Jill blew out a breath and tipped her head up to look at the ceiling.
Zeke just watched her for a long moment. His gut was tight but he wasn’t going to apologize for his family or for his plan to lean on them. He’d be there for any of them in this same situation and he knew they knew that. “I understand that you didn’t choose this. This was an accident. But we’ll make it work. You can be as involved…or not…as you want.”
Jill focused on him again. “Isn’t that the line the woman generally gives the guy? Tells him he can be as involved as he wants?”
“It’s our kid. Just because you’re the mother doesn’t mean that you automatically have to be the one taking the reins, does it?”
“But it makes me look like a bad person, right? Lots of people will judge me for not being more involved.”
“Maybe. Probably,” he admitted. “But not everyone’s wired the same way and it’s not like you planned this and changed your mind. We did what we could to prevent it. We used condoms every time, but they’re not a hundred percent. So—” He shrugged. “Here we are. We’ll make the best of it.”
“I still think it feels a little pathetic for us to just mess up like this and then just assume that your family will help us clean it up.”
“That’s what families do.”
“There are other options, Zeke.”
Right. Of course there were. And he needed to listen to all of that. “And if you want to talk about those, I will. But if I get a vote, I think I can be a good dad. I mean, I didn’t used to know how to build a damn thing, but my family taught me and now I’m one of the best. My family’s full of amazing fathers. If I was going to learn how to be a great dad and a good man, right here in Autre with the Landrys is exactly where I’d come to make that happen. Except, lucky me, I’m already here.”
She seemed to be thinking all that over for a few seconds, but she also seemed touched.
“Do you think I’m a bad person? For not being more maternal or nurturing?”
He crossed the few feet that separated them to stand right in front of her.
This woman was carrying his baby. That was starting to sink in. Was she who he had imagined himself with? No. But she wasn’t like any woman he’d met before, so how could he have possibly imagined that?
But she was good for him.
“You have made me into more of a caregiver than I have ever been,” he told her. “My whole life I’ve been the one everyone else takes care of, because I’m the youngest and…” He gave her a little grin. “Because I really like it.”
She gave a soft snort.
“But you haven’t nurtured me. From the moment we met you haven’t worried about me or made things easier for me or placated me. You’re the first woman I’ve ever slept with who hasn’t cooked me a single thing.”
She grimaced.
“But,” he went on. “You’ve not only made me happier than I’ve been with anyone else, you’ve made me into a caregiver. There isn’t a single person in the Landry family who actually needs me. I love them, I make them laugh, I help them out, but none of them need me.” He lifted a hand and cupped her face. “I love feeding you. Even if it’s peanut butter and cereal, I like shopping for it. Even if I’m not the chef, I like making sure there’s food here for you. And I know you think my mom’s been doing the laundry, but it’s been me.”
She lifted a brow.
“Okay, she did it twice.”
Jill tipped her head.
“Okay, maybe four times. But the rest of the time, I did it.” He grinned at her.
“What about the cleaning?” she asked.
Yeah, he knew that was a trick. She knew he hadn’t cleaned the house. But the house had gotten cleaned. “That wasn’t my family.”
“No. Mrs. Thibodaux said she does it twice a month for you in exchange for you not charging her labor for putting on her new roof.”
“That’s true.”
After a beat, Jill smiled. “She does a great job.”
“She does. And I’ll be honest, I’m really hoping she wants new kitchen cabinets put in or a bathroom remodel once that roof is worked off.”
Jill laughed.
“Look,” he went on. “I like taking care of you. And yeah, I don’t take care of every detail myself, but it gets done and you don’t have to do it. And I’m lucky you’re pretty easy to take care of. But, I’m also okay with taking on something a little harder. Like a baby.”
Jill’s expression softened and damned if her eyes didn’t get a little shiny.
But he meant it.
Even if Jill only needed him for the next nine months and then to take care of their child so that she could focus on saving the world—or at least the Galápagos penguins of the world—then he could do that. He was the one person who could step up for her right now.
That gave him a surge of satisfaction, excitement, and a sense of purpose.
He wanted this. He was sure of it.
“And I definitely do not think you’re a bad person, Jill. You have known who you are and what you want since you were eight years old. That’s amazing. You’ve done everything you could to make that happen. You’ve made a difference in this world and you’re going to keep doing that.” He ran the pad of his thumb over her cheek. “Honestly? I’m pretty happy this happened because this means I have a reason to stay really close to you and watch all the amazing things you are going to do. I’m thrilled that my son or daughter is going to have a front row seat to see the way you are going to make the world a better place.”
He was startled to see her eyes actually fill with tears. His thumb brushed away the first one that escaped her lower lashes.
Her hands came up to circle his wrists and she gave a little sniff.
“That was the perfect thing to say.”
“Thank God. Because I was really winging that.”
She gave a soft laugh. “That’s how we both do most things, isn’t it?”
“Yep. And most of the time it works out really well.”
“Except the times when the condoms don’t work.”
He shook his head. “I’m thinking that maybe that was one of the best times.”
She blew out a little breath. “You are unlike any guy I’ve ever met.”
“Glad to hear it.”
They just stood looking at each other for several beats.
Then she said, “You’re really hot in these glasses.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“And I’m thinking… I mean, you can’t get me pregnant again.”
Her meaning hit him and he felt a slow grin curl his lips. “That is a very good point.”
“And, if I stay here, there’s no chance of running into Chuck out in the yard.”
Without another word, Zeke scooped her up in his arms and headed upstairs to his bedroom.
Two weeks later Jill met Zeke on her front porch when he came to pick her up to take her to Ellie’s. They had taken time to let everything really sink in and talk through what they both wanted. Now they were on their way to the bar to tell the family the news.