Ben had taken the noble course. Ben always took the noble course. Ben had been raised in an environment that nurtured nobility. Sebastian had been raised in an environment that nurtured survival.
Five days after his conversation with CeCe, his phone alerted him to an incoming text message. He should have gone home for the day a few hours ago, but he was still in his office, trying to catch up on work.
He focused on the screen through eyes gritty with weariness. It was Ben.
Have you asked Leah out yet?
No.
If you won’t at least try to win her over, I’m going to be mad.