I close my eyes, a wave of both gratitude and dismay washing through me. I hate that he felt he couldn’t talk about things to anyone else, that people might have ridiculed him for it. But I’m glad he felt that way with me. “You never judged me either,” I whisper. “Even when other guys thought I was too…aggressive. You never did.”
“I love how strong you are.”
“Thank you.” I deliver another long kiss.
“But I didn’t share enough with you,” he continues. “I should have stayed and talked to you about how I was feeling instead of bolting.”
“Yes. You should have.” Dammit, I might cry again. I never cry. “I love you Hunter, but if we’re going to be together you have to promise me that you’ll stay and talk, no matter how hard it is.”
Our eyes meet and hold. I feel his gaze looking deep inside me and I let him see my feelings…and I read the love shining through in his. “I promise.” He takes my hand and presses it to his chest above his heart. “Roberta told me that by avoiding or ignoring my past—which I was by refusing to play for the Bears—it was still giving my past power over me. I thought I could keep it in the past, but the truth is, I can’t.”
I nod.
“I have to accept that. I have to be comfortable with it, and then it won’t have as much power over me.” He hesitates. “Are you comfortable with that? That it will always be part of me?”
I have no hesitation. “Yes. I always have been. You should know that.”
“Yeah.” He smiles. “You’re right. So, Roberta said this is a point of change, a turning point, and what worked for me before to get through things might not work this time. She made me realize I had to do something different, and the first thing was to meet with Josh and Easton. Only, they showed up out of the blue.” He pauses. “Or not so much ‘out of the blue.’”
“Are you mad about that?” Anxiety tightens my insides. “I was afraid you’d be angry at me for interfering again. But I had a feeling they were the two people you really needed to talk to.”
“And you were right. I might have been annoyed, but I’d already figured that out. And Josh also told me not to be mad at you because the same thing happened with him and Sara and I guess it almost ended things between them. But it made him and Easton sit down and hash things out, so it was all good.”
“Whew. Okay, great.” I bury my face against his chest. “I was so worried about you.”
He strokes my back. “Thanks. I was worried about you, too. I was afraid not only did I screw up my career, but yours too.” He runs his fingers through my hair. “And I was worried that I hurt you and I hated that. I shouldn’t have said that you can’t fix everything. Apparently, you can.”
I take a deep breath. “No. I can’t. I overstepped big time with you. I’m so sorry, Hunter. I need to stop doing that. I have to step back with my clients and not get so involved in their lives.”
He shifts and cups my face in both hands, looking directly into my eyes. “The fact that you care about your clients makes you a great agent.”
I swallow, my throat thickening at his praise. “I can still care about them. I just need to learn how far to go.”
His smile is so warm and proud it lights up my insides like a goal light flashing red. And I feel kind of proud of myself for coming to this realization. “I love how much you care for your clients and how hard you work to get the best for them. I love how smart you are. I love how nerdy you are about hockey contracts and the CBA. I even love your spreadsheets.”
I choke out a laugh.
“I’m not perfect. I’ll do dumb things, piss you off, then take it all back…but you’ll never find someone who loves you more than I do. I love how you seem all cool and professional on the outside, but inside you’re soft and warm. You encouraged me to go after my dream and helped give me the confidence to do it.”
My heart lodges in my throat and I try to blink away the sting in my eyes.
“You make me smile…from those first days at Bayard, you were the one who made me smile. You also make me horny, but that’s a different issue.”
“Making you smile and making you horny are my two favorite things.”
He grins. “Good.”
“Also, you make me horny, too.”
“I hope we never get tired of making each other horny.” His smile makes my lower belly flip flop. “I love how strong you are. But I also love that you need me…I want to hold your hand and kiss your forehead and stand behind you. I want to beat up anyone who makes you feel bad.”
“No. No fist fights. But thank you. So many guys couldn’t do that. They couldn’t handle that I knew more than them, that I skated better than them.”
“That was their problem. Not yours.”
“I’m glad you understood me. Nobody else did. And Hunter…I love your strength. When I first met you, I thought you were a jerk, but then I saw how you guarded your heart and hid your feelings. I love how you care so much. And I love how you make me slow down and enjoy the moment. Little moments.”
“That’s what life is. A bunch of little moments, all strung together to make up bigger moments and…a life. We need to appreciate every one of those moments.”
I nod, my throat blocked again, remembering him stopping me to appreciate the beauty of the snowfall. The energy of Forty-Second Street. How much he appreciates those moments because of what he went through, and how I’m learning to do that too. I swallow. “I think I need one of those hugs that turns into sex.”
He laughs softly. “Okay.” He nuzzles the side of my neck, making me shiver. “I wanna do bad things with you.”
“Yes please.”
He kisses my mouth, then stands, lifting me with him. My legs wobble and heat floods my entire body as he slides an arm around my waist, then bends and slips the other arm beneath my knees and lifts me into the air. I wrap my arms around his neck, and he carries me into the bedroom.
In the dim room, he lowers me to my feet beside the bed. He takes my face in both hands and kisses me again, a gentle kiss of such devotion, tears spring to my eyes. I lay my palms on his chest, feel his heartbeat thudding beneath one, and give myself up to his endless, sensual kiss.
“So beautiful,” he murmurs, rubbing his rough cheek against mine. “So strong and beautiful.”
“Oh, Hunter.”
He tugs my T-shirt out from the waistband of my skirt, and I raise my arms so he can draw it over my head. I reach behind me for the zipper of the skirt and let it fall to the floor. As I stand before him in my pink lace bra and panties, his eyes darken with appreciation. I feel beautiful and feminine. But also strong.
His hands move over my body, touching me everywhere, leaving trails of heat and sparks in their wake. When they come to rest on my shoulders, he turns my body so I face away from him. I close my eyes as he draws my hair to one side and kisses the back of my neck, and when he opens his mouth and so gently grazes his teeth over my flesh, fire flashes through me. A soft whimper escapes my lips.
He flicks open the fastener of my bra and pushes the straps down my arms, then whisks my panties down and off. Crouching behind me, he pauses for a moment to kiss the small of my back. My knees tremble and my belly heats. Then he pats my butt and says, “Get on the bed.”