It was the fact that he’d used the word sloppy. That was what kept her from insisting. She didn’t mind being a lot of things, but she couldn’t tolerate his thinking she was sloppy.
“I’m not sloppy.” Her voice quavered slightly. “I’m just...”
“Sad. I know. But drinking can only do so much to stop that.”
Once again, it felt like he could read her completely. All the way down to where her deepest secrets lurked. “I’m not sad. You don’t know anything about me.”
“If you say so.”
She didn’t even have the energy to argue with him, although he definitely deserved it. She took a couple of gulps of water. More than half the guests had left the reception now. Only four or five energetic couples were still dancing, and scattered small groups were sitting at tables, nibbling on remaining goodies or talking.
Taylor had left immediately after Stacey and Dave, saying she’d done her duty and could now go home to her dog. She’d asked if Robert wanted to leave with her, but he’d said he was fine.
No matter how infuriating he could be, she was glad he hadn’t left.
She would have been left all alone.
She kind of felt that way regardless. Like she’d lost her sister and her oldest friend and her dreams all on the same day.
“It’s just hard,” she murmured.
“I know it is.”
She turned at the quiet sympathy in his tone. “Have you experienced it? Losing everything you’ve dreamed about?”
His mouth twisted oddly before he replied, “No. I’ve never even let myself dream.”
She thought about that. It wasn’t easy because it felt like every thought she had was being drawn down into a dark pit of obscurity in her head. But she fought through it enough to nod. “That must be easier.”
“It’s supposed to be.”
“So you don’t have any dreams at all?”
He shook his head and glanced away from her. “Not about anything I can’t achieve.”
“Then those aren’t dreams. They’re plans.”
“That sounds about right.”
There was an edge of loss in his tone that she felt deeply. That spoke to her. “Maybe I should be like that. I don’t want to feel like this again.”
“You could try, but I think you’re a dreamer. Not everyone can be a cynical asshole like me.”
“That’s true.” She was so sleepy now that her head fell to one side. When darkness started falling, she popped her eyes open with a jerk. “I wasn’t asleep!”
Robert gave another one of those soft, warm chuckles. “I’d say it was touch-and-go there.”
“I’m not that tired. Just bored now.”
“If you’re bored, you probably want to get out of here.”
“Are you going to leave?”
“I’ve only been waiting for you.”
There was something about the words that made her feel good. Made her feel better. She gave him a fuzzy smile and leaned over toward him to put her head on his shoulder. She wasn’t sure why. It just felt like the thing to do at the moment. His shoulder was farther than she’d anticipated. Her lean turned into a fall. She squealed and flailed as she tried to catch herself.
He reached out to put an arm around her, saving her from the near tumble. “Okay. Now that you’ve almost fallen out of your chair, I think we should head home now.”
“Okay.” She sniffed. “I just need to say bye to my mom.” Her mother was still there, the center of attention at a table of her friends. Her father had left ages ago.
With Robert’s help, she gained her feet. And she managed to walk and talk in a generally sensible manner as she went over to say a few words to her mom and let her know she was leaving.
Robert was waiting for her at the door.
“I don’t think I should drive,” she said as they left the building and stepped into the parking lot.
“Definitely not. I’ll take you home. You can get your car tomorrow.”
“Are you okay to drive?”
“I haven’t had anything to drink for more than two hours now. I’m good.”
She trusted him. He sounded good. He sounded like he knew what he was doing and he could take care of her.
At the moment she needed that since it didn’t feel like she could take care of herself.
She fell asleep on the drive home, waking up only when he opened the passenger door and shook her gently by the shoulder. Then she had to lean on him as he helped her up the front walk and into her townhome.
She’d bought the place a couple of years ago as a new build. It was nice and she kept it neat, so there was nothing to worry about as he helped her down the hall and into her bedroom.
She fell onto the bed, her skirt flouncing around her. “I’m going to sleep in my clothes.”
“If you want. But it wouldn’t be a bad idea to take off your shoes.”
That seemed sensible. She lifted one foot to let Robert slide the heel off and then did the same with the other one.
“Thank you.” Her eyes were closed, so she couldn’t see his expression. She was starting to feel a little weird about his being in her bedroom like this.
“You’re welcome. I’m going to get you some water to put here beside you. Whenever you wake up during the night, drink some.”
“I know what to do when I’ve been drinking.”
“Get drunk a lot, do you?”
“Almost never,” she admitted.
“That’s what I thought.” He disappeared for a little while. Maybe a few seconds. Maybe long, tedious hours. Then he returned with a bottle of water.
“Are you sure you don’t want to get out of that dress?” Robert asked after setting the bottle on her nightstand.
“I do.” She couldn’t seem to move except to open her eyes. “Can you help me?”
He shook his head and leaned over. “You’re kind of a pitiful drunk. You know that, right?”
“I am not pitiful!” In spite of her words, she meekly let him help her unzip and unfasten the skirt. Then pull the bodice off her chest and untangle the skirt from her legs.
She thought his eyes might have slipped down to inspect her body, but he was clearly trying to be a gentleman about it.
It was kind of nice. That he was being that way.
It was nice that someone was nice in this world.
She sniffed as he got an oversized T-shirt out of the drawer she indicated and helped her put it on. When she collapsed back onto the bed, there were tears in her eyes.
“There’s nothing to cry about,” Robert said matter-of-factly.
“Yes, there is. I loved him.”
“It was a dream. It wasn’t love.”
“It was too love!” She forgot about her tears as she mulled over his puzzle. “At least I think it was.”
“It was a dream. It was real to you, but it wasn’t real. There’s a difference. You’ll see that soon enough.”
“I don’t think so. I think I’m going to live the rest of my life with this heartbreak.”
“No, you won’t.”
“How do you know?”
He gave her a little smile. “Because I won’t let you.”