She’d been there to see me take the white and even to have the golden sash added, but I hadn’t been there to see her finish her studies and take on her mantle of responsibility. She was almost as delicate as the paramedic Becki was. Somehow, I’d forgotten that Suriel was so small. She’d always been the strongest of the three of us, the most determined. She never seemed small; shorter than me, but never small.
She turned and the shock of seeing her after all this time thrilled through me almost like fear. Her eyes were still that pale, bright blue that I remembered, her blond curls like a short startling halo around the triangle of her face. The black robes looked less like a priest from the front: no high, stiff collar, just a rounded neckline more like a regular T-shirt, though I realized for the first time that it was cut more like a woman’s T-shirt than a unisex one. There was nothing but the unadorned black, no red sash to mark her as an Infernalist or badge to tell me her rank or if she’d specialized further, though I knew she must have, or she wouldn’t have been sent here today. She had to have earned her blue sash for healing, because she was here to help Ravensong, wasn’t she?
She smiled and her face looked genuinely happy to see me, though her gaze took in my outfit like it was unexpected. We hadn’t been allowed to cut up our clothes at the College, so exercise was always white T-shirts with black shorts or pants; sweatshirts were allowed when it was cold. There had been a uniform for everything we did at the College of Angels.
There were smile lines around her mouth and the edges of her eyes now, but I thought it added to her beauty. I knew that my face had new lines for her to see. I was so happy to see her that it was all I could do not to hug her. I forgot about Ravensong being hurt, or that there was a major relic in a magical containment box on the floor, or that I’d bled through wounds that two medical professionals had said were too healed to bleed. All I could think of was here was my friend, the first girl I’d had a crush on, the person who had helped me study for Celestial mathematics or I’d have failed. She’d simply been Surrie, back when Jamie was still Levanael, Lev, and I had been Z, until we got older and then she didn’t like her nickname anymore.
Suriel extended both hands to me in the greeting that we all did at the College, like a double handshake.
“Zaniel, it is so good to see you.”
“It is good to see you, too, Suriel,” I said, taking her hands in mine. I did remember her hands being small in mine once I’d hit my growth spurt, but somehow that never made me think the rest of her was small, too. She was just one of those people who took up more space than her physical body did, like she was concentrated awesomeness.
The handshake wasn’t enough. “May I hug you, or is that not permitted since I’m an outsider?”
She smiled, but looked down and then said, “It isn’t allowed, but you know that as well as I do, Zaniel.”
“You’re right, I know the rules,” I said, squeezing her hands and letting them go. I started to step back, but Suriel stepped into me and wrapped her arms around my waist. I didn’t hesitate, just bent over her and hugged her back. The size difference might have made it awkward, but I’d spent a lot of years dating smaller women, because I didn’t have much choice. I knew how to fold myself down and around her. I buried my face in her hair and the smell was like coming home. She still smelled like herself, and like the College. It was both comforting and frightening that it wasn’t just the scent of Suriel’s hair that was comforting but the familiarity of the place I was raised. Be it ever so traumatic, it was still the only home I had ever known.
“Hey, Havoc, I didn’t know that the two of you knew each other that well,” Lila said; her voice had that teasing drawl to it.
I uncurled from the hug and looked at Lila with Suriel still hugging me around the waist. “We grew up together at the College.”
“I don’t hug the boys I grew up with,” Lila said, raising one eyebrow at me.
“We haven’t seen each other in twelve years,” I said.
Suriel stepped back from me and there was a stiffness to her that hadn’t been there a second before. “Zaniel and I were fast friends once.”
“Losing our friendship was the only regret I had when I left the College,” I said.
“The only regret?” Suriel said, and she looked me in the eyes in that way I remembered—so direct, her blue eyes to my brown, like she was weighing and measuring me. She’d been able to do that since she was about twelve.
“How many cuties did you leave behind at the College of Angels, Havoc?” Lila asked, giving me a knowing smile.
“What did you call Zaniel?”
“Havoc,” Lila said.
“It’s a nickname I picked up in the army,” I said, “Havoc Havelock.”
“You were in the army?” Suriel said.
“Yes.”
“When?” she asked.
“Just after I left the College of Angels.”
She stared at me again. “Your hair used to be almost black, it’s much lighter now.”
“Too much sun,” I said.
“It suits you.”
“Thanks, you cut yours,” I said.
She touched the curling edge of her hair almost self-consciously. “It’s easier to take care of.”
I smoothed my hands through my own short hair. “That it is.”
“Was he this much of a stud muffin when you were in school together?” Lila asked.
Suriel looked at me and this time she didn’t look at my face. “He did not have so many muscles back then,” she said in a voice that was utterly serious, as if Lila wasn’t teasing her, or she didn’t realize it was teasing.
“Yeah, if he keeps wearing shirts that show off his chest like that, I’m going to want to give him a hug,” Lila said, again still teasing, but she was watching Suriel with a look that was more serious than her tone of voice.
“I thought you liked girls, Bridges,” Goliath said as he walked up to us.
“Even a fish lover can admire this much beef,” she said, flashing him a shit-eating grin, one of her I’m-just-one-of-the-boys looks, which she only used on men who were giving her a hard time being a woman in a man’s profession—or, combined with the fish comment, she didn’t want MacGregor the Younger to know she was bisexual and not a lesbian. Which probably meant either he had hit on her or she was afraid he would if he thought he had a shot; either way I wasn’t going to out her, but I would ask her in private why she felt the need to pretend to be a lesbian in front of the new guy. Lila could handle herself, so if she was having issues with Goliath this quickly then we needed to know that before he got an offer to become a permanent member of the unit.
“I have interviewed Detective Bridges and Detective Ravensong; is it true that you were acting as a priest to Detective Ravensong’s priestess in a pagan ritual when the metaphysical incident happened?”
“Yes,” I said.
She studied my face again like she was searching my face for answers. I was remembering now that some of the other students had found her eye contact unsettling. It had never bothered me.
“Have you left the fold and joined the wolves?” Suriel asked.
It was my turn to search her face to see if she understood how rude what she’d just said had been. Her big blue eyes looked back at me, peaceful and uncomprehending. I’d almost forgotten the utter certainty that God and the angels were the only path and anything else was wrong, or even evil.