She stiffened away, scrambling from his lap and, nearly falling, managed to toss herself into the seat across from him. Her dress was still undone and she held it up against her chest. “No man is taking advantage of me.” She swallowed down a lump of pain. “Not ever again.”
He looked across the carriage at her, quiet for a moment before he slowly raised his hand, extending it out to her. “Come here. Ye’ll freeze over there.”
“I shouldn’t.” But her body ached to fit against his again. What a traitor it was. Even now, she wanted to feel his touch, the hard press of him. Why? Likely because she was a harlot. Why else did she continue to be attracted to men who didn’t want to commit to her even after she’d allowed them liberties?
But he lifted from his seat and reaching for her hand, pulled her across the carriage and settled her back into his lap. Her breath shortened as she looked up at his handsome features, so rugged and yet somehow, comforting. Rather than kiss her, however, he began to rebutton the back of her dress. “I think ye’re right. It’s time we talked.”
Her mouth pressed together. She should jump on this opportunity. Instead, she wanted to burrow against him like a child. Why had her strength abandoned her? “All right.”
“Diana, what did ye mean when you said ye won’t let a man take advantage of ye ever again? Which man took advantage the first time?”
She sucked in her breath. Had she really said that? “I only meant you.”
He wrapped his arms about her back, hugging her to his chest. “Ye did not.”
She looked at the window, not that she could see out. The curtains were firmly drawn. “I had a suitor last year. I thought we’d marry. We didn’t.”
His arms tightened. “And what liberties did ye allow him?”
She shook her head, still not meeting his eyes. She shouldn’t tell him. Diana hadn’t even shared the truth with her sisters. But somehow, wrapped in his embrace, she’d never wanted to tell someone more. Share the secret she’d been holding inside. “I allowed him all the liberties a woman can give.”
Chapter Five
Exile closed his mouth to keep the string of curses from falling out. Rage beat at his chest. He didn’t know who the man was, but he was going to kill him slowly.
Granted, Exile had also taken liberties. He knew that. But he had a genuine affection for Diana. A little voice in his head argued that the end result was the same. Only not entirely because he and Diana had stopped well before all the liberties had been had. “Who?”
Diana squirmed a bit and he ignored the tightening of his groin. The time for passion was past. “I can’t tell you that.”
“Minnie will tell me if ye don’t,” he said, giving her a bit of a squeeze. It was true. If the man had been a suitor then any of the Chase women could identify him.
She gasped then pushed at his chest. “You wouldn’t.”
“I would,” he answered. “Tell me the truth. Why are we in this carriage right now?”
She stopped pushing. “I…” She nibbled at her lip
His chest tightened as he resisted the urge to kiss her again. “I’ll make ye a deal,” he said. “Ye tell me what I want to know and I shall do the same for ye.”
Diana paused, her cheek twitching. Finally she answered. “Charles Crusher.”
“That egit?” He knew the man. Yes, he had swagger but no real meat to back all his pomp. “He’s not even a lord.”
She shook her head. “But he is married to a widowed marchioness. One who is rather wealthy.”
Callum growled. “I understand.” The man had tossed Diana over when a fatter purse had presented itself.
She shook her head. “Your turn. What did Jack say?”
Callum grimaced. “Well, that he had an affair with Lady Abernath and he was the man that Daring actually caught in bed with our fair countess.”
“Oh dear.” Diana tapped his shoulder. “That is sticky but doesn’t explain anything about why Lady Abernath is so angry or what she plans.”
He nodded. “He also said that Harry was conceived around the time both Daring and Jack were involved with her.”
Diana stopped tapping. “So Harry could be Jack or Daring’s son?”
Exile winced. He’d agreed to share this information because he’d needed to know that name. Something inside him had to right Diana’s wrongs, but he might have just made a terrible mistake. “Ye can’t tell them. Promise me ye won’t share this information with Minnie or Emily.”
Diana let out a long sigh. “You likely should have made me promise that before you told me.”
“Woman,” he rumbled.
She rolled her eyes. “Don’t start. I’ll keep yet another secret. It’s becoming a habit. But you should know, I’m only staying quiet to give Daring and Jack the opportunity to sort this all out before my family is hurt.”
“If it makes ye feel better, Harry’s been claimed by Abernath and he’s the spitting image of Pennington, her fourth lover of that particular time period.”
Diana slumped against him. “That makes me feel much better, actually. And it also explains Lady Abernath’s anger. Both Jack and Darlington left her when she likely felt she needed them.”
Exile shook his head. “She was sleeping with four men at once.”
Diana wrinkled her nose, frowning. “We can’t all be pillars of virtue.”
He blinked. Was she comparing what they had just done to what Lady Abernath had? “What just happened between us is completely different.”
“How?” she asked sitting up higher to stare into his eyes.
He wasn’t sure what to say. It came to mind that he had a real affection for her and yet, the end result was the same. He had a fiancée already. He’d never hated the idea more. “I would never leave ye to fend for yerself if ye were carrying my child.”
She quirked a brow. “I see.” But her frown didn’t relax. “But if I didn’t become pregnant, you’d be comfortable ruining me with a physical relationship?”
His mouth opened and then closed. He tried to speak again but no words came out. “That isnae what I meant.”
She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. Whether or not Lady Abernath is justified in her anger, I am sure she feels abandoned by the men who left her. I’m beginning to understand her motivation at least.”
The carriage rumbled to a stop. Had they reached Daring’s house already? “This conversation isnae over.” They had so much more they needed to discuss. What had happened between them, and why he couldn’t marry her.
She held her face in his hands and placed a soft kiss on his lips. “It definitely is. Good night, my lord.”
She’d used his formal address again. No more Callum, rolling off her tongue. Good night had sounded a great deal like goodbye.
Diana slumped against the front door of Minnie and Daring’s townhouse listening to Callum’s carriage roll away. What had she just done?
She dropped her head into her hands. She couldn’t believe that she’d allowed another man to kiss her, touch her intimate places. Callum’s touch was so much more exciting than Charlie’s had ever been. Her first lover had been thrilling in idea. A man not intimidated by her and willing to pursue her relentlessly. But somehow the act had been disappointing. Not just when he’d taken her maidenhead but even the kisses, the touches, they’d been…tolerable.