She leaned back and looked up at him. “Absolutely. Now let me go make up the bed in the other room for me,” she said. “Then we’ll see what we can make up for you here.”
He stepped back, and she quickly carried the bedding and her nightie into her spare room.
She could use the second bathroom just fine, even though she preferred her own en suite, but it wasn’t like this would be a forever scenario. And, if it made life easier and made him feel better, then fine, although she really didn’t want to see him hurt. Now that she knew he was missing a leg, it was that much worse. And she knew immediately that he would hate that she thought that way.
She groaned, hoping it was low enough, but he heard it.
He turned, looked at her, and said, “What?”
She decided that honesty was the best answer, and she said, “I was thinking it wasn’t fair because you’re already injured with a prosthetic, and you shouldn’t be doing this, and then I realized how angry you would be if you thought I was thinking that way.”
“And I will be,” he said, “if you continue to think that way.” He studied her intently. “I am no less the warrior than I was,” he said, “and I damn well will not tolerate anybody thinking that.”
His voice had that clipped edge that told her how very desperately unhappy he was to hear her voice that. “But I still needed to say it,” she said gently. “Anything else would have been a lie.”
At that, he burst out laughing. “And I remember that too,” he said. “You could send me from fury to laughter in a heartbeat.”
“I never quite understood why you were so volatile,” she said in a musing voice, “but you were. You’d be up, and then you’d be down.”
“And that was all you,” he said. “You’d send me into this fury, by saying something completely insulting, and then it would be so obvious that you hadn’t meant it as an insult in any way, and I’d break up laughing.” He shook his head. “I don’t know if it was the naiveté or if we were just so very different, but it seemed like everything about you was so fresh and young and different.”
“That would have worn off quickly,” she said with a smile.
“Maybe,” he said, “but it sure hasn’t worn off over all these years.”
She looked up at him, shadows in her eyes, and she said, “And what if it’s not for real?”
“Well,” he said, “I guess we have to take the walk together and see. Because otherwise anything less will seem like I missed out on something very major all over again,” he said, “and I couldn’t live with that.”
She smiled and felt tears in the back of her eyes. “You used to say the damnedest things,” she said, “and this is just the same thing all over again.”
“But I meant them then, and I mean them now,” he said. “You were always very precious to me. I don’t know why I needed to get out of town, but obviously I understood more than I thought I would about just how bad and how much I needed to grow up and how I couldn’t do that here.”
“And it never occurred to me,” she said, “how long the memories of the people here were.” She added, “If I thought moving my job and my son was an easy thing, I’d consider moving, just so you could have a fresh start somewhere else.”
“It’s okay,” he said, “because I’ve been through enough places and done enough good works in the world that I can stand tall and proud. I know I made a lot of mistakes back then, but,” he added, “they weren’t all fatal, and I recovered from most of them.”
“And the detective?”
“Screw him,” he said with a casual air. “If I worried about every asshole out there in the world, I’d do nothing but fight, and I gave that up a long time ago.”
She smiled. “Once again you have all the answers,” she said, shaking her head. “And that was something I couldn’t believe either. While I dillydallied and didn’t know what to do and how to do it, you’d already made decisions and were ahead of me in no time.”
“I was never hampered by a lack of decision-making,” he said. “I was hampered by jumping in too quick and not thinking things through. You used to think things through, and, when you were done, you would come back with a decision. By then I was already ten steps down the path, but it didn’t mean they were the right ten steps or that they were even on the right path,” he said with a sideways grin.
She walked into the guest bathroom and then looked down at her watch. “Oh my,” she said. “And here I was ready to brush my teeth, so I could turn around and go to bed, but it’s still early yet.”
“It doesn’t feel very early,” he admitted. He checked his watch. “It’s nine-thirty. When do you normally go to bed?”
She shrugged. “About ten-thirty normally.”
“And now?”
“I’m tired,” she said. “I wouldn’t mind going to bed soon, but it doesn’t have be right now.”
“I’ll do a walk around the property anyway,” he said. “So go ahead and get ready for bed, and I’ll take Sabine for another visit outside, and, when we come back in, it’s probably better if we just go to sleep.”
“Is that because you’re not expecting to get much sleep?” she asked shrewdly. “Or some other reason?”
“Lots of reasons,” he said, “but your guess is as good as any. I just don’t want to end up in a situation where we’re both exhausted tomorrow when dealing with Jeremy.”
“Ouch,” she said, thinking about her son and Kurt. “I’m really hoping that goes well.”
“Maybe,” he said. “I’m obviously hoping it will too, but I also know that just because it might go well tomorrow doesn’t mean there isn’t work to be done.”
“I know,” she said sadly. “You’re right.”
As she watched, he got up, called Sabine to him, and the two walked back downstairs. She didn’t know how long he would be gone, but she took advantage and quickly went through her nightly ritual and then realized she wanted a shower anyway. She hopped in, had a quick shower, and, by the time she came out, she heard them downstairs, rummaging in the kitchen. She wondered if they were looking for more food. Anything was possible. She dressed, and, with her wet towel hung up on the hook on the side, she stepped out and called down to him and said, “I’m out of the shower, if you want one.”
“That’s a good idea,” he said, coming upstairs. “I’ve locked up downstairs, and I didn’t see anything outside.”
She smiled with relief. “You know what? My stranger could have had nothing to do with us,” she said. “It could have been a complete accident. Maybe he was looking for a completely different house.”
“Maybe,” he said.
She smiled, reached up, kissed him gently on the cheek, and said, “Have a good night.” And she walked into the spare room and closed the door.
He deserved a medal for this, dammit. Kurt stared at the door to the room that he so badly wanted to join her in and then turned and forcibly walked toward the master. He didn’t want to chase her out of her usual bedroom, but, given the circumstances, this was the most sensible way to do things. And he wasn’t planning on sleeping in her bed because he knew he’d never sleep. The memories would crush him. After he’d washed up, he pulled a set of blankets from the closet and stretched them out on the floor and laid down. Sabine came over, and he had laid down a blanket just for her and patted it. She immediately curled up at his side and cuddled in close. He wrapped his arm around her and whispered, “Just for tonight, girl.” She whimpered a little bit, and he gently stroked her until she fell asleep.