“Sorry it took me so long to remember I could do that,” he told her. “You shouldn’t have had to suffer that first one.”
“You don’t have to do that,” she told him, switching to the mate bond. “I don’t like the idea of you suffering, either.”
“You just worry about doing what the girls tell you to, and I’ll worry about helping you get through this with as little pain as possible. I love you, Bethy. I’m scared, too, but I know our little girl is going to be fine. I feel it in my gut.”
Bethany couldn’t help the tears that appeared. Drake had told her once that he never wanted her to experience any pain ever again because she’d been through enough to last several lifetimes. Though she knew he was excited about their child, he’d been dreading the labor since they realized she was pregnant.
“Bethany, you’re doing amazing.” Jen leaned forward and pressed a cool washcloth to her collarbone, which caused Bethany to sigh in relief. “You’re beautiful and calm, and you’re not even swearing at the man who is to blame for what is about to happen to your vagina. I really feel like someone should curse him a blue streak right now.”
“Where’s Thia when we need her?” Bethany heard Zara quip.
“The last thing we need is that mini-hellion witnessing childbirth,” Peri said dryly. “She’d get it in her head that all females were supposed to be pushing out babies and probably try to shove dolls between our legs in an effort to recreate this whole miraculous event.”
That made Bethany laugh, because it sounded exactly like something the mischievous, wild child would do.
“Okay, your contractions are two minutes apart.” Rachel spoke and everyone got quiet. “The heartbeat is strong. Sally is working her magic, making sure the baby is healthy. It looks like all of her organs are doing what they’re supposed to be doing. You’re doing great, Momma.”
“You’re dilating rapidly.” Jacque looked up at Bethany.
“In woman speak, that means your who-ha looks like a black hole, only stuff isn’t going to be sucked in. It’s going to be shot out.” Jen patted Bethany’s knee.
“Thank you, Jen, for clarifying that her vagina isn’t about to become a giant vacuum.” Crina sounded like she was trying hard not to laugh.
“Drake, you do realize this is the perfect opportunity to use that sentence as the most awesome innuendo in the history of innuendos, right?” Jen asked.
“She’s not wrong,” Bethany said. She noticed her voice even sounded winded through their bond. “It would be an awesome innuendo.”
“Our child is not going to be allowed around that woman,” Drake growled, but she heard the humor behind his annoyance.
“She always means well,” Bethany said, unable to focus enough to keep speaking through their bond.
“Bethy, she got you a penis cake for your baby shower. How can she mean well?” Drake said out loud.
“It was her way of including you in the celebration,” Bethany pointed out. “After all, it was your penis that got us into this situation.”
“By the way…” Jen jumped into their conversation. “Thanks for the picture. I was able to give it to the baker. I think the likeness was remarkable.”
Bethany felt Drake’s anger rising, and a little of the pain he’d been siphoning slipped back through the bond. She grunted, and immediately her mate refocused and pushed the pain away. “You gave her a picture of my junk?” he whispered.
“Do you really think I’d let another female see your male bits?” Bethany asked.
Drake nuzzled her neck and said, “The only reason I would believe it is because they got the size right.”
Bethany laughed and then groaned when she suddenly got a powerful tightening in her nether regions. “I need to push.”
“Said every male ever behind their female.” Jen made a motion like a drum being tapped after a good joke.
Bethany snorted. Apparently, allowing her mate to absorb the pain made labor a hell of a lot less laborish and her friends a little funnier.
“Sally, we good?” Jacque asked. That question wiped the smile right off Bethany’s face, reminding her that their child wasn’t full term. Thank the Great Luna they had two gypsy healers with her to give their girl what she needed.
“One sec,” Sally said, drawing the words out. “Aaand, yes.”
“It’s go time, baby.” Jen rubbed her hands together. Bethany glanced between Jacque and the blonde.
“She’s not going to catch my child, right?” Bethany asked, even as her face scrunched up from trying to keep from pushing.
Jacque’s smile was comforting. “Jen will not hold your daughter until Drake says she can.”
Jen folded her arms across her chest. “Great. That will be never. He still hasn’t forgiven me for teaching his mate how to get knocked up in the first place. You really owe me a thank-you card.”
“I don’t mind if she holds her, but maybe just not when she’s about to shoot out of the non-vacuous black hole,” Bethany said and then followed with, “I have to push!”
“You’ve got a contraction starting,” Rachel said. “Push now.”
Bethany squeezed Drake’s hand, and Crina’s, who’d taken up a spot next to Bethany’s head. Bethany hadn’t cared who it was. She just needed something else to squeeze.
“You’re doing great!” Jen sounded so excited, as if she were the one having the baby. “There’s her little head. Oh, wow, that is tiny. Your black hole just got downsized. I don’t know to what but it’s definitely not nearly as cavernous.”
Bethany panted as the contraction passed. She still needed to push. The heaviness in her pelvis and against her back was uncomfortable. She imagined it was supposed to be more painful, but she could feel Drake taking the pain into his body.
“I just realized something.” Jen tapped her chin as Bethany panted like a racehorse.
“We’re all dying to know what that might be. There isn’t a baby being born or anything important like that,” Peri replied.
“We should have done a birthing pool,” Jen continued.
“Time to push again.” Rachel patted Bethany’s stomach. The healer’s eyes were still closed, and her hands continued to glow.
“I’m just saying,” Jen went on while Bethany pushed again. “If there was a birthing pool, then Titus’s future baby momma could just slide right out into the pool. It would be like her first time on a water park ride.”
“Did she”—Bethany panted as she pushed and tried to talk—“just compare,” more panting—“my girl parts to a water slide?” Bethany groaned and sagged back against Drake. She felt his chest moving, and her upper body shook involuntarily.
“Are you laughing?” she asked, still working on catching her breath.
She felt him press his forehead to the back of her head, and his breath huffed out into her hair. “She’s not wrong. It would be a very wet and a wild ride.”
“BOOM!” Jen yelled. “I knew deep down, like way, way deep down in the depths of your bowels, where no one could ever see, you had a sense of humor. You can’t hate me anymore. You just agreed with me about your mate’s water park slide, while she’s in labor no less.”