“And the night.”
I looked at her again. “You don’t have to work?”
Behind the happiness in her eyes was an even stronger emotion.
Worry.
Each shift she didn’t go into the bar meant a month that would be financially tighter, a concern that she wouldn’t make enough to cover everything she needed. She rarely spoke about it, but she didn’t have to—I could see the stress.
I kissed her knuckles before setting her hand in my lap. “Let’s grab some food later and cook it at your place, so Gran can enjoy it too.”
I felt her eyes on me.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go out or eat dinner in your bed instead?”
I turned off the highway and came to a stop in front of the light. “Do you know what we’re about to hit?”
“I’m hoping it’s not something with this beautiful car.”
Damn it, she’s so cute.
“Our six-month anniversary.”
She squeezed my fingers, her voice turning quiet as she replied, “I know.”
“I think I’ve shown you in that time how much Gran means to me.”
“You have.” She adjusted the collar of her jacket, so it wasn’t rubbing against her mouth. “I just … I don’t know.”
The directions were written down and tucked into my pocket for reference, but I remembered I needed to take a right at this light. I waited until it was clear and turned.
“Talk to me, Pearl.”
She took her time to respond, waiting until we stopped again. “Sometimes, you feel like a dream. Like this is all too good to be true.”
Since the light was red, I released her hand and cupped her cheek, my fingers sliding under her hat. My stare held hers steady. “Don’t you know I feel the same way?”
As she exhaled the air she’d been holding in, I gave her a kiss.
“I’ve never been this happy in my entire life,” I whispered against her mouth.
When I turned toward the windshield, she kissed the inside of my hand. “Me too.”
My foot returned to the gas, and I made a few more turns before entering what looked like an abandoned parking lot.
“You still have no idea where we are?” I pulled into a spot and shut off the car.
She searched the space around us—the trees that surrounded both sides of the large lot, the little view across that showed a few cozy neighborhoods. “Nope, I’m clueless.”
“Good.”
I nodded for her to get out and met her at the back of the car. When I lifted the trunk, she gazed at what was inside, her eyes then instantly meeting mine.
“You didn’t?”
I took out the two sleds that I’d packed in, holding them like surfboards against the ground. “I did, and this is supposed to be the best hill in the area.”
She jumped into my arms, legs circling my waist, hugging me. Each of her breaths hit my neck, the speed of them increasing with every second that passed. “I love you, Ashe.”
The sleds fell from my hand as I wrapped my arms around her, my eyelids closing at the sound of her words. I held her so tightly—a hand gripping the back of her head, the other holding her against my chest.
I waited until her eyes were on me again before I said, “I love you.”
I kissed her softly, so she could feel, not just hear, what was happening in my chest.
Our mouths stayed tangled, the coldness creating a thick white fog as we breathed each other out.
“And I love you for doing this for me,” she sighed, now a few inches separating us.
I swayed her in my arms as though music were playing, her smile growing with each dip. “I told you it was going to be a year of fun. Are you ready?”
She clenched the tops of my shoulders, but I barely felt the squeeze through my jacket. “Yes.”
I went to set her down, but she didn’t move.
I laughed at more of her cuteness coming through. “Are you sure? Because you’re going to have to let me go to make that happen.”
“That’s the problem, Ashe …” The emotion in her face was taking ahold of me, clenching as tightly as her fingers. “Every time I’m with you, it gets harder and harder to do that.”
Thirty-Seven
Before
Pearl
“Good morning,” Ashe said as he pulled me against his chest, my face falling somewhere around his neck.
I stretched my leg over his, my eyes blinking from the spring sunlight that came through his window, yawning from the little sleep we’d gotten.
I had known coming here after work was going to make me even more tired than usual, but I’d wanted to spend every second I could with him.
Even if that meant hardly any sleep.
I nuzzled into the crook of his muscles. “Morning.”
“I hope you don’t have any plans today.” I glanced up at his eyes, and his hand cupped my butt as he added, “Because I have no intention of letting you leave my bed.” His hardness pressed against me, the tone of his voice changing.
“Mmm,” I groaned, my hips meeting his. “I can give you a few hours, but then I have some errands to run to get everything ready for tonight.”
“What’s tonight?”
“Gran’s birthday.”
His hands were suddenly on my face. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
I shrugged. “I don’t do anything crazy to celebrate. I just make her favorite foods for dinner and banana pudding for dessert—she loves that for some reason—and I always swing by the used bookstore to grab her a couple of paperbacks.”
He held my chin. “No.”
“No?”
He rolled me onto my back, hovering over me. “I’m going to take you both out for dinner.” When I didn’t respond, he went on, “You’re an excellent cook—I’m not trying to take that away from you. This is just something I’d like to do … if you’ll let me.”
There was so much love in his eyes that I couldn’t breathe.
I couldn’t form any thoughts.
I couldn’t even answer him.
“I realize I wasn’t invited.” He laughed. “Maybe I’m imposing. If I am, just tell me—”
“Not at all.” I swallowed. “This is just one of those moments when it feels like a dream.”
He pressed his nose to mine, rubbing our tips back and forth, his fingers on my ribs. “You’re very much awake, and you haven’t given me an answer.”
When I’d met this man, the leaves had started to change colors and fall from their branches. With my hand in his, I’d watched the first snow fall. And now, clasped once again, spring was whistling from behind the window next to his bed. Each season, he had continued to surprise me. I wasn’t sure if that was something I’d ever get used to—how his thoughtfulness and caring nature were a constant theme in our relationship. I’d certainly never seen that in all the years I’d lived with Vanessa.
But men like him really did exist.
I had proof.
“I would love that more than anything.” I took a breath, the tightness in my chest another reminder of how real this was. “But I don’t want you to pay—”