Ugh. They’re the worst. But I really want to make sure everything’s okay with the lovebug, so I give her the green light.
“Okey dokey.”
I hold my breath when she lubricates the wand and sticks it up my hoo-ha.
“Now, it’s still very early, so you won’t see much,” she warns me as she moves the wand around. “It’s no more than a sac at this point.” She makes a small humming sound in her throat. “Hmmm.”
I look at the image on the screen. Hmm is right.
“That’s one big sac.”
“Yeah,” she agrees. “You’re definitely further along than five weeks. I’d say almost double that.” She looks at me. “Are you sure you had your period and it wasn’t just some light spotting?”
“Positive,” I tell her. “It wasn’t heavy, but I used a tampon the first day.”
Although now that I think about it…it did end a lot earlier than usual.
“Hmm,” she says again.
Another thought occurs to me and I quickly add up the dates.
Preston and I first had sex while we were in Hawaii, so maybe it happened there.
“I had unprotected sex with my husband sixty-six days ago while on our honeymoon.” Then I remember. “But I took Plan B, so I don’t know how I could end up pregnant after that.”
“Okay.” She pulls the wand out. “Let’s chat.”
Standing, she walks over to the sink and washes her hands. “Do you remember your last period before your honeymoon?”
I sit up. “It was about two weeks before. Why?”
A wrinkle forms between her brows. “How soon did you take the plan B after you had unprotected sex?”
I chew the corner of my lip as I think about this. “Three days after. But my best friend assured me it would stop anything from happening before it started.”
Freaking Breslin. Turns out she’s not always right.
“I see.” She takes a deep breath. “While that’s exactly what emergency contraception does, it’s more effective the sooner you take it. However, it seems that you were already ovulating during your honeymoon when you had unprotected sex. In this case, the morning-after pill wouldn’t work because an egg had already been released…and then fertilized within those three days. Essentially, you were already pregnant by the time you took it.”
My mouth drops open, and then a rush of panic fills me. “Did I harm the baby by doing that?”
She gives me a reassuring smile. “No. To my knowledge, there are no studies indicating it will harm the fetus.”
That’s reassuring, but I’m still a little baffled by all this. “What about me getting my period? How the heck did that happen?”
It’s common knowledge you don’t get those when you’re knocked up.
“What many women think is their period is actually something called decidual bleeding. It usually occurs within the first three months and happens when a woman would have had her period had she not conceived. It’s usually harmless, but we’ll keep a close eye on you, okay?”
I don’t like the term usually harmless, but I’m going to try to think positively. “So how far along am I?”
She picks up a calendar. “About nine weeks.”
I can’t believe this little lovebug has been inside me for over two months and I had no idea.
“Is there anything I can do to make sure everything goes smoothly from here on out?”
She picks up a tablet on the table. “Yes. I’m sending a script for prenatal vitamins to your local pharmacy. Start taking them as soon as possible. Also, avoid deli meats, raw fish, saunas, and hot tubs. And make sure you get plenty of water and rest. Your body will be going through a lot of changes during the next seven months so the healthier you are, the healthier the baby will be.” She looks up. “Do you have any other questions?”
I have tons, but the most important one is taking center stage.
I lie back down. “Can I see the lovebug again?”
Rolling over in bed, I drape my arm around Lola. He’s no Preston—and he’s a way sloppier kisser—but he’s been keeping me company as the new man of the house.
“Are you excited about having a brother or sister?”
He licks my face, and I laugh. I’m about to go downstairs and grab a snack, but there’s a loud bang on the front door.
Growling, Lola crouches on the bed, ready to attack.
I glance at the clock on the nightstand. It’s just after three a.m.
After putting my robe on, I head down the stairs. Lola follows close behind, keeping guard.
I debate checking the security cameras to see who it is before I open the door…but I don’t need to.
“I forgot my keys,” a very drunk sounding Preston slurs. “Let me in.”
My heart pounds like a jackhammer—desperate to see him—but I force myself to remain strong.
Because it’s not just me that I have to look out for.
“Where have you been? And don’t you dare lie to me.”
Because my intuition already knows.
He’s silent for so long I wonder if he left.
But then he speaks.
“At the casino.”
The confirmation is a sharp kick to the ribcage. In my gut I knew that’s most likely where he was…I just hoped it wasn’t true.
“You’ve been at the casino for four days?” I yell, all the hurt I feel coming out in a lash of anger.
Four days he’s been gambling…while I’ve been crying myself to sleep.
Four days he’s been gambling…while I was left dealing with the pain of his last words.
Four days he’s been gambling…while both me and our baby were left feeling unwanted.
“Yes,” he slurs. “Open up. I want to talk to you.”
Last time he talked, it hurt like hell.
I slap the door. “Fuck you.”
I’m so angry, so wounded I feel it everywhere.
“Dammit, come on,” he screams before his voice drops. “I’m sorry.”
He wasn’t sorry when he accused me of popping holes in the condoms.
He wasn’t sorry when he shouted in my face that he didn’t want our baby.
He wasn’t sorry when he went out on a bender.
“I was scared.” A painful sound escapes him. “Becca…she fucked me up.”
That might be true, but he made it crystal clear that while she’s good enough to be the mother of the child he wants…I’m not.
Hateful tears prick behind my eyes. “You should go back to her.”
Because it’s obvious he wants no part of this family.
He slams the door so hard it rattles. “I don’t want her. I never fucking wanted her. You know that.” His voice drops to a broken rasp. “I want you.” I hear his deep inhale. “If you want to keep it, I’ll deal with it, okay?”
My bottom lip quivers as the tears I was trying not to shed run down my face like rain.
Because while I can accept almost anything…my baby deserves better.
And it’s up to me to protect them.
“There is no baby.”
He didn’t want it, so now he doesn’t have it. Problem solved.