I smoothed my hands up and down my thighs, trying to calm down, trying to look like I wasn’t about to jump out of my own skin. “I’m in love with you, Jameson.” I swallowed down the bile that rose up in my throat, my uncertainty of the situation so consuming that if I wasn’t sitting down I surely would have fainted.
“I’ve been in love with you for so long, but too afraid to speak the words aloud, too terrified that things would be ruined between us.” I looked down at my feet, ones that were covered in plain white cotton socks that didn’t keep out the chill in the air whatsoever. “You’re all I have, Jameson. You’re my family, my best friend... my everything.” I looked at him then and his eyes were red-rimmed, his jaw tight. I didn’t know what emotions were playing across his expression. I couldn’t read him at that moment.
His big body shook as if he couldn’t control the action. “You’re all I have too, Lia.” He looked like he was going to cry, but after a moment of silence, as if he were trying to gather himself, he looked back down at Caleb. “You’re my everything.” His words were low, loving. “Both of you are now my everything.”
I had my hand placed right over my heart, not realizing I’d done the act until after the fact.
“I am so in love with you.” He looked back at me and I felt the stupidest smile cover my face. “For longer than I want to admit.” He laughed softly. “And yeah, I was afraid of everything I’d lose if I admitted it and you weren’t on the same page as me.” He shook his head slowly. “I should have been a man and told you, not wasting time, not wasting what we could have had, no matter what could have happened.” He looked at Caleb and I swore it seemed like Jameson was going to cry. “And you gave me this, him, a baby, Lia.” He coughed as if he was choked up. I quickly wiped my falling tears of happiness away. “You made me a father.” He lifted Caleb up and kissed his little head, closing his eyes as he did the act.
I made a sound deep in my throat, one of happiness and relief and everything that I’d ever hoped and dreamed happening for our reunion.
“I recorded everything that happened while you were away, during the pregnancy. I have pictures and videos, journal entries, too.” He snapped his head up to me, surprise on his face. I shrugged. “I figured you might want to see all that, but if not—”
“Come here,” he murmured to me softly, and I shifted closer to him so we were thigh to thigh, Jameson’s big body pressed to my much smaller one. “Thank you. I want to see it all. I want to feel like I didn’t miss out on a single moment.” He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pulled me against him even more. “My little family,” he said in this deliriously happy voice, a smile spreading over his face. “All mine.”
I closed my eyes and rested my head against his bicep, never realizing how much I’d wanted this to be my reality until I was experiencing it. I’d only ever dreamed of it. I’d only ever wondered what this would be like.
But here I was. Here we were. Making our very own future.
Epilogue One
One year later
Jameson
I sighed in contentment as I pulled Lia in closer--impossibly closer if I was being honest. She was already pressed right to me, but fuck, I wanted her closer. I closed my eyes and buried my face in her hair, inhaling deeply, the scent of the rose shampoo she always used causing fire to stir within me. I’d just made love to her good and hard, long and slow, yet I was ready to go again.
The baby monitor on the bedside table showed little Caleb was still fast asleep, and although we’d hoped he’d be sleeping through the night by now, there were times--stretches even--that he didn’t. But no matter how tired I was, I wouldn’t change this for anything.
I smoothed my hand over her arm, grabbed her wrist gently, and lifted her hand up and out of the blankets so I could look at the wedding ring she wore. I’d asked her to marry me as soon as I’d gotten back home, and knew that's what I wanted to do even before I knew about baby Caleb.
I’d just wanted Lia in my life, and I would have done anything to make that a reality.
The last year had gone by in a blur of tears and laughs, smiles and stress. And yeah, it was fucking hard being a parent and a husband, and making sure I didn’t screw things up. I worked a lot because of my medical background, and Lia talked about going back to school, which made the stress on her even greater. And at the base of my core I just wanted to make things okay for her. I wanted things to be easy for us, always happy, and where we weren’t wanting to pull our hair out because Caleb got into the flour and decided to use it in the kitchen like we needed a remodel.
But once again… I wouldn’t change it all for the world.
We only had this one moment in time, this slice of life that would never happen again.
I’d never see my son at this exact same age. I’d never hold my wife in this way ever again. And I never wanted to take it for granted.
“If I could marry you all over again, I would, Lia,” I found myself saying before I even knew the words were out in the open. She slept soundly, not even me lifting her arm waking her. And I couldn’t deny I liked the fact she felt so utterly safe and protected in my arms, that she could be this deep in sleep.
I wrapped my arm around her again and buried my nose in her hair, inhaling once more.
“I love you more each and every day,” I whispered into the strands. “Thank you for being my best friend, for being my wife, and for giving me Caleb. Thank you for making me a husband and a father.” My arm tightened around her reflexively. “It’s always been you.” I leaned down to kiss the soft skin on her shoulder. “And there will never be anyone else for me for as long as I live.” Truer words had never been spoken in the history of mankind.
Epilogue Two
Ten Years Later
Jameson
This never got old…never got any less incredible.
Not to me. Not ever.
I sat in what I knew was one hell of an uncomfortable hospital chair, but I was so deliriously happy that I could have had my ass on barbed wire and I wouldn’t have felt anything but joy.
The little bundle cradled in one of my arms was so tiny, so light, it was almost like I held nothing at all. I stared down at my son, Abel, who had a head full of dark hair like Lia, and who, when I’d seen his eyes open, had looked at blue as mine, just like his older brother’s. I loved him so much already. A tiny shift in my other arm had me looking at our daughter, Cellie, who, just like her older twin brother, had a head of dark hair, but eyes that looked like they’d be Lia’s shade.
She already had me wrapped around her little finger.
The twins had been a surprise, the pregnancy not planned, but they were the best kind of shock, the kind that made you feel whole in every single way.
God, I didn’t think my heart could have gotten fuller after finally making Lia mine and starting a family with her with Caleb, but here we were, all these years later and everything feeling like it was absolutely the way it should be.