Fear fluttered in my heart. “Being my husband?”
“No.” A half of a laugh slipped out of him. “You telling me what to do, exactly how you wanted it.” He softened back into me and his lips brushed over the shell of my ear. “Every dirty, nasty thing you like.”
The idea of it sucked all the air from my body and heat flooded in its place.
I wanted this now too. His fantasy became mine in an instant. Excitement twisted inside my center like a screw being tightened, and my voice dipped low. “What dirty, nasty things do I like?”
He didn’t miss a beat. “Oh, all sorts of stuff.” He grinned wickedly. “You’ve got a filthy fucking mind.”
I swallowed thickly. “I do.”
“So,” his teeth grazed against the side of my neck, “tell me how you want it.”
This question was exhilarating and a little scary, because it was him handing all of the power between us to me. Given the keys to the kingdom, my mind raced with ideas. All I had to do was vocalize my desires, but which one to lead with?
“Well,” I sucked in a breath and tried to sound strong, “I don’t want it here, up against the stairs in my entryway.”
Amusement glinted in his eyes. “Where, then?”
I pushed off the wall, wordlessly asking him to follow me. Thankfully, my undone pants stayed up around my hips, making it possible to walk through the living room and into my bedroom. I flipped on the bedside lamp and when my gaze fell to the end table, I zeroed in on the brass drawer pull. Until recently, that drawer had contained all my devices of pleasure, but my new, best one was currently standing near the foot of the bed waiting for direction.
“Have a seat on the bed,” I requested.
He did, but his focus was pinned on me. He watched intently as I sauntered to him and placed my hands on his broad shoulders.
“You said you’d be my personal sex toy.” It was shocking how seductive my own voice sounded to me. “That I could use you however I want.” I coasted my hands down his chest as I lowered onto a knee between his legs. “So, I plan to.”
He took in an enormous breath, his eyes hazed, and he parted his thighs wider to give me more room. My intent was clear, and he was absolutely on board with it. Troy put his hands on the bed behind him and leaned back, staring at me as I skimmed my palms painstakingly slow over the front of his jeans.
Although he was positioned to make it easy on me, I still struggled to undo the button at the top, and then he had a hand there to help.
“No,” I said softly. “I want to do it.”
Because there was satisfaction in doing it. Not just the physical pleasure of my hand’s teasing brush, either. It was the same satisfaction of unwrapping a present when you already knew what it was, but you wanted it so badly, you were just as excited anyway.
A smile tilted his lips, and he settled back on his arms. “Okay.”
He let out a heavy breath when I inched his zipper down and explored the rapidly hardening length of him beneath his underwear. I cupped my hand and massaged, enjoying the quiet groan from him. It was louder the second time when I settled on my knees, curled my fingers under the waistband and lifted, freeing his erection.
“Can I ask you something?” I whispered it as I wrapped my fingers around him.
His chin tipped up to the ceiling, like he was regrouping, and then his gaze locked onto me. “Anything.”
It was a simple word, but it carried so much meaning. As if whatever I asked, he’d not only do, but he also wouldn’t judge.
He shuddered as I tightened my grip, slid it up to close around the tip, then pushed my fist all the way down to the base of him. White-hot desire seared through me. Would I ever get used to my touch bringing someone else pleasure? I wanted to keep him here forever and watch every sigh he made. Find out if his moans had a melody to them.
“I’m on birth control,” I said, “and I got tested when I found out Clark had been unfaithful. I’m clean.”
Troy’s lips parted to say something, but nothing came out. He blinked, unsure.
“Are you?” I asked.
“Clean?” He nodded. “Yeah. I’m careful.”
I was inclined to believe him. He took such good care of himself physically, it seemed unlikely he’d risk his health and his body like that. I stroked my fist over him and watched the hurried rise and fall of his chest.
“Good,” I said. “And what we’re doing . . . you’re not doing it with anyone else, right?”
“No.” He peered at me like it was a question I didn’t need to ask. “Trust me. I’m not going to fuck around on you, Erika.”
This was harder to believe, but I wanted to. His expression was full of conviction. “What about you?” He strove for a teasing tone, but I heard the truth beneath. “Are you doing this with anyone else besides me?”
Now it was my turn to give him the look that said his question wasn’t needed. “You know I’m not.”
“Cool.” He licked his lips, savoring how I was touching him. “Glad we figured that out.” His voice was tight with need. “Curious about why you said you’re on birth control.”
I wanted to laugh. I’d told him that for a reason, and he was eager to confirm his suspicions.
“Because I was going to ask, if I said I was okay to go without condoms—”
“You want me to fuck you raw?”
All the moisture in my body flooded directly between my legs at his vulgar language. For all his ‘yes, ma’am’s, he didn’t talk like a gentleman in the bedroom, and my mind responded enthusiastically to it, as did my body. I didn’t want proper, respectable sex with a gentleman.
I hungered for something . . . darker.
Primal, basic fucking.
Through the connection of our gazes, I didn’t need to use words to tell him my answer was yes. I parted my lips, lowered into his lap, and closed my mouth around the head of his dick.
Air left his body in a hiss through his clenched teeth. The sound was pleasure so acute, it was nearly killing him.
His skin was so soft against my tongue, yet firm as steel. I traced circles, swirling my tongue over the tip before pushing farther down on him. Every trick I could think of to maximize his enjoyment, I threw at him. I used my fingers to ring his cock and pumped them in time with my lips. I sucked so hard, it hollowed out my cheeks. He gasped and moaned as we both found pleasure in what I was doing. It was uncomfortable for my jaw because he was so fucking hard, but I didn’t slow down.
I was so lost in my desire, once again I didn’t heed his warning signs. I didn’t pay attention to the way the cadence of his breathing changed, or how his moans went short and sharp. Not even his dick pulsing and throbbing inside my mouth was enough to get me to stop.
It was his hand gently grasping the side of my face that got me to ease back. I looked up at him, stunned to see how he struggled for control. It looked like he was finishing a marathon. Determined and focused, but also laboring to find air.
“You’re, like, really good at that.” His smile was tight. “I don’t want to ruin your fun, but . . . I’m not going to last long if you keep at it.”
I went back to using my hand, gliding my fingers teasingly over his dick that was wet with my saliva. “You think it’ll be easier when you’re all bare inside me?”