“Fuck, I’m not going to last.”
“Good.” I get back to work, fisting his cock in my hand, loving the way my won arousal seems to build with his.
Suddenly, Julian pulls out of my mouth, then he pulls me up. I’m on the bed in a flash.
“I won’t come anywhere bit inside you the first time, Mia,” he states above me, stripping me out of my clothes with quick, deft movements then he quickly slips three fingers into my pussy and I gasp. “I want to kiss every inch of you. I want to worship you, Mia. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, baby. Tell me you understand that.”
All I can do is nod. I’m panting and he’s fucking me with his fingers. Before I can think about it, the orgasm builds and then he pulls me over the edge with a soft massage to my clit, applying just enough pressure to trigger another orgasm.
Fuck.
“I need to be in you,” he says, removing his shirt and tearing at my bra. “I need this, baby.”
“Yes.”
Julian sucks at my breasts, touching me everywhere, making me feel alive in a way I haven’t felt since he fucked me on my twentieth birthday. But in a way, this is more. So much more.
He’s hard as stone, I’ve never seen him so aroused, and it makes me so fucking hot, there’s a sheen of sweat coating my body now.
“I love you so much, baby,” Julian declares. “I loved you when I hated you. I loved you when you enraged me and loved you every fucking day since.”
Tears. They come back all over again.
“I love you too, Julian,” I croak, pulling him down over me. I love his weight. I love the way he makes me feel like nothing can touch me.
“Like I said, baby,” he whispers almost cruelly above me. “You’ll love me even if it kills us.”
Yes.
His cock swells even further, with the thick veins standing out along its beautiful length.
“I love your mouth,” he whispers above me. “We’ll revisit and revise but for now, take me deep baby.”
Like before, I do as I’m told.
When he thrusts into me, that first lunge, both our jaws drop open on a silent gasp.
He dares me to close my eyes or look away, but I can’t, held transfixed with the play of lust, love and fierce longing in his gaze as he looks down at me.
My hips roll on their own volition, as we fall into a deep, fast, hard rhythm.
Maybe we’re desperate. Maybe all the games of chance we played did us dirty.
There was me jumping into the fire to save him and him walking through literal flames to get me out of that mess.
Me faking amnesia to clear his name, him sacrificing everything to do what he never wanted to do, just to make sure he owned the contract and not some old perv out there.
Julian is my everything and he fucks me I can’t help but thank the universe for bring us here.
And now, I’m looking up into the greenest eyes ever, grinding my slick sex to his pelvis as he fucks me. I’m moaning uncontrollably, my core trembling with massive waves of pleasure but all I can whisper, all I can get out as I look up at him, surrendering my life are three words.
“Julian, kiss me.”
And he, surprise, surprise, does exactly what he’s told.
With a little Julian twist of torturing me, of course.
I couldn’t have it any other way.
Epilogue
Julian
I can count on one hand the times I’ve been truly and utterly fucked.
One of those times was when Cole and I set fire to one of my Dad’s buildings and the parking lot camera clearly recorded us pulling down our masks. Say what you will about John, but the man could’ve handed over the tape to the cops and we would’ve been sent to juvie, with a. cute ‘arson’ to go with our rep sheet, but he didn’t.
The other was when Cole and I ditched my brother, Liam, at Disneyland for five straight hours only to find him with security, eating every junk food in sight to cover the fact that he had peed himself, Dad was fury personified with that one.
But the biggest one by far was when I saw Mia.
Yes, Dad told me about the trip to Paris and to be honest, I wasn’t surprised to hear I kissed her then.
There’s just something about Mia that calls out the most primal instincts in me until all I want is to possess her, to make her mine, to make her aware of me.
And all that boils down to this moment right here. I’m in the only part of the new house that I’ve kept hidden from Mia until now.
I didn’t want to show it her if there was a chance that she was going to fight me—and lose, but a lot of decisions that I make during the day, the last thoughts I have at night, it’s all determined by the very look on Mia’s face.
When she’s pissed, I fucking love it. She’s tiny so when she gets feisty like a little firecracker, I know she’ll ride me long and hard.
When she’s all soft and pliable, I know that’s when she holds on to me, not wanting me to slip out of bed so I can get to work. She wraps her legs around my torso and whispers for me to fuck her and fuck me.
I’ve fallen victim to her wishes, surrendering to her in every way possible.
The shit I do now is different from what I imagined before. ‘Work’ means something else totally different. There are some days that she asks what I actually do at Phoenix Corps, then there are days when she just takes one look at me and she just knows.
Those are my least favorite days.
I hate that it only takes her one glance, and she can unravel me. It’s like she can sees the shit I do.
I don’t want to taint her. I don’t want to hurt her like that, so today, I’m showing her this room and giving her choices. The choices I never gave her when I finally got her back because eat the time, there was no way I could go on without her.
“Julian?” I hear her call again. She’s getting closer. The moment I catch a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror though, my breath catches in my fucking chest. It’s dark, with the only light shining down on me and nothing else. “Julian, are you in here?”
I’m tongue-tied in a heartbeat as I watch her stride into the room full of mirror, wearing nothing but the football jersey I was supposed to wear when I finally got on the field to play for the Stanford Cardinals with Cole. But as fucking fate—which is really hate in my fucking ledger—would have it, the week I was supposed to go, we got back from Europe and my world came collapsing around me. I never thought I’d see that jersey with my number and my name blazed across the back but here it is, on the best person who could ever wear it.
“I’m here,” I say, but she hears me.
“There you are,” she says, a breathtaking smile on her face. God, she’s so beautiful sometimes it hurts to look at her. It hurts NOT to look at her. “What’s wrong?”
“Where did you get that?”
“Oh this? I’ve had it for a while,” she says, looking down at the jersey.
“What?”
“Cole gave me this when I moved to Massachusetts for college,” she mutters, studying me carefully. “I guess he thought it would help me through.”
Fuck. Just when I thought I could never love this girl any more than I already do, she goes and does something like this.