He cups my jaw with one hand, and with the other, he grips his length. “Eyes on me.”
His bossy bedroom behavior is such a turn-on, but with my thighs parted around his calves, I can’t press my legs together to squelch the ache. He uses his hold on my head to tilt my chin up, and I part my lips as he brings the tip to my tongue.
We groan in unison at the first contact, his hot steel against my open mouth. I was never the type of woman who enjoyed performing oral sex. It was always more of an I scratch your back, you scratch mine kind of exchange. But somehow, Alexander makes the act just as arousing for me as it is for him—the way he moves against my tongue, the firm grip on my jaw combined with the gentle swipe of his thumb against my cheek. The sounds of pure ecstasy that fall from his lips mixed with his growls of pleasure as he thrusts between my lips have me squirming in my seat. He’s not a big talker, both in and out of the bedroom, so when he whispers, “You’re beautiful,” my heart nearly melts.
No, no, no, heart. Get your shit together. We cannot afford to melt for this man. All we have is this moment.
The thought of us being temporary makes me bold, and I put my hand over his, gripping his hard-on even tighter. A hiss escapes through his clenched teeth. I up my efforts, swirl my tongue, and increase suction until he sways on his feet.
“Enough.” He pulls away from me and drops to his knees in front of me. His gaze never leaves mine when he grips my thighs and pulls until my ass hangs off the cushion. With thick, rough fingers, he tugs aside my panties and buries his face between my legs.
If not for his hold on my hips, I’d have hit the ceiling at the aggressive way he goes down on me. As if my orgasm was an Olympic sport and he’s after the gold medal for both time and performance. The stimulation is too much. My nerve endings are on overload. I throw my arms out and hold onto the couch as my release slams into me. My lips part on a silent scream, and fireworks explode behind my eyes as he draws out every last bit until I squirm against him.
Before I catch my breath, he drags my hips down, and he slams inside me. I gasp at the quick and delicious fullness as it chases away the drowsiness of my release. He thrusts. Hard. I dig the back of my head into the couch, holding on, as he slams into me again.
His hand slides up between my breasts to my throat, where he holds me in a gentle grip. With every rough surge of his hips, my body strings tighter and tighter. His hand on my throat doesn’t squeeze, but his fingertips search out my pulse point and rest softly there as if to gauge my wellbeing. Or maybe my racing heart turns him on.
His solid thighs are rough against my ass as he continues to move with the force of a man on the hunt. Needing to see him fully, I sit up and lock my hands at his nape to hold on. He keeps one hand on my throat and kisses me with the same force of intrusion that he’s using between my legs.
Closer and closer to the edge he pushes me until finally, I fall.
My orgasm slams into me with double the force of the first. I bury my face in his neck as I fall apart against him. Around him.
He groans, and his hips jerk forward one last time before he collapses over me. My upper back is pressed against the couch while his erection kicks inside me over and over.
We’re both breathing heavy and trying to float back to earth while we hold tight to each other.
Eventually, he pulls his face from my chest with a boyish grin. “We should do this more often.”
“The sex or the date?”
“The date followed by the sex.”
“Agreed.” I kiss him before he can see me frown. Because the thought occurs to me, how many more times will we get to do this if all we are is temporary?
Alexander
“Zander, you got a minute?”
I look up from my computer to see Hudson standing in the open doorway of my office. “Hold on.” I go back to my design, tie up what I was working on, and save it. I turn away from my screen and nod to the seat across from my desk. “Come in.”
Hudson strolls in and takes the seat, his straight, white teeth on display.
I scowl. “What?”
He shrugs. “Oh nothing, just heard through the grapevine that you and Ms. Wilder are really hitting it off.”
“Who told you that?”
He cocks his head and lifts a brow. “Is it true?”
“I suppose.”
“Then why does it matter who told me? I’m happy for you, bro. It’s been a long time since you’ve…” His smile falls, and he clears his throat. “Whatever, I’m just happy to see you’re happy. I mean… this is you happy, yeah?”
I take a mental inventory of my expression—tight jaw, perma-scowl, frown. I can see why he’d be confused. “Happy?” I don’t know if I’m capable of the emotion. I enjoy spending time with Jordan. She’s unlike anyone I’ve ever known, and she seems to like me, which feels nice. I like coming home to her every night, and I really like having sex with her. But happy? I don’t remember the last time I felt happy. Even though things between us are good for now, there is a lingering sense of doom that constantly hangs over me. A feeling that at any minute, I’m going to screw things up, hurt her feelings, or she’ll finally see me for who I really am and leave. It’s only a matter of time. So how can I be happy when I’m constantly having to remind myself to keep a loose grip on her?
Never again can I allow myself to become attached. Because if I do, and she leaves, I won’t be able to control how I respond.
“Can I give you some advice?” Hudson asks, drawing my mind back to the present.
“No.”
He does anyway. “Let yourself have this.”
“This?”
“Yeah. Her. Happiness. You’ve paid your dues. It’s been ten years. You can’t punish yourself forev—”
“That’s enough.” Every muscle in my body is tense, and my shoulders bunch in preparation to throw something. Anything.
He sighs and leans back in his chair.
“What do you want? I need to get back to work.”
Disappointment pinches his expression. “The Times is running an article on the event this weekend, and they want a quote.”
“You’re the PR guy,” I say with a thin hold on my restraint. “Do your job.”
His brows pinch into a scowl, making him look so much more like his twin. “No shit, but they’re asking for a quote from you.”
I turn back to my computer monitor, dismissing him. “Give them a quote from me, then.”
“You want me to make it up?”
I look up only long enough to glare. “Did I stutter?”
A crooked grin tilts his lips. “This’ll be fun.”
His threat is empty. He’d never do anything to tarnish the name of North Industries. When I think of the things he’s done to protect our family business, the way he’s had to spin a story to keep me out of the tabloids and out of jail, my reputation is safe in his hands.
“Close the door on your way out.”
He chuckles and stands to leave. “Jordan’s a special lady for putting up with your ornery ass. Hold on to that one.”
I keep my eyes on the screen until he’s gone and then lift my gaze to the door after it’s closed. Holding on to Jordan would be the selfish thing to do. If I cared about her at all, I’d let her go to find someone better. And even as the words slip through my head, my vision goes red with thoughts of violence.