Fuck! Elliot? But this gets a laugh. Ana squeezes my hand.
“This man can beat the shit out of me and did, frequently. And any of you who have ever kickboxed with him will know, don’t mess with him. He’s badass. He’s a solitary guy. When he was younger he’d rather have had his head stuck in a book than be out tearing up the town with the likes of me. You’ve all heard how he found school challenging, so I’ll gloss over that—but somehow, by some fluke, and not because he’s smart or anything, he managed to get some sort of education and even talked his way into Harvard.
“But it turned out Harvard wasn’t for him, either. He wanted to throw himself into the world of commerce and high finance. So, he did…he’s doing kinda okay with that.” Elliot shrugs, apparently unimpressed, and again the audience laughs.
“During this whole time, not once did he show any interest in the opposite sex. None. Well, I’ll leave you to deduce what we all thought.”
Oh, for fuck’s sake. I roll my eyes, and Elliot grins. “So, imagine our collective surprise and delight when not too long ago he shows up with this beautiful young woman, Anastasia Steele. It was obvious from the beginning that she’d captured his heart. And for some strange reason, maybe she was dropped on her head as a child”—he shrugs once more—“she fell for him.”
Again, with the laughter from our guests!
“Today they tied the knot, and I just want to say, Christian, Ana, congratulations. We are rooting for you. And no, she’s not pregnant!”
There’s a communal gasp around all the tables.
“To our bride and groom, Ana and Christian!” He raises his glass. I want to kill him, and judging by Ray Steele’s expression, so does he.
Ana’s cheeks are pink, and she looks a little shocked.
“Thanks, Elliot,” she says, laughing.
I throw my napkin at him and turn to Ana. “Shall we cut the cake?”
“Sure.”
The DJ is primed and ready as Ana and I make our way to the dance floor. I sweep her into my arms as everyone gathers around us, and Ana settles her arms around my neck. The sweet, soulful words of the song ring through the pavilion, and from the corner of my eye I see Carla clutch her throat in recognition. And then I’ve only got eyes for my wife as Corinne Bailey Rae starts to sing “Like a Star.”
Everyone else fades away. And it’s just the two of us gliding across the floor. “Like a star across my sky,” Ana whispers. She lifts her lips to mine and I’m lost…and found.
“Mom, thank you for not insisting on a Catholic wedding.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Christian. I couldn’t force it on you. I thought Michael did a wonderful service.”
“He did.” Leaning forward, I kiss my mother on her forehead. She closes her eyes, and when she opens them again they burn with a curious intensity. “You look so happy, darling. I’m so thrilled for both of you.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
I glance over to where Kate and Ana are in a deep conversation. Elliot is watching them. No. Elliot is watching Kate. He can’t take his eyes off her. Perhaps he cares for her more than he’s letting on.
The dance floor is full; Ray and Carla are taking a turn. They really do get on. I glance at my watch—it’s 5 p.m.—time we thought about leaving. I amble over toward my wife. Kate hugs her, hard, then grins at me, and I feel slightly less antagonistic toward her.
“Hi, baby.” I slip my arms around Ana and kiss her temple. “Kate,” I acknowledge her.
“Hello again, Christian. I’m off to find your best man, who happens to be my best man, too.” With a smile to us both, she heads over to Elliot, who is drinking with Ethan and José.
“Time to go,” I whisper.
I’m done with this party. I want to be alone with my wife.
“Already?” Ana says. “This is the first party I’ve been to where I don’t mind being the center of attention.” She turns in my arms and smiles up at me.
“You deserve to be. You look stunning, Anastasia.”
“So do you.”
“This beautiful dress becomes you.” I love how it reveals her enticing shoulders.
“This old thing?” She peers up at me, in that way that she does, all shy and bewitching through her lashes. She’s irresistible. Leaning down, I kiss her.
“Let’s go. I don’t want to share you with all these people anymore.”
“Can we leave our own wedding?”
“Baby, it’s our party, and we can do whatever we want. We’ve cut the cake. And right now, I’d like to whisk you away and have you all to myself.”
She giggles. “You have me for a lifetime, Mr. Grey.”
“I’m very glad to hear that, Mrs. Grey.”
“Oh, there you two are! Such lovebirds.”
Oh shit. Grandma Trevelyan strikes.
“Christian, darling—one more dance with your grandma?”
“Of course, Grandmother.” I swallow my sigh.
“And you, beautiful Anastasia, go and make an old man happy—dance with Theo.”
“Theo, Mrs. Trevelyan?”
“Grandpa Trevelyan. And I think you can call me Grandma. Now, you two seriously need to get working on my great-grandkids. I won’t last too much longer.” Her smile borders on the lecherous.
Grandma! Jesus!
“Come, Grandmother,” I say, hastily.
We have years before we have to think about kids.
I lead her slowly onto the dance floor, glancing apologetically back at Ana and rolling my eyes. “Laters, baby!”
Ana gives me a little wave.
“Oh, darling boy, you look so handsome in your suit. And your bride! Stunning. You’ll make beautiful children together.”
“One day, Grandmother. Are you enjoying the wedding?” I need to move her on to another subject.
“Your parents know how to throw a party. Of course, your mother gets that from me. Theo would rather be puttering around on the farm. But then you know that.”
“I do.” I have a stack of fond memories of helping Grandpa in his orchard. It’s one of my favorite places. “I’ll have to bring Ana to visit.”
“You must. You promise, now.”
“I promise.”
We shuffle around the dance floor to “Just the Way You Are,” a Bruno Mars track, which morphs into “Moves Like Jagger” by Maroon 5. My grandmother is loving it. I think she may have consumed a little too much Bollinger. But when the first few bars of “Sex on Fire” blast over the speakers, I decide it’s time to deliver Grandma back to her table.