“That’s my cousin Morgan. His mom, Aunt Fran, and my grandpa are brother and sister. His wife’s name is Race, and he works with my dad at ALFA.”
“And Fran is married to Dog?”
I shake my head. “She’s married to Bear.”
“Ahh. Right. Bear,” she repeats.
“Bear is one of my uncle Joe’s oldest friends.”
She looks at me funny. “So, his good friend married his aunt?”
I grimace. “When you put it that way, it sounds gross.”
“I’m just getting the logistics down. I’m not making any judgments.”
“That’s like me marrying one of my aunt’s friends, which is just weird.”
Arlo pats my hand. “Don’t think about it.”
“I’m trying not to,” I mutter with a shiver.
“And him?” she asks, changing the subject.
“Bear’s son, Ret.”
“And the two women at his side?”
“One is his wife, and the other is their…”
“Got it,” she says quickly, not letting me finish. “I can figure that one out.”
“Alese and Nya are their names. They’ve been together as long as I’ve been alive.”
“It looks like it works for them.”
“They have two sons a little younger than me. Both are in the military somewhere in the world, but their location is secret. Ret is former military, and the boys took after him.”
“Interesting,” she whispers. “He looks former military.”
“He works at ALFA with my dad too.”
“So, you weren’t kidding about everyone either working at ALFA or Inked, were you?”
“Told ya, babe. Tamara and Mammoth have their own business, but you’ve been there. And Lily’s mom owns a clinic, but other than that…pretty much.”
“That’s amazing. Your family is really interesting.”
“I guess they are,” I tell her.
“Hey,” Lily says, locking her arm with Arlo’s before we have a chance to take a step. “The girls want you to come outside and hang out.”
Arlo looks at me. “You mind?”
“No, sugar. You go with Lily. I’ll deal with my mom.”
“I should stay with you,” she replies.
I shake my head. “Go, babe. Hang out with the ladies. I’m sure they want all the juicy details. It’s like gossip central out there.”
“Shut up,” Lily snaps. “We don’t gossip. We share the truth and talk about the guys and their shit-tastic behavior. Anyway, she was mine first.”
“Technically, she wasn’t,” I tease, but before I can say anything more, Lily pulls Arlo outside, closing the door behind them and heading right toward the table with Gigi, Tamara, Rebel, and Jo.
“Man, your ears are going to be on fire, brother,” Trace says, coming to stand next to me and staring out the sliding glass door. “How you got such a fine piece of ass…I’ll never know.”
“She’s not a piece of ass. Watch your mouth.”
“Touchy fucker, aren’t you?”
I turn my head, glaring at my younger, cockier brother. “Just keep her name off your tongue.”
He smiles. “I like this caveman side of you. It’s kind of full of anger just below the surface, which is a nice change.”
“Anger is never a good look,” I tell him.
He smirks. “Nah. It suits you along with the territorial alpha trait from Dad you’re letting loose.”
I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Why are you busting my balls, Trace?”
“Because I can,” he says and then walks away.
“Don’t listen to that little shit,” Aunt Fran says, coming to stand at my side, clearly eavesdropping. “He’s jealous, baby. It looks like you may have finally gotten your head out of your ass and found yourself a good girl.” She hooks her arm through mine, putting her head against my bicep. “Now, don’t fuck it up.”
I peer down at her salt-and-pepper hair. “And how do I make sure I don’t do that, Auntie?”
“Always make her feel like the most important thing in the world and never take whatever piece of herself she gives you for granted. Even the strongest person wants someone in their corner, having their back, and showering them with love. She’s no different. A good woman is worth the extra effort and sometimes requires more attention and understanding. I know you two are new to each other, but don’t use that as an excuse to be lazy.”
“Got it, Auntie. Thanks.”
“And when all else fails, use what the good Lord gave you to dickmatize her.” I give her a pained look.
“Dickmatize,” she repeats with a quick nod. “Bear dickmatized me, and I didn’t even really like him then.”
“Woman, you’re lying. You always liked me,” he says from a few feet away, also eavesdropping. “But I did give you the good dick, so I won’t disagree with the dickmatizing.”
My stomach rolls because I don’t want to talk about sex or dicks with Aunt Fran and Uncle Bear. “Thanks for the great advice,” I tell her and him, although he hasn’t added much to the conversation.
“The way to a woman’s heart isn’t just by listening to them talk and giving them attention. You got to give them the good dick and lots of orgasms. It’s amazing how many assholes can’t find a clit to save their own life. Orgasms make you memorable.”
I look around, hoping someone’s nearby to save me from this awkward and uncomfortable conversation with my aunt and uncle, but there’s no one. “I’ll remember this conversation for the rest of my life,” I grumble.
Bear laughs. “Just keeping shit real.”
“And awkward,” I whisper.
Aunt Fran laughs, patting my stomach. “You’ve had it easy far too long, Carmello. The real test of a man is when he has it hard, and we’re about to see what you’re really made of, baby. Fight the good fight.”
“Have you two dipped into the wine early today?” I ask her.
She tips her head back and laughs. “I won’t lie. I’ve had two glasses, but you know I never have a filter even when I’m one hundred percent sober.”
“I like your mouth most of all, baby,” Bear tells her.
I somehow hold in the vomit that’s about to crawl up my throat. There’s a difference when it comes to talking about sex with my cousins and the elders of the family. I know they’ve had sex or else none of us would be here, but it’s not something I really let myself soak in or put much thought into because it’s just too much. “I think Arlo needs me outside.”
“Sure, baby,” Aunt Fran says, finally moving toward her husband. “You go get that girl, and don’t let her go without a fight. Dickmatize her.”
“Dickmatize. Got it,” I say, walking toward the sliding glass doors, thankful that conversation is over.
I’ve dickmatized more than a few women over the years. None of them I wanted, but they got a taste and wanted more. But how am I going to dickmatize Arlo without having sex?
Orgasms. Lots of orgasms.