He pulled back first and then we let each other go, but the eye contact stayed. Frenemies, Charleston had called us, but that wasn’t exactly it, more brokenhearted friends.
Suriel said softly, “I am not the only one who missed you, Zaniel.”
“I did not miss him,” Harshiel said, looking away, but the lie was too obvious, or too late.
“The angels hear you,” Turmiel said, which was something we said at the College if you thought someone was lying.
“And the angels will heal me if I am worthy of it, I have no need of human doctors.” He started to stand but had to grab the edge of the nearest desk. I caught his arm and steadied him. He let me help him for a moment and then glared that hatred back at me, but now I was even more puzzled by it. He tried to jerk away from me, but the movement hurt enough that if I hadn’t been there, he’d have fallen.
“Please, Harshiel, let them do more tests; I could not bear it if something happens to you because I had been too zealous.”
“You were not zealous, you fought to win, as we are taught.” He looked around. “Turmiel, help me.”
The other man came but his dark eyes had widened; evidently Harshiel still didn’t ask for help very often. Turmiel came to take my place at his side, so he could keep standing.
“You are obviously too hurt to do your duty as Sentinel,” Suriel said.
“I have failed you,” he said.
She shook her head. “You have not failed me, not yet, but if you cannot move without Turmiel’s aid, then I am without either of you at my side.”
“Tell him to go to the hospital,” I said.
“We must all be back inside the walls before dark,” Harshiel said. The wording was odd, not back to the College, but inside the walls.
I looked from one to the other of them, trying to figure out what I was missing.
“If you collapse for need of a healer before we get to the College, that could keep us all out after dark,” Suriel said.
“If I am too weak to serve the angels as Sentinel, then I will take whatever fate awaits me.”
She touched his bare arm. “No, Harshiel, no.”
He looked where she touched him as if her pale hand against his muscled dark meant far more than just the hand of a friend. For the first time I wondered if there was more than friendship between them, or if he wished there was more—did Suriel feel the same? I had a moment of thinking what it would be like to be near to someone you wanted, loved, and be forever denied. I had proven that I was not that strong long ago. Had they been stronger?
She dropped her hand away from him. “We will need a car to take us home, you can’t walk far like this.”
“Maybe we can give you an escort to make up for the poor hospitality?” Charleston said.
“We would gladly accept,” Suriel said.
“Zaniel cannot be part of that escort,” Harshiel said; his voice had fallen back into the growling warning again.
“On this we agree,” I said.
He frowned at me, still leaning on Turmiel. He could not stand unaided—that wasn’t good. How badly had I hurt him? I was angry and disappointed in myself for the loss of control. I knew better.
“Are you really going to refuse medical treatment?” paramedic Roger asked.
“I will return to my home,” Harshiel said.
“Fine, if you start peeing blood then your kidneys are ruptured. If the pain gets really severe, maybe same thing.”
“Are you trying to frighten me into going to your doctor?”
“Wouldn’t dream of ruining your chance to martyr yourself on some kind of macho power kick,” Roger said.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
Paramedic Sam said, “Maybe you don’t, but I hope your healers at this College of yours are better than our hospitals.”
“They are far superior,” Harshiel said. He took in a deep breath and stood a little straighter. His grip on Turmiel loosened, but he leaned against the desk almost like he’d sit on the edge of it.
“I’ll help escort them,” Lila said, as she came to stand beside Harshiel, as if ready to catch him if he fell again. She was looking somewhere around his abs, which were a little compressed as he sat. I suddenly saw him from Lila’s perspective as a very in-shape, athletic man and she was single. I tried to remember if I’d ever mentioned that Angel Speakers were celibate. It probably hadn’t come up in conversation.
I had a moment of debating on letting her pursue him, or saving them both the trouble. If he hadn’t been hurt I’d have been tempted to let Lila try, but he was hurt and . . . I moved toward her, planning to say something, but the paramedics moved in again with more warnings and notes for the healers, and Turmiel caught my attention.
I let him lead me to the side of everything. “Master Donel requests a favor if you are willing.”
“For Master Donel, anything.”
“His sister is alone in the city now; everyone has moved away, or passed away. He would like someone to check on her. If she is in need, could you leave a message at the College?”
I was startled because we gave up all birth family when we became an Angel Speaker, but Turmiel was part of Donel’s family of birth so maybe that changed things, but in the end it didn’t matter. I said the only thing I could say. “Of course, what is her name, and do you have an address?”
“Only her name,” he said.
I wrote down the name, both the Americanized version she’d been using when Turmiel had come to the College of Angels at age seven and her original first name when she and Donel arrived from the Philippines as children. Turmiel only knew the last address of his own mother and siblings, not his aunt, but he’d been seven; you memorize your home address, not everyone else’s. I put the information in my phone and had barely gotten it when Harshiel almost yelled, “Turmiel, we are leaving.”
I reached out and clasped Turmiel’s arm above the leather bracers on his wrists, so that we gave the greeting of Sentinel brothers-in-arms. It was strange how quickly I was falling back into old habits. “Give my best to Master Donel.”
He clasped my arm and said, “I will.”
“And please tell me how Harshiel is. If I’ve truly injured him I’ll never forgive myself. It was careless.”
“I will find a way to let you know, I promise.
I wanted to hug Suriel goodbye, but there was no chance to say any other goodbyes; they were ready to go and that was that. Harshiel was determined to be gone and Suriel couldn’t seem to find an excuse to delay. Lila and Old MacGregor drove them back to the College. I realized after they left that I hadn’t warned Lila that Harshiel was celibate. I hoped she didn’t flirt too hard with him on the drive.
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
I went home, glad about it for once. Whatever they’d given me at the hospital when they bandaged my arm and stomach was wearing off, or maybe my body was finally letting me feel it. The nail marks in my arm hurt the worst, as if every scratch suddenly decided to be a sharp pain every time I used it, and since I’m right-handed, I used it a lot. The stomach was a little tender, I mean I wouldn’t want to do sit-ups, but it didn’t hurt like I’d been stabbed by a demon, though it did hurt like I’d taken a good shot to the gut. I was grateful that it didn’t hurt worse and said a little prayer of gratitude, but it was still unsettling that the wounds kept bleeding when a doctor, a nurse, and four paramedics had all assured me it was impossible for wounds this closed to bleed, at all.